Is your mom-in-law like this?

Question

I will try to make a long story short. My Mom-in-law & I have never seen eye to eye. The problem started about 3 years ago. When our son was 6 weeks old, she left him outside a store in his stroller by him self. She told us that she didn't see the need to bring him in. And that it was OK beacuse she did it with her kids and they are fine. Since then we don't trust her with him at all.
About 2 months ago we had a little suprise, we found out that we are pregnant again with our 2nd child. When we called to tell mom-in-law our good news she told me point blank on the phone to go and get an abortion. And when I said " I don't think so!" She told me to go to hell!
About 5 days later she called and asked my husband if I got rid of the baby yet? And when he told her that this child will be loved just as much as our son ( Who will be 3 in Aug), Jason is. She told him point blank that she will not have anything to do with this child. And his sister told him the same thing. Thoughts?

I am just wondering if anybody has gone through this? We have been happliy married for over 5 years. She wants me to kill our child. She saids that I have no right to bring this child into the world. And that I am ruining her son's life.
I am the only person ( sis-in-law can't have kids) who will give her grandkids.

Should I call and talk to her or should I just cut the whole family out of our lives all together. Feelings or thoughts?
Thanks
Jennifer :o)

Oh yeah, something else I didn't tell you.
1st: In laws live in LA, Ca. which is about 500 miles south of us ( Redding, Ca)
2nd. When she has been her she will go into our bedroom and distroy any pretty bras or panties of mine. And skirts I have that are "short" 3-4" above the knee are distroyed too. Hubby talked to her about it and she says that she can do what she wants, I am only his wife and she is much more important than I am. we now lock our bed room.
3rd. The last time they spent over night about 5 months ago. The mood hit us around 3 am. And in about the middle of making love she bursts into our bed room and tells me to get the Fu*K of of her son. and then runs around to the other side and asked him if I hurt him. And then told me that only a whore would be on top. And that I am an unfit mom because I enjoy sex to much!
We told both of them to leave our house at once! And she told me I had no right to kick them out! Hubby had to call the cops to get them out !

Answer 1

Your mother-in-law is a psycho. Go out and buy a tiger. Have the tiger eat your mother-in-law. Do this immediately. There is no other way to deal with this situation.

Answer 2

It's incredibly common for parents and in-laws to not see eye to eye on things, but that is just ridiculously abhorrent and disgusting behavior.

I think at this point cutting off ties completey and immediately doesnt sound like a bad idea at all, but if you are feeling kind you can seat them down and agressively tell them that they will either shape up and accept the reality, or that you will make sure they never see your child indefinitely.

Your children don't need to be around that at all. And it's your duty as a mother to protect them from anything that may harm them. Especially a meddling mother in law who neglects one child and considers another a mistake or a burden.

Think about it this way, how would you feel against your grandmother if your mom told you 20 years later that you were unwanted?

That woman won't be missed.

Answer 3

I am in a similar situation....my husband and I have been together 3 years now and my m-i-l has never liked me and is constantly saying cruel things about me... I am lucky though my hubby now works with a company where we travel a lot.

My suggestion would be RUN FAR FAR AWAY!!!!! Boot the m-i-l and the rest of the family that agrees with her out of ya'lls life, move if you have too. Making a marriage work is hard enough without some pyscho mother-in-law trying to cause problems. Plus you do not want her warped feelings towards the younger child rub off on your older one.

I hope that your life gets better for you........

Answer 4

You and your children absolutely cannot be around this woman. Not only is she stark-raving crazy, she is dangerous. Anyone would leave a baby (or child, for that matter) outside a store is insane. To not realize the seriousness of her actions in inexcusable.

Anyone that doesn't recognize the commitment you and your husband have made to each other, be it MIL, sister, or whoever needs to go.

She now wants you to kill your child? For whatever reason. she has a deep seeded hatred for your and, apparently, anything that comes from you. God only knows what she would do if she were to be around you, your son, or your newborn. Her not wanting to have anything to do with this child is a blessing.

If she is going to continue to spew venom, block her number or change yours. The last thing you and your husband need to worry about now is a vicious shrew who wishes you harm. If necessary, get a restraining order. You and your husband should do anything you can to protect your family from someone that has shown she has no qualms about being violent. Good luck and God bless with this one.

Answer 5

I had a similar experience with my mother in law. although she didn't suggest abortion. This lady took to joy out of every thing

There is a book called Boundries. Sounds like you need to set some boundries with your mother in law. She will take your lives and drag you all down. Her son is now your husband and he needs to stand up to her. Tell her that you choose to live a happy joyful life and that her negative comments should be kept to herself.. Don't let her make you feel quilty. Thisi s how she controls you all.
Move away if you have to. Have consenqenses with her. for instance, it she ruins thinksgiven, then you will not spend christmas with her. She is welcomed to visit but if she is
disruptive then it will be two months before she can visit again.
She will complain and say she is being treated like a chilid. Well= she is acting like a child, Anyou are the parentsnow
NEVER let her babysit if she continues to leaaaaave baby alone

Good luck, YOU have the chance to have a happy sweet life with your wonderful babys

Answer 6

Psychotic much? Sorry, that wasn't very nice.

When I was pregnant with #4, we told my grandmother (big mistake). Initially, she didn't say anything, but the next week, after my oldest daughter moved in with her dad (custody dispute-her choice), grandma told me, "The judge agreed for Samantha to move in with her dad because you're pregnant." Funny, but my ex and his wife had twins the day AFTER Sam moved in with them . . . four and a half months before my son was born.

With every pregnancy, Grandma's comments were nastier than the previous and everytime, she's extremely hateful towards me until the baby's about six months old. I haven't seen her since Christmas Eve 2004 and I haven't talked to her since June 2005. She has only seen pictures of my youngest son and he is almost 16 months old, but the stress level has diminished to almost nothing.

Good luck and just remember that the well being of your family (you, husband, son and baby-to-be) is more important than the rest of the family's psychosis!

Answer 7

Wow. How sad.

Congratulations! to you and I wish you lots of happiness, joy and love to your family.

You, your husband and two children will have a great life together :0)

The in-laws obviously have some very serious issues that you do not have to take on.

They are your husbands family though, so if somewhere down the line he, for whatever reason, wants or needs contact with them, be sure to support him in his needs, but I'd keep my kids away from them.

Answer 8

Woah!Sounds like your husband needs to put his pants back on and show his mom & sister that he stands by you & your family 100%.

If your husband is letting his mother talk to you like that, you all got some serious problems. You two need to talk about this seriously, because ignoring it will make things worse in the long run.

I personallythink your mother-in-law sounds like a psychotic !@#$*
... but that's just my opinion & that's not what matters here.

I wouldn't even try to speak to her, until you and your man have spokentogether about this. Try to avoid her for now, and keep your other little baby away from her. What you said about her leaving him alone... nooo way! I would have kicked her @$$!

To make it easier for you, avoid her, and you'll avoid confrontation. Speak to your man first. If he doesn't step up, you two should talk to a marriage/family counselor.

Answer 9

i thought I had the mother in law from hell. I would cut all ties with her all together. if she wants you to abort this baby, she is not a loving and caring person, so why would you want your kids to be around someone like that?? You never know what she will tell your children in the future, so I would say for their sakes, they do not have a grandmother. good luck to you!! and the baby!!

Answer 10

This one is easy. Toss her out of your house, call the police and go get a restraining order on her for your entire family.
Find out what the trespassing laws are in your state.
In a lot of states, in front of the police, you have to tell them to leave your property and if they come back they will be arrested.
But I don't know about all states, so call the police station and ask.

Answer 11

Am I missing something here? Were you and your husband on a break and the child's not his? This makes no sense.

Well, you didn't answer me but, from the other details, I can figure that the answer is no. Well, she's a pshyco and you should not allow her to come near you or your kids. Talk to your husband about it, but get a restraining order if you can. If he wants to visit her (and he should) that is fine, but she should not be allowed in your home or near your kids.