I am a stay at home mom of two children and my sister in law works part time. She asks me to babysit her kids while she goes to work, only when her childcare is closed, which lately has been a lot. other than calling me to babysit for her, we don't have a relationship anymore. Should I still babysit her kids for her? She has never babysat my kids for me, and I won't even ask because I don't like to impose on others.
also she has caused a lot of drama in the family, and thats why we are not close anymore. She is very jealous and vindictive, but I am the kind of person who like to help others, and I feel like if I help her out, she will stop being a "hater" to me.
2006-07-20 11:37:19 · 17 answers · asked by CoutureCutie 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
oh and she doesn't pay me...and with her kids and mine I am taking care of 4 children total, ages 18 months- 4 years old.
2006-07-20 11:52:53 · update #1
she is my husbands borthers wife.
2006-07-20 11:54:49 · update #2
This is tough if you want to keep peace in the family. However, you are being taken advantage of by your SIL. The next time she calls, simply tell her very nicely that you already have plans and you won't be able to babysit.
If you need a babysitter and you trust her with your kids, you should definitely ask her to sit. Turnabout is fair play. She will also realize how much of an imposition it can be.
Lastly, when she calls you should make a joke about how you babysit so much for her that you're going to call your house a day care and start charging. Then while laughing, ask her how much her daycare charges so you can compare rates.
Also, she is not going to stop being a "hater".This is her way and being nice to her will not change it. She will only continue to impose on you until you are babysitting her kids full time for free. She knows that you are not a troublemaker and will play on that to her advantage as long as you allow her to do so. Stand up for yourself.
With all of these hints, she should get the message. Being a stay at home mom is a full time job and you shouldn't have others responsibilities dumped on you free of charge. Good luck.
2006-07-20 11:53:21 · answer #1 · answered by stseukn 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Maybe you could politely suggest that she starts paying you what she would normally pay her daycare provider. Just explain that once in a while is okay but now that it is more frequently financially it has become a burden. Reassure her that you don't mind watching the children but you are having to feed two more children breakfast lunch snacks. You use more electricity, more garbage etc. Just be polite about it and if she goes for it you'll make a little cash on the side which would feel good. I bet she either pays you or finds someone else to free load off of. By doing it this way your not being mean your just being financially honest:)
2006-07-20 11:43:42 · answer #2 · answered by Knock Knock 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she is taking advantage big time. but i think you need an change of attitude. you will never be able to get closer to her as a friend, which i think you want to be friends, but she sounds like a trouble maker and manipulative and you gotta stop letting her use you. Maybe you should let others help you for a change. Get her to babysit for you once, let's see if she'll return the favour just the once. if she can't do that for you, then you know for sure she's using you. If she does babysit once, she might realise how much pressure she's putting on you.
2006-07-20 12:11:04 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should tell her to pay you something because it is not easy taking care of many kids at once I have two and sometimes that is a hand full and if she feels that she doesn't need to pay then she should take her kids somewhere else because you are providing snacks, food drinks and things of that nature and all of that is not free. I understand that you want to help her out because that is the kind of person you are but she should be giving you something to watch the kids
2006-07-20 11:49:14 · answer #4 · answered by ~Ms Eli~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is taking advantage of u she should pay u something it doesn't matter that ur a stay at home mom i am 2 and my sister in law work and i watch her to kids and mine and their 6 mons 3weeks 2yrs and 4yrs and i just had my baby he 3 weeks and she pays me to watch her 2yr old and 6 month old everyweek and she should the same ur not running a daycare u have trouble watching your own never less hers and she should pay
2006-07-20 12:05:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no hell no, you are definitely being taken advantage of unless she is paying you really good. Honestly, I would not babysit for her EVEN if she offered to pay me if she truly caused all that drama and if she is a hater towards you. This is emotional blackmailing in a way. She is playing on your "like to help others out" good-will.
2006-07-20 11:44:27 · answer #6 · answered by The Prince 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
possibly you need to courteously recommend that she starts paying you what she might commonly pay her daycare service. in simple terms clarify that when in a jointly as is okay yet now that it fairly is greater commonly financially it has substitute right into a burden. Reassure her which you do not innovations observing the little ones yet you're having to feed 2 greater little ones breakfast lunch snacks. you utilize greater electrical energy, greater rubbish and so on. in simple terms be well mannered approximately it and if she is going for it you will make slightly money on the component which might sense good. I guess she the two will pay you or unearths somebody else to loose load off of. via doing it this sort your not being recommend your in simple terms being financially honest:)
2016-11-02 10:32:40 · answer #7 · answered by lurette 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to say this, but you are the epitomy of a spineless. If i were you , every time she asks (maybe every other time) I would tell her you are going to the movies, lunch, whatever w/ a friend on such & such a day & ask if she would return the favor. If you find she can't/ won't for whatever reason (twice would do it for me) I would be "busy" every time she asks.
Call her & invite her kids over for the day or even overnite but do it when it's convenient for you, not her.
2006-07-20 11:48:55 · answer #8 · answered by catkeypurr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take her kids because you WANT to have them. You shouldn't have to take them to save face. Ask her to watch your kids for a few hours so you & your husband can enjoy an evening out. If she hums & hahs or flat out says no, then you have your answer on whether or not to say yes for next time. Obviously she's using you.
2006-07-20 11:44:27 · answer #9 · answered by MysticHerring 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should help her out b/c she is family. If she is your brothers wife and you don't want to watch her kids, then don't. But if she is your husbands sister, it gets a little complicated. Whatever you do just try not to offend anyone.
2006-07-20 11:44:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋