will i be lone for the rest of my life????????

Question

My problem is that i live with my father and stepmother, i am 24 years old i have no boyfriend or stable job because of them, they wont let me get a job to far away from home. i have not told them that i meet a guy at mu job he is 33 years old, my parents are pentacostal. they tell me that the day i will find some one if i follow Jesus and if i loose weight. I go to chruch, i considermeself a good christian, i would perfer better, he is not christian, i am 5 5" tall about 180 i dont think i am fat, i could loose the weight, iam on a diet. i just hate the way they talk to me. i have not left my house because i am raising my newphaw he is 2 years old. i have my mom in NY but my sister lives with her, and her son cant be with her becasue she abused him. they say that i will go to hell if i dont pick a christianmen ..... there is alot more to the story but i would have to write 1000 questions. i dont feel perrty becasue the things they same i try to keep my self looking good

Answer 1

24 years old is a long way from being past marrying age!
If you have placed your life in the Lord's hands and have entrusted your future to Him, He will guide you and you will have joy in the morning. Their are seasons of growth the He takes you through that are so hard to see past. The saying you cant see the forest for the trees applies because He is building you up into the beautiful vessel that He sees in you, you just can't see it right now.
Having been through the same sense of frustration and fear, I have questioned my state many times, I can promise you with absolute certainty that you will look back on this time and see the faithfulness of God throughout this entire ordeal and you will praise Him for not ever leaving your side.
Do use caution with the man you choose to associate with, don't be quick to give yourself to him just because you feel a bit trapped right now. The Lord has a very special man in store for you that may be thinking the same things you are right now and when He brings you two together, it will be a beautiful union. If through prayer you discover that the boyfriend you have is truly the one, no, you wont go to hell for such a decision. Live as unto the Lord, if he is the one and is willing to wait physically until marriage, then he does truly love you. If you honour God first in each decision you make, He brings honour upon you.
In regards to your weight, God's word says that man looks on the outside but God looks on the heart. If you choose to lose weight, do so for health reasons only not for what others think because the Lord sees a beautiful young woman and nothing else.

Answer 2

You are an adult. You are no longer a child. Paul says that when he was a child he acted as a child, but when he became a man he put away childish things. Your parents are wrong about you going to hell if you marry a non-Christian man. It is best if you yoke yourself with a Christian, so why not lead him to Christ? You have been saddled with someone else's child, but this does not mean that you cannot live on your own with the boy. Your parents are exercise undue influence over you, and they have no right to do so. they are intimidating you with religious witchcraft out of selfishness. This may seem rather harsh language that I am using, but remember you posted the question and gave the information and said that you wanted advice. Your parents cannot determine your destiny for you---only God has the right to do this because you are a child of God, a sister in Christ. Your parents should be treating you as an equal, rather than as a piece of property to be manipulated. I have no doubt that they love you and that they are looking out for your best interests, but parents can sometimes march down the wrong path when it comes to the welfare of their adult children. Pray about your situation as much as you can, listening to the voice of God. Jesus loves you and he wants you to serve him today and in his way.

Answer 3

get away from people that treat you bad, especially if it is family.
you are 24, they cannot tell you what to do.
if you have no children make sure you do not get pregnant, that will really slow you down from having a good life and discovering who you are. why are you raising the nephew? that is not your job, it is his parents.
since you have a job, that is great. maybe you can afford to move out into a place with a roomate.
do not worry about what happens what you die or losing weight for now...you are in your 20s, this is the time of life to enjoy yourself.
best of luck to you

Answer 4

No, you are beautiful sweetie and the Lord loves you. I just think your dad and step-mom have twisted it a bit. There is nothing wrong with being in church and following Jesus, let me make that clear. The problem is that you need to find a church you are comfortable in and will meet your needs. There are awesome churches out there with large scale singles groups and you need to think about getting out on your own too. I wish you lived in the central valley in California, I would tell you about our church. You can raise your nephew still, take him with you! Get custody of him and take him with you, there is nothing wrong with that and I commend you for being there for him, it is called foster parenting and you can get financial aide for him that way too. I was a foster parent for over 15 years and I think you really have a heart for the Lord. Don't let your parents drive you to something you are not ready for. This man you talk about, see if he is open to coming to church with you, you never know, he could really turn his life around and it would all be because you cared enough for him to ask him to come. Best wishes and prayers =)

Answer 5

Are there any christian groups you can get involved in near you for socializing, coffee houses, Habitat for Humanity, other churches of your denomination that you could visit, hang out with or socialize at?

You need to get out more somehow. Don't settle for some salesman just cause he's the first one to come along.

Your situation doesn't sound very healthy with you stuck at home raising someone else's child. In fact your nephew probably would do better with someone that really wants to care for him not someone who is forced to.

Answer 6

The first thing you should do is get a job, save your money, and move out. Also, start looking into grant/loan programs for school. You can never have enough education. The only tricky part is your nephew, but you really need to get yourself out of this situation. Once you can attain personal fulfillment, the rest just seems to fall into place (ie personal relationships)

Good luck to you, and feel free to e-mail me if you have any questions.

Answer 7

Honey I am so sorry you are being so physiologically abused. I know for a fact that you are a beautiful soul. You are exactly the way GOD designed you to be. Many men love Big Beautiful Woman. I know I married such a man myself. You are pretty. Look into the mirror, look yourself in your eyes and say "God constructed me in his image". The bible specifically states we are to uplift one another, and we are to love our neighbor as ourselves. Why on earth would the parents who are suppose to love you tear you down so badly? I feel they are using belittlement as a method of control. They are afraid you will grow wings and fly far away, like your sister did. I feel if your sister in a child abuser, it is because it is a learned behavior from all three of your parents. It is not to late to break the vicious cycle of abuse. You my dear are being abused. Mental and Emotional abuse are very real. Break the cycle of abuse for that sweet nephew of yours. BTW, you are not alone, will never be alone, and GOD has created that special someone just for you. GOD will send him to you when you are ready for love. Right now, you need to heal the mental torment of a psychologically abused childhood. I can't tell you to move out, only you know if you are ready for that, but I can tell you that once you do, you will gain a whole new prospective on life.

God Bless You

Answer 8

Sometimes it takes a huge leap of faith in yourself to give up the security of home for the risks of independent living.

But in order to "spread your wings" and really be "who you are", you do need to get away from your parent's influence. It sounds impossible to live with.

You are 24. You are old enough to be on your own and to support yourself and your nephew. On your own.

You should pick someone who YOU believe is right for you. No one else has to live with them, so don't worry about what your parents think about his religious convictions. You choose a man based on qualities that are important to YOU.

Answer 9

Invite Jesus in to your life as your savior and your won't be alone in life. You need to go out and live on your own instead of living with your parents.

Genesis 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.


You will meet someone someday and become His wife.

Answer 10

YOU WONT GO TO HELL IF YOU DONT PICK A CHRISTIAN MAN. WHO'S TO SAY YOUR MAN WOULDNT EVER BECOME ONE? THE BIBLE JUST SAYS CHRISTIANS SHOULD BE TOGETHER BUT IT DOESNT SAY YOU WILL GO TO HELL. THE ONLY THING THAT SENDS A PERSON TO HELL IS REJECTING THE LORD. SO DONT WORRY ABOUT IT. YOU SHOULD BE PROUD OF YOURSELF FOR RAISING YOUR NEPHEW. I'M SURE YOU ARE A PRETTY GIRL. NO ONE HAS THE RIGHT TO TELL YOU WHAT YOU SHOULD DO W/ YOUR LIFE. YOU DO WHAT YOU FEEL IS RIGHT NO MATTER WHAT ANYONE ELSE SAYS.