What do you think are the most obvious signs of a spoiled child?

Question

We have an only child. Every day I pay close attention at how we raise her; we don't want her to grow up to be a spoiled brat. I'm from a family of three and my spouse two.

Answer 1

Don't cater to her every whim. Give her opportunities to experience loss, pain and limits when possible. Teach her a good work ethic, and empathy for others. These are things that usually are learned if there is a 'pecking order' of siblings.

I usually can't stand how parents baby their only children. It is not teaching them how to be a productive citizen, only how to be self-absorbed and hateful.

Good luck!~

Answer 2

Most obvious signs are when the child acts snobbish in the company of others of same age, wants whatever asked for at thet very time, is least understanding, avoids the commands of parents...its not necessary that single child turns out to be spoilt.You don't have to raise her as if she's the only one, give her some responsibilities, discuss things with her, try to explain to her the conditions of other children, speak good, and talk about moral stories etc.Children are flexible and u can flex and mould them the way u want to, without being harsh on them....do not worry.

Answer 3

Don't coddler her, Don't give in to every request or demand she makes.

If she's obstenant and disrespectful, she's spoiled and needs SERIOUS time outs!!

Don't allow her to "talk back" to adults. Don't allow her to be selfish with her toys.
NEVER BARGAIN with a toddler!!

Be firm and follow through!

My son is an only child. But I never allowed him to get away with disrespectful behavior or selfish behavior. I actually demanded he call ALL other adults, Sir or Ma'am. This included Grandparents, Aunts and Uncles..even my adult cousins.
When I grounded him or put him in Time Out, I never bargained iwth him to let him shorten his time outs. If he started a scene in public, I removed him from the situation.
There's no excuse for a temper tantrum in public!

He's now seventeen and an absolute joy to be around! He and his friends are all well behaved, honest, trust worthy and simply good natured. He's very giving and compassionate, loyal, athletic, a hardworker and a good student. He doesn't hold grudges as he feels they're a huge waist of time and energy and is really layed back.

...and no, we're not some crazy religious types either.

Answer 4

If you only plan on having one, they are inheritanly spoiled. They lack the ability to share with others what they have materially and recieve more emotionally then if there were siblings involved. They grow up in an all adult environment at home which skews the natural process of child development on their level of maturation. This is not spoiling or negative, just a very realistic perception to your parenting that should be considered in your approach.

Answer 5

children do not spoil, fruits do. The thing is, she will have more and get more attention as an only child. This will be a perk in her life and one she deserves (my opinion) for not having siblings. It is your responsibility to teach her what it is to be a child, friend, humanitarian and someday; working woman, wife, mother. It is not about what a child receives in life. It is worrisome when they are not getting something. Like moral values, expectations and responsibilities to name a few. I know an only child who is 16 and a lovely young woman. Raise your daughter with love and teach her right from wrong. The most time consuming and rewarding job you will have. :)

Answer 6

I just love it when some people automatically assume an only child is more susceptible to being a brat than one with siblings.

I was an only child, and when I was a kid I knew several brother/sister teams who would play off each other and make their parents' lives hell.

Raise your kid to be a good person and stop paying attention to stupid stereotypes.

Answer 7

Don't be afraid of discipline. You are the authority, so instill it in her when she's young. My parents were "strict" but I turned out well. My mom's sisters make fun of her so much for how strict she is/was, but I'm so much more well adjusted and well behaved than many of my cousins and I'm proud of her for that.

And do not, I repeat, DO NOT give her everything she wants. This goes especially for food. She will start throwing tantrums if you start saying no too late, and giving whatever foods she wants could cause her to be obese had have a hard life because of it.

Answer 8

Healthy boundaries.
Myself I'd have to say that with my first son I spoiled him by taking him shopping in the same way I would take him to the park...I know now that teaching him that shopping is an activity and not just a necessity is probably what made him spoiled. Shopping shouldn't be something we do for entertainment.

Answer 9

when you see a 5 year old have a temper tantrum in the middle of the store because mommy won't buy her what she wants. at a very yound age, i would take my daughter to a store, and not let her get anything. now, she can go in a store and if i tell her no, she's say ok, and go on to the next thing. I can't afford to give her everything, but I think it's better that way.

Answer 10

Spoiled? Unsympathetic toward others who have less than. Ungreatful. Expectant. Refuses to do anything without a "pay off". Unwilling to share. Begs. Whines. Bribes. Greedy. Impatient.

Blessed child? thankful/greatful for what they have. Willing to share and or do without. patient.

Best wishes!
Mom to 5 blessed children.

Answer 11

Tantrums!!!!! if the child throws a tantrum as soon as they don't get their way, and you give in to easy this can be seen as spoiled. When they get older they will continue to throw the tantrums. Believe me a teenager throwing a tantrum is not a pretty sight.