I am 35 and have been dating the smae guy for 3 years, he has become very clingy and needy and i just want to end the relationship. He is at my house almost every day and really deosnt do much else. How can i break up with him in a nice way?
2006-07-20 09:15:09 · 19 answers · asked by stargazer 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
"nice" is not really the issue, because if you respect him you will realize that staying with him out of pity isn't doing him any good. it's more about integrity than niceness. try not to feel guilty, because there's no other way to go in this situation than to tell the truth as simply and respectfully as possible. if it's not working, he will probably realize it too eventually and be glad you ended things. especially when he understands how dependent on you he's become- a position most people don't really enjoy. don't assume you have the power to ruin lives! it's going to be okay!
2006-07-20 09:59:08 · answer #1 · answered by Carly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yup. like Some Dude says, there's no nice way. By the way, I hope someone else ends a relationship with you when you become clingy and needy. (And don't think you'll never be that way... or maybe you're not human?) I'm not sure that's a good reason to end a relationship.
2006-07-20 09:21:46 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no matter how you do it, it will hurt. it will hurt him more than you and even though you might feel bad now. it is better to do it now than let more time go by and it will be harder later. if i were you, i would do it gradually. if you say he goes to your house every day and you want this to stop. one take his keys away. explain that you need to change your locks for x, y, and z reason. then if he continue to show up at your house, u dont have to open the door. ingore him. then if he calls, just tell him u were talking a shower, or cooking or talking on the phone and did not hear the door.
if he continues to call u all the time, you might think of changing your number. again u can explain that the reason u need to was because of too many weird calls.
also if he has friends or if you guys have mutual friends have them take him out and you can come up with the (i am too tired or need to catch up on work from work, or whatever)/
you might also think about taking a trip by youself, even if it is for a local hotel just the weekend. tell him it is something with work. it will give you time to sort out some the issues in your life and make it a bit easier to figure out how to break up with him.
BUT, IF YOU just want to be mean about it, make him catch you kissing another guy and have some guy friend he does not know leave his car at your house and have him sleep in your sofa and come out with you in the morning, just as your boyfriend is coming to see u.
2006-07-20 09:28:16 · answer #3 · answered by lasalle_1986 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
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2016-12-02 00:25:13 · answer #4 · answered by jerklin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Aaaah yes, the clingy, needy, help me please, I have nothing else in my life type... Yes, been there before... No, not me personally, rather, I've had the ex that was that way. There's no nice way to break up... is there? Bottom line is that you need to be honest with him, and more importantly with yourself, because even if you try to sugar coat it - he's likely to make you feel guilty, and maybe make you feel like you haven't given him a chance, or that he'll change, etc.... Make your decision for you... And remember no one is in control of you and your emotions except for yourself! And the same holds true for him also! You're not responsible for how he feels when you break up... it's his choice of how he chooses to be affected! Good luck!
2006-07-20 09:22:47 · answer #5 · answered by loving father 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him the truth, you met someone else. That is why you want to break up in a nice way. You have been with him for three years, come on your not leaving for him so that you can be by yourself. You met someone, yeah there is someone else and he will have to be big enough to accept that.
The alternative is to tell him he needs to get a check up, because you may have contracted S.T. D's. This lets him know he is not your only partner.
2006-07-20 10:40:32 · answer #6 · answered by Gingerbread Man 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Three years is an investment, but, just like monetary investments, things can go bad. Being straight forward would be the best way. Or, just finding a place to be, when you are normally home. He may grow tired of not finding you home or he may be waiting for a long time, waiting for you to come home. I would still say the best way is to tell him. Good Luck!
2006-07-20 09:25:04 · answer #7 · answered by icemountian8 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are too nice he WON'T GO AWAY. Be firm, tell him you need to move on with your life and so does he. You don't have to be mean unless he crosses a boundary, such as hanging around your house every darn day doing nothing. Then you gotta kick his *** to the curb. Sounds like you have been too nice already.
2006-07-20 09:20:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh honey, there is just no nice way. You're gonna have to be mean if you want him gone. Be blunt, and cut him off now. It is really the kinder thing to do in the long run. Good Luck!
2006-07-20 09:19:51 · answer #9 · answered by Legs 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is not a nice way. Just show him this question but I bet he still won't go away. I hate clingy men!
2006-07-20 09:19:01 · answer #10 · answered by Prinzes 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋