What should I do?? My sister is a heroin addict and I have helped her 3 times to get clean?

Question

and each time i have allowed her to move in with me for a week she has remained clean for that week and she really wants to be off it ,but has been on it 6 months and every time she returns back home to her boyfriend who gets it for her she ends up back on it every time, she is back here again staying for a week to get clean but i am scared that when she goes this time the same pattern will repeat itself over again should i still keep helping her or what should i do?? any advice appreciated

Answer 1

Report her boyfriend to the police!!

Answer 2

That is a tough one, and please do not consider me an expert at all—just friendly (and hopefully useful) advice.

You say that she continues to come over for a week at a time to try and get clean. If she continues to go back to her old ways, tough love may be in order. If you are socializing/in contact with her during the "unclean" periods, then maybe you need to help her get clean and explain (as she is clean) that you love her very much and enjoy the time you spend with her, but that she can only be a part of your life if she is not doing heroin. Ultimately, they have the freedom and the responsibility to make the choices that affect their lives and their health.

Another option (or maybe in conjunction with the first one) is to confront the boyfriend. It would sound to me like someone needs to convince her to dump him if she truly wants to stay clean. Does he do heroin as well? If so, this would probably be for the better. Otherwise, perhaps you need to sit with him—and maybe your sister at the same time—and tell him that her desire is to get clean and stay clean of drugs. Someone needs to stress to him the importance of helping her stay clean and not just doing what she wants. This includes getting drugs for her (whether it's her request or not), or possibly using the same drugs for himself when she's trying to stop.

If it's that important of a relationship to either of them, then they should be willing to make some sacrafices and make it work. If not, then he's just enabling her. Are you against her staying more than a week with you? I can understand if it's difficult and not really an option, but she seems to be more successful with more encouragement and support from the right people. Maybe you can offer to let her stay longer—I'd leave the length up to you to decide. But make sure she stays clean, otherwise she needs to move out.

Ultimately, I would recommend a drug counselor or some kind of professional help. You are doing great when she's with you, but someone that is a trained professional can help both of you to take steps to keep her clean one day at a time.

Answer 3

You need to have her stay with you for longer than a week my love, it took my cousin 7 weeks of pure hell to go through his withdrawal.
He was literally locked in the room, and only left that room under supervision to go and use the bathroom.
Your sister needs to go through it all again, but you must realise that she will never have a chance of being clean without her family supporting her all the way.
You do have to be cruel to be kind, and you have to be so strong for her.
Her boyfriend is obviously the problem, and you should report him to the police and get an injunction out on him. The main thing is to keep your sister away fron him at all costs. He will soon get bored of waiting.

Good luck with it all mate!

Answer 4

4 her 2 get clean she has 2 want 2 do it 4 herself & be strong. i believe that tough love is sometimes the answer, if u walk away from her it may push her 2 get clean also it could have the opposite effect of making her worse. i really feel she needs professional help, she could be prescribed methodone 2 help with the withdrawals so she's less likely 2 use again. i think the professional help is probably the best solution, offer 2 go with her 2 her doctor is she needs support. i sincerely hope this works out 4 u both.

Answer 5

The first thing any professional will tell you when trying to come off drugs is you HAVE to get rid of the people (friends/boyfriend) who take the drug with you. She will never be able to get clean unless she stays away from her boyfriend for good. If she is serious about getting clean she will have to finish things with her boyfriend for GOOD. And she has to want to do it. It is really good of you to try and help her get off it but she may need to go into rehab for a while to help her with the withdrawals, she will probably need to go on Methadone for a while as well. She will also

Answer 6

I don't know how to do it. You must have the patience of Jobe. It must be difficult when it's a close relative. I have no time for junkie scumbags and their mates, they're liars, thieves and manipulators.
But that's an opinion and as I say, I haven't got a loved one in that situation, so I dare say I sound holier than thou.
You surely can't get clean in a week anyway.
You'll just have to hope the bf OD's. maybe that will bring her back.
Just keep loving her and do what your heart tells you. It sounds big enough.

Answer 7

Time for tough love, sorry. Turn the boyfriend into the police. And your house is not where she can get clean, she needs to probably be in a hospital or detox center. If she's to stay off drugs, she is going to have to make the decision to be clean, it's her fight, not yours. You've done more than enough to help her, but she's got to help herself. Refuse to help her unless she's willing to enter some kind of treatment program. Best of luck to you, and her.

Answer 8

My dad is a heroin addict...he's been on it for 6 years. He went to prison for 20days once and that wasnt enough for it to be out of his system. He's now in prison again but for 6 months so he should be clean when he comes out. Maybe your sister just needs to stay at yours a bit longer until its all out. I'd possibly give her an ultimatum too...you never know it might work...I know this is extremely difficult for you and your family to see, but it is hard for her too. If its anything like my family (majority will not speak to my dad at all), then it tears the family apart...just explain to her what its doing to you all...but anyway, DO NOT LET HER LEAVE THE HOUSE UNTIL SHE'S DEFINITELY GOT IT ALL OUT OF HER SYSTEM OR THE WHOLE THING IS POINTLESS!!!! Best of luck anyway, and I hope I've helped you in some way...you aren't alone...just keep working at it and don't give up on her, she needs you...

Answer 9

Take her away now girl its the only way even if you get rid of boyfriend she will mix with people on it and she needs to be clean a while and get mentally strong again this takes a while, maybe she would be better moving away and a clean break altogether!! Good luck to you and her you will need it xx

Answer 10

Your sister has a problem, as you well know, but until she is ready to rid herself of her addiction it won't go away. You can lead a horse to water and dunk it's head in but that doesn't mean it's drinking, that just means it got it's head wet. She has to leave her boyfriend, clearly he is not right for her but making her see that is going to be tre difficult. He is part of her addiction, and you are right, if she goes back to him she'll repeat her mistakes. As angry as I was when it was done to me, the one thing that might make her see the light is to have an intervention. Gather all the people who love her and make her sit and NOT SPEAK just listen as her family and friends plead with her and try to reason with her. Chances are it will piss her off but she will get the message. Another thing that I learned through my experience is that no matter what age the child, a parent always maintains the right to have their child committed to rehab. It would be beneficial if she made the choice to go there herself but getting an addict to step away from there addiction is like asking anybody else to give up the air that they breathe, it is unfathomable. You are an excellent sibling to go through all of this for you sister, the very essence of love is to be supportive through thick and thin. I applaud you for that. Gather your resources, tell only those closest to her and yourself, and wait for her to realize that she has to MAKE herself get better....wanting to is fine, but doing it feels near impossible, help her see that she can do it. Good luck to you and your sister.

Answer 11

Dont let her go just after a week, wait till she been there for at least 2 and explain that she shouldn't go back! and if it happens again think twice, i know she is ur sister, but u cant keep doing it, if she's not willing to help herself after she has left, then its a losing battle!