Why do I get frusterated when I get a compliment?

Question

I've been trying to lose about five pounds and work out just to tone up a little bit. I don't think that I'm overweight but some days I feel a little chubby (as most women do, I'm sure). Everytime I say that I want to lose wait or I feel fat my Mom/friends/boyfriend give me a dirty look and tell me that I'm being silly. They say to me, you get hit on all the time, and all I can say is guys hit on EVERYONE. I know I'm not OVERWEIGHT, but I just feel that I want to lose weight. When I say I feel huge, they tell me that you have to be huge to feel huge. I get so frusterated when I say this because I want someone to see what I see in myself. I want someone to admit to me every once in awhile that maybe I could afford to lose 5 pounds. I'm 5'6 and weigh about 130-135 lbs. I have a large chest and a "bubble butt" (which is where everyone says all my weight goes). What do I do about this? If they see such a beautiful girl, why can't I see her too? Am I being too hard on myself?

I'm definately NOT fishing for a compliment which REALLY ticks me off because when I mention it people tend to think that's what I'm doing. PS. I LOVE my life, was just acting a questions. Thanks anyway though honey.

*asking (sorry! :))

Answer 1

This is more of a low self esteem issue. Im sorry that you dont see the beautiful girl that you are. I am 5'6 and weigh 147. Hard to believe because I don't know where it goes...My trainer said it's because of muscle which weighs more than fat. Makes sense since I was always active in sports growing up in school. My stomach is flat, my butt is hispanic...lol and my boobs are pretty much normal c cup. I been dropping weight in a healthy manner and I love it. But sometimes I look in the mirror just like you and see that I need to lose weight to feel better. Maybe you feel that way because your boobs make you look bigger? Do you have a small medium or large frame. I'm a medium frame. You may be too. The truth is there is a difference between losing weight and toning up. You shouldnt lose any weight. Your just at the right weight for your height. i think you should stick more to your toning routine.

Listen up...Just because you don't see yourself as this thin pretty chik doesnt mean that others see you that way too girl! It shouldnt be them your getting upset with.it should be yourself. What would posess you to blame them for your low self esteem? To them your beautiful inside and out. Lighten up. Who cares what your family n friends say? Are you going to let them get in the way of your determination of getting fit? Cuz you know you shouldnt. Do what makes you happy as long as it is in a healthy way. Thats all.
Personally, i had to get over this as well. I know its easier said than done but coming from someone who had a depression phase because I didn't fit in my skinny jeans anymore....TRUST ME! the world keeps revolving. Good Luck....Be safe....

Answer 2

I feel the same way. But the only people that say I dont need to lose weight are friends and their parents. My parents on the other hand tend to nag on me about being fat or losing weight. I'm not fat at all.. I know that much. I guess I'm chubby though. However, with the height and weight you are saying you are, I wouldn't think you were a little chubby at all! My best friend is 5'4 and 130 or so and is a size 2 or 4. So if you are 5'6 and the same weight as her, you can't be that chubby at all. But then again, its hard to tell because I guess it does all depend on where most of your weight is at. I'm almost 5'7 and I definately weight a lot more then 130 but if you asked anyone they woudln't guess my correct weight.

Its understandable to get frustrated when someone gives you a compliment when you feel this way. I never believe my friends when they say I dont need to and that I could get anyone I want. Its hard to listen to other people around you because it isn't what you see yourself.

I think the reason we dont see ourselves the way others do is because we aren't confident enough. I know I am being too hard on myself, but it is hard with parents like mine who expect you to be stick thin. And i'm sure you are being wicked hard on yourself too. Maybe you don't need ot lose any weight but instead tone your body. That would probably boost your esteem and self image! I hope this helps! And i'm sure you are beautiful.. hope that didn't frustrate you! Just take compliments and accept them!

Answer 3

Yes, you are being too hard on yourself. Your family and friends and boyfriend are trying to tell you that they love you just the way you are and you should start being comfortable with yourself as well. You are very fortunate. Many people have families who rip them to shreds at every turn. One thing that might help is to write a note to yourself about all your good qualities and put one in your purse, one on the bathroom mirror, one in your car and one at work in your desk. Even if you aren't ready to consciously hear the message, it will get through to your subconscious. Just be patient with yourself. You've already won half the battle by being surrounded by people who are uplifting your self-esteem. All the best!

Answer 4

Yup, you are being way to hard on yourself. A big part of this is because you buy into what society insists is beautiful, and not necessarily what actually is beautiful. Be more concerned about who you are, less about how you look.

Answer 5

Here's an idea...quit looking in the mirror, quit fishing for compliments, quit expecting people to tell you how they really think that you look...cuz most wont. Now....go have fun, make memories, love someone, and be happy for God's sake...sheesh

Answer 6

Because you don't know what to say and it feels awkward. Next time, the only thing you need to say is "Thank you" and smile. That will satisfy both parties involved.

Answer 7

5'6" and 130-135? You sound hot.

Hint: No one likes a stick-girl.

Answer 8

YEAH MAYBE YOU ARE A LITTLE HARD ON YOURSELF AND THAT GOES BACK TO GETTING FRUSTRATED WHEN SOMEONE DISAGREES WITH THE WAY YOU SEE YOURSELF, MAYBE YOU DON'T WANT TO BELIEVE THEM AND YOU SEE YOURSELF IN A DIFFERENT LIGHT ( HOPE U UNDERSTAND) ALOT OF WOMEN DO THAT TO THEMSELVES I AM ONE OF THEM. SO GOOD LUCK WITH EVER THING AND TRY TO LOOK AT YOURSELF THROUGH THEIR EYES INSTEAD OF YOUR OWN.

Answer 9

you can still exercise, don't say you want to lose weight, say you want to be healthy, get tone up.

just eat healthy and exercise regularly

Answer 10

God has created girls as a delicate creature so why do u wana look huge ???