Inebriated drinker says to the bartender (with a drunken slur), "Bartender, buy everyone in the house a drink, pour yourself one, and give me the bill."
So, the bartender does just that and hands the man a bill for $37. The drunk says, "I haven't got it." The bartender slaps the guy around a few times then throws him out into the street.
The very next day the same drunk walks into the bar and once again says (with a drunken slur), "Bartender, buy everyone in the house a drink, pour yourself one, and give me the bill."
The bartender looks at the guy and figures to himself that he can't possibly be stupid enough to pull the same trick twice so he gives him the benefit of the doubt, pours a round of drinks for the house, has a drink himself and hands the drunk a bill for $37.
The drunk says, "I haven't got it."
The bartender can't believe it, so he picks the guy up, beats the living day lights out of him, and throws him out into the street.
The next day the same drunk walks back into the same bar and says (with a drunken slur), "Bartender, buy every one in the house a drink, give me the bill."
In disgust the bartender says, "What, no drink for me this time?'
The drunk replies, "No, you get violent when you drink."
2006-07-20 22:38:55 · 8 answers · asked by ethermanx 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
This one is definitely a funny one. I laughed soooo hard that I had to run to the restroom. Do you have anymore funny ones? Keep up the good work!!!! You have one fan here.
2006-07-20 23:01:19 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
hehehe. check these drunks:
Two drunks were trying to figure out how to get some alcohol for free. They only had a dollar in change between them. "I've got it, follow me." said the first man.
They went to a hot dog stand and bought a dog and threw away the bun. "We'll go into a bar and order drinks, and when the bartender asks for money, I'll unzip my fly and pull out the hot dog. You drop to your knees and pretend to suck me off."
The second man agrees to this and they start their rounds.
When they get to the bar, they sit down and have a beer. The bartender tells them, "That will be three dollars."
The first man stands up and upzips his fly. The second man drops to his knees and starts sucking on the hot-dog.
"You *******!" screams the bartender. "Get the hell out of here!"
They run out and go to another bar and order drinks and when the bartender asks for money, the first man unzips his fly, and the second man drops to his knees. The bartender throws them out.
After the sixth bar the second man complains, "Man this isn't working out so well, My knees are killing me!"
"You think you've had it bad," the first man exclaims. "I lost the hotdog four bars ago!" .
2006-07-20 22:42:27 · answer #2 · answered by ♥Gilmore♥ 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This one started out as part of a vaudeville routine, possibly Weber & Fields, but yes it is funny.
2006-07-21 00:25:57 · answer #3 · answered by JVHawai'i 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lol funny one mate!
2006-07-20 22:46:04 · answer #4 · answered by London qirl . 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol awesome! check ya later â¥
2006-07-20 22:44:13 · answer #5 · answered by ♥ The One You Love To Hate♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not bad not bad lol
2006-07-20 22:42:09 · answer #6 · answered by missieclass 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you could just write a novel you know,PUNK.
2006-07-20 22:41:55 · answer #7 · answered by rich-k 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol... nice
2006-07-20 22:42:20 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋