do you think its right that my cousins mom isnt paying for any of her wedding??

Question

i dont think its fair. i always thought that was like a tradition!! what do you guys think???

Answer 1

Yes it is tradition, but people are getting married later in life now and have their own jobs and should pay their own way. Weddings today are put on as spectacles to "show-off" for family and friends when they should just be a day of celebration for the married couple. Most people spend ridiculous amounts of money and drive themselves crazy over the arrangements, and 5 years later don't even remember most of the day.

Answer 2

In the past that was expected, but then and again, it also used to be the case that if a girl wasn't married by 23 or 24 on the high end she was considered to be an "old maid." With the cost of weddings these days, I think it's completely unfair to expect or even ask for the bride's parents to pay for the whole wedding. That said, yes, most parents want to at least help pay for their daughter's wedding, assuming they can A) afford it, and B) support the marriage. Personally, I'm 27, my fiancee is 30, and we'll both have had birthdays by the time we get married next year, and I'm trying my best to keep my parents from paying for any of it, although I know that in the end they'll want to at least chip in. I may let them pay for my dress or something, but at our ages, there's no reason that our parents should have to shoulder that - they're all in their mid 50s and I'd much rather them keep that money to use for their retirement or just for themselves. I guess my point is that there is no longer a norm, and it's kind of like my parents told my sister and me when we used to complain that something wasn't fair - the fair only comes once a year, and this isn't it, so suck it up and get over it.

Answer 3

While in the past the tradition has been that the bride's parents paid for or chipped in for the wedding, it's not a requirement. It's kind of like getting a car when your turn 16: it's nice if your parents buy you one, but they don't have to.

Weddings these days are the responsibility of the couple who's marrying; if anyone else pitches in, that's just a bonus.

This is also an issue that should remain between your cousin and her mom; it's not really anyone else's business. Good luck and I hope your cousin has a wonderful wedding and marriage.

Answer 4

It is somewhat traditional, but if they don't have the money, maybe that is why they are not helping to fund your cousin's wedding. My husband and I paid for our own wedding, at least most of it...we rented the hall, paid the caterer, bought the decorations, the open bar...the only thing we were helped with was some money toward my dress and the church fee...It is possible to pay for your own wedding, I am sure your cousin's mother has a good reason for not chipping in.

Answer 5

Tradition isn't set in stone. Parents are not obligated to pay for their children's weddings. A lot of parents can't afford to pay for weddings and there's nothing wrong with a couple paying for their own wedding. You sound like a spoiled brat! Besides, this is between your cousin and her mother.

Answer 6

It is tradition to pay but it is not wrong not to.

My parents are not paying for any of our wedding. But I wouldn't really want them to. I have been working now for almost a decade, I am an adult and my faince' and I are capabile of fianancing our own party.

My parents are nearing retirement and we make more then they do. Why should they have to pay.

Traditionally girls got married young and they had no money. In addition weddings did not cost $25,000 in the 50s. (Not that mine is costing any where near that.)

Now if your cousins mom told her she would pay, they have something to discuss.

Now if you are afraid it'll give your mom ideas...

Answer 7

I think that she should contribute to at least some of it. At my wedding my parents paid for the food,drinks, dresses, accessories etc. and his parents paid for decorations I think it should be 50/50 or go traditional and have the brides parents pay for it.

Answer 8

Parents are in no way obligated to pay for a wedding for their child. I think you and your cousin are spoiled and expect far too much from your parents.

Answer 9

My parents are paying for our wedding, but my fiance's dad isnt paying for anything at all. We arent even having a rehersal dinner either because of that. They dont have to pay but it is nice when they do.

Answer 10

If a couple is mature and out earning their own money, they should be paying for their own wedding. Any contributions family makes should be only considered a huge bonus.