how do i go about telling my 14yrs old daughter about the birds and the bees?

Question

my daughter is hanging around now with boys a bit older then her so i feel i need to tell her a bit about life and boys

Answer 1

Just be open as your daughter is already hanging out with older boys so that shows that she knows more than you expect. Tell her in a more gentle and straight forward way and about the consequences so that she is willing to accept and learn instead of picking round the bush and be a nagger as such manner will only irritate her and cause her to be rebellious.

Answer 2

I agree whit the most answers that she probably already knows a whole lot and that you should have talked to her earlier.
But I still believe there is a lot you can tell her about.I'm sure that as a parent you want to share your values on sexuality and that's a good thing too.As she is no longer a little kid try talking to her as an adult.Ask her about her feelings and idea's about sex and respect them.
Create an open dialog where it's clear for her that she can talk to you about everything and you respect and love her no matter what happens.Share your worries,talk about birth control but don't be judgmental.That only leads to mistrust.She will keep her sex life to herself and tell you what you wanna hear and do the rest in secret.
Asking her about it and showing interest is also a great way to prevent you from going too fast because we all could be wrong too about her knowing everything.Make sure she is well informed and once again let her feel that she can talk to you and you will not get mad because you love her unconditionally.
Hope you have a pleasant talk whit your daughter and good luck.

Answer 3

I have 3 girls..ages 12,10 and 6.....
I have been telling them about the human body (correct names for body parts)
and their functions for quite a while. I want them to learn from me, not their peers. I have been feeding them information whenever the oppurtunity comes along. I notice quite a few of their friends are "boy crazy" already at such a young age (times are changing...hence so much teen pregnancy) I am always open and open minded with my girls.. Your daughter is 14 and if you haven't ever attempted to talk with her before now she may feel embarrassed and uncomfortable at her age (you know how teen girls can get lol) If I was in your shoes, I would approach her very casually at first and kind of ease your way into the topic. Kind of put it out there and let her bite. You need to kind of fish around and see what she knows already or what she thinks she knows. With a topic like this you need to also be her friend as well as her mother, because you want her to come to you and not others. GOOD LUCK!!

Answer 4

You should have done it long before now. She probably heard all about it in rumours in the school etc. Leaving it until she is 14 can cause problems when she doesn't have the correct information. But as hard as it is to confront the subject the best way to do it is to be totally honest. Tell her all of the slangs etc. This way she will be educated to make the best decisions for herself. Did you know that most kids are sexually active by 14!

Answer 5

Just be honest. However, she is pretty old not to have already had this talk - she probably knows it all via her mates, magazines and TV. You probably want to talk to her to check that she has her facts straight and doesn't believe any of the stupid myths like 'you can't get pregnant the fist time' etc etc. Also, she needs to know that it is OK to say no and wait to have sex, that she doesn't have to do it just because everyone else it etc. However, teenagers often think they know best and will go ahead and do things they perhaps shouldn't anyway, so the most important thing is that she knows that whatever happens she can come to you if she needs to.
Good luck.
x x x

Answer 6

At 14 she probably already knows. sex ed at school would have taught her the basics but a relationship talk and what most boys want talk might be more appropriate. u dont need books, just tell her what u feel she needs 2 know and try 2 avoid embarassing her, she needs 2 feel she can talk 2 u about anything so dont pry in2 her life unless the information is offered and dont push the subject.

Answer 7

she probably already knows a bunch but might not know the details. Just sit her down and tell her you want to talk to her about sex. That always gets their attention. She will be embarassed but keep going. Tell her you want to give her the true facts before someone else tells her wrong.I remember a boy telling me I could have sex with him because it would only be once and you cant get pregnant the first time. I would have pictures of the internal workings of a female and a male. Make her listen to you. and keep talking even if she acts like she isnt listening. Have info on STD's on hand. I dont condone sex at 14 but I really dont condone them being ignorant about what they can catch. She is hanging out with boys whose hormones are raging. She needs to be informed unless you can be with her 24/7. Not only would I explain the workings of the female body but I would explain the beauty of saving yourself for the right man and how precious it is to give yourself to the one you really love. m

Answer 8

Tough isnt it?
I have a nine year old and have recently started talking to her about it as I could see what was being discussed in the playground. It was scaring her so I had to explain at a very topline level. She is fine with it. I will move onto other details as we go.
I have a very open relationship with her and that makes it easier.
I suggest talking gently rather than giving her a book, books are fine for after but wouldnt you rather hear these things from soemone who loves her most in the world?

Deep breath and lots of loving reassurance and you will be fine.
All the best
IQ.

Answer 9

The thing is teenagers are smarter than what they get credit for meaning she probably has an idea of what the birds and bees are. The best thing to do is sit her down and explain in a educational way how babies are born, after you have told her ask if theres anything she is unsure about and if she has any questions..............oh and rememebr dont give too much detail as theres nothing more embarrassing than your mum givin too much information

Answer 10

I never did understand parents waiting to have a big "talk" with their children about sex. All through their lives there are chances to give them bits and pieces of info to save yourself and them this horribly embarrassing experiance. My oldest daughter is 7 and she knows the basics of sex and where babies come from. She has a 5y/o brother, a 3y/o sister, and a 4month old sister. When I was pregnant with the 3y/o I decided it was time to give her a little info. She really wanted to know how the baby got in my tummy, when I was pregnant with the 4 month old I gave her a little more info.
Give your daughter chances to ask questions on her own. Talk about things you see on TV or in the Newspapers about pregnant teens. Let her know if that ever happened she could come to you and from there she'll ask any questions she has left.
Sorry, but I'm guessing at her age she knows most of it already. You can't shelter your kids from life. What we don't teach them they learn on the playgrounds or parks or TVs or whatever.