If you are always fighting with someone in a relationship, then is it really love?

Question

We have been dating for almost 2 years and I am so tired of the constant fighting. Just want to know what everyone thinks.

Answer 1

I had a girlfriend that used to say that fighting mean that you really cared. We fought all the time it seemed. And then I had to go away for five months. I met someone else and fell in love. And we never fought. We had disagreements but worked them out very quickly and without yelling or crying. And then I realized that you don't need to fight to care for someone. I married her and have never been happier after three years of marriage. What my ex said was BS.

Answer 2

Constant fighting is the sign of a bad relationship. Where is the love? You two would rather express anger that love towards each other. For whatever reason, you two are not on the same team. You two are on opposing sides and not working together as one team. You both have the need to win rather than seek the best possible solution for situations. You both have very poor communication skills.

If you two do not plan on working together, being more loving rather that being angry, and finding a way to effectively communicate, you need to break up because this is not love.

This is not going to get better just by simply hoping for better. You have to really work at it. Read a book about communicating in relationships. Take the first step if you really want this relationship to work. Swallow your pride. Admit your role in the fighting. Remember, it takes two to tango. You can’t start a fire without a spark. Don’t feed into a heated discussion. If he doesn’t follow suit after you have tried these changes, it is time to call it quits.

Answer 3

It depends what you are fighting over! If the fights are about a lack of love and commitment in the relationship then it could be a one sided love, or not love at all. Depending on who is starting the fights and what they are about would really be the determining factor. It's really up to you to decide if it is love and what you can do to save it! If you couldn't see yourself with anyone else then you should definitely take action to stop the arguing because it's horrible for your health, self esteem and of course your relationship! It wouldn't be right just to end it right away because of the fighting because I am sure you would both regret it when you don't have each other anymore! Basically you need to assess what the fights are about, how you feel when you aren't fighting and take action to stop the constant battling! Once you have done that you can determine for yourself if it is really love.

Answer 4

There are no perfect relationships but this is in just disagreeing don't get married it won't make it better once the fighting starts it will get worse i would say you all could go to counseling and if there are children between you. then you
should still you seek counseling for the kids sake you can love some one and not like them i hope this is not confusing for you if you are fighting like you say move on leave the best way you can if it all possible that you guys could leave in peace as friends this would be best for you time away from each other will give you both time to see what you really mean to each other you are to close to your situation to really see what is going on you know the saying you cant see the Forrest for all the trees you relationship is not healthy now and it is going to take a big change to fix it if you can best to back off and give it to God.

Answer 5

In every relationship there is fight.. some people fight a lot some people disagree and avoid the fight and keep that thought deep in heart which comes out later and becomes big issue.

It is good that you both fight and speak your mind freely.. if you avoid the fight then that thought will remain with you and next time similar situation comes you will feel too bad.. the pain will increase. I think its always better to talk things out.

I also think that every individual has to work hard for the relationship, one has to make things work...
I am also in a 3 years relationship and we fight a lot.. but we still love each other.. and whenever I try to imagine myself without my guy.. I feel terrible and I realize how much I love him and that becomes my motivation to work for my relationship.
All the best for your relationship!!
Enjoy life and let go few things.. there are many bigger important things to take care of right?? :)

Answer 6

In a relationship there will be misunderstandings etc, but once there are fights of any kind. I'm getting out and will look for some one else in time. Those fights can lead to bigger fights with the police being called in domestic abuse as well as some one going to jail.

The next worse case scenario is that some one can get seriously wounded or killed. Once you have not reached that (Red Line ) call it a day and move on. Once two people can't make it and are fighting the situation is pathetic.

Answer 7

i used too be in your same situation hun-- i know what it's like. i've been with my boy for a year and 8 months-- and we used to fight CONSTANTLY and it was just so tiring.

you need to talk too him. you really do. that's the only way it's going to be resolved. you both need to SIT down, and just TALK. not yell or scream @ each other, but just talk. you have too really tell him how you feel. tell him that it's literally killing you inside that you guys are fighting like this and you love him and you WANT to make this work.

you BOTH have to learn to just take it easy with each other and let the small things go. i know, it gets h*lla tough in relationships because of A LOT of things-- i know more than anything, but it can work. i promise. just try hard but make sure he tries JUST as hard too. just start doing little things for him too show that you really love him and appreciate him, and HOPEFULLY he'll do stuff for you in return sometimes too. just don't expect anything-- lol. you know men!! lmao.

anyways-- good luck sweetie!!! i'm sure everything will work out for the best!! i hope this helped and best of wishes too you two!!

Answer 8

Its possible, not really healthy but possible. Sometimes people whom are very similar fight alot so maybe if your personailites are just very alike so u naturally but heads. It all depends on what your fighting about. Is it bickering or like serious arguments. Has it been like this for 2 years or is the fighting recent? All these things come into play.

Answer 9

That's how my marriage is. If it's major problems (like drinking) or things he refuses to change, the nyou would be better off leaving...especially if you aren't married. I'm starting to realize myself just how short life really is and I don't want to spend any more time with someone who brings me down. There's a million other people out there to date.

Answer 10

I fell in love with someone and we started fighting all the time. I know it was love because it grew stronger everyday. In the end, we broke up and remained friends. I will always love him, though. Sometimes love isn't enough.