How can I help my 12 yr son stop bedwetting?

Question

I have taken him to the dr and he prescribed a med that doesn't seem to help. I have also taken him to a therapist to talk about any issues or problems he's having. He doesn't want to talk about it. Recently I talked to a chiropractor to see if he can help with the bedwetting problem and I am scheduling an appt with him soon. When my son was with is dad last month, he only had 4 accidents within 2 weeks. When he's home, he's wetting daily at night. I do believe that it is more psychological and emotional then medical. I think I am willing to try anything to help my son have a normal childhood and to be able to feel comfortable with having sleepovers. I don't punish him for having the accidents, but I do punish him when he sits there in his wet clothes as if there is nothing wrong. I do expect him to take a shower if he wets the bed and to remove the linens so they can be washed.

Answer 1

Wow....this same question has been asked several times today.

Have you taken him to a doctor? You need to have a urinalysis done to make sure he doesn't have any infections or anything. Then you need to see a urologist and get an ultrasound done to make sure all the plumbing works right.

DO NOT threaten him and DO NOT punish him. I'm sure he is embarassed and upset by this problem.

After that.....here is my son's story -

Our stuggle with enuresis

Keithen turned 7 years old in February and still wets the bed at night and sometimes has accidents during the day. Here is a little about our journey with enuresis.

When my son turned 5 he was bedwetting every night and having at least one, usually more, accidents each day. Our family doctor did a urinalysis to make sure he didn't have any infections or anything and that came back normal. He referred us to a urologist. The urologist put him on Ditropan. He also ordered an u/s. I filled the perscription and waited a bit, unsure if I wanted to give it to him. We decided to wait on the u/s, feeling pretty sure that this was not physical but instead a discipline one. (Didn't care if he was wet...wouldn't stop what he was doing to go...engrossed in play...we saw a pattern to when accidents happened...etc.)

That wasn't working so we tried the meds - I think we did a total of 3 doses of Ditropan. He HATED it. There was no pretty color or flavoring to it to make it palatable to kids. It smelled very strong and tasted nasty. The side effects were horrible. He would get dizzy and he fell asleep in the middle of the day. With the start of Kindergarten coming up soon, I felt the side effects were unacceptable. I didn't want him getting sleepy like that when he was in school and he was simply not himself on the medication. We stopped them - like I said I think we tried 3 doses. We struggled through the rest of the year on our own.

Around his 6th birthday, someone on the Mothering boards suggested chiropractic to me as a treatment for enuresis. We were open to the idea and decided it was worth a try. Through a network of local mothers, we found a chiropractor with special training in treating kids.

We started treatments 3 times per week. This did seem to help. The first time that he woke up dry, I honestly cried. I was so happy for him to see that he was making progress. And I was so relieved that maybe we had found an answer. At our next appointment I had to choke back tears of joy and relief as I told our chiropractor our good news. I even asked to give him a hug because I was so deeply grateful for the help he had given my son.

Shortly after staring treatment, he was waking up dry about once every two weeks - a huge accomplishment compared to how things had been! And his number of daytime accidents decreased. Around this same time we had a checkup with our family doc and with his urologist. We refused to try the meds again because of the side effects. We reported that the chiropractic treatment was helping and agreed to do an ultrasound. The ultrasound came back normal.

As his chiropractic scans got better and his accidents decreased, his visit frequency decreased. After a couple of months of chiropractic treatment, our chiropractor suggested that we try DHA supplements. These made a HUGE difference for us. This was probably the point that nighttime accidents went down to once a week or so. Daytime accidents at this point were reduced to ones that seemed undeniably behavioral (only wetting while playing on the computer). We were doing so much better!

You may wonder why the DHA supplements were recommended and how they help. Children with enuresis have increased levels of prostaglandin E2 and nitric oxide. Omega-3 fatty acids are known to inhibit the synthesis of prostaglandin E2 and renal nitric oxide. Bed-wetting children have an underdeveloped region of the brain that controles nighttime micturition (as noted by their inappropriate startle response). Omega-3 fatty acids play a critical role in the development of and function of the CNS including micturition control and startle response. Nations with the lowest prevalence of bed-wetting children consume more than double the fish/seafood as compared to the nations with the highest prevalence of bedwetting children.

A week before his 7th birthday, I was frustrated once again. He had backslid. He was no longer cooperating with taking his DHA and he was wetting the bed almost every night. (He still wears pullups to bed.) He had been having a daytime accident several days per week again. I still think those are mostly behavoral - tied in to computer/gameboy/etc. - activities where he is super focused. Chiropractic visits are now only once every 2 weeks as his body looks good, so I don't think the increase in accidents was due to a physical problem.

We have gone through periods of taking his Gameboy away waiting for him to go a week with no daytime accidents. A month after he turned 7, things seemed to be looking up. He was having occasional dry nights and was having more dry days than wet ones.

I think I do need to get him back on the DHA on a regular basis as the drop in the DHA levels in his body may be creating some of our problems (at least the night-time part). I may have to find ways to sneak it into his food if he continues to avoid taking the pills. We had to stop seeing the chiropractor back in April because we couldn't afford it anymore. He has definately regressed since then. :-( I wish we couldn afford to go back to regular adjustments.

Last year in Kindergarten he only had 2 or 3 accidents at school all year long. This past year, in first grade, I think he had 2 or 3 accidents at school which were "giggle pees" when he was laughing too hard with a friend in gym class and at a class party. I'm relieved that it hasn't been a big problem for him at school. I remember that my cousin was "that kid" in grade school who was always being sent to the class for clean clothes. I remember the stigma that it can carry to be the "stinky kid" who wets his pants. I am thankful that he doesn't seem to be dealing with that at school.

I hope our experience helps some other families out there who are struggling with this problem. I know I am eternally grateful that we found chiropractic and the DHA supplements to help our son instead of going the traditional medical route with the prescription drugs.

Answer 2

Please no punishments, if he is still bedwetting at this age there is something medically wrong. My son had the same problem and we tried everything even, I am ashmed to say, punshiments like grounding, making him wash his own sheets, etc... We then had him a the dr one day and we happened to have to see the PA instead of his regular dr and she told us that it is really common for children to have a problem having a complete BM and that puts pressure on their bladder making it impossible for them to hold the urine through the night. She prescribed something called Miralax and he mixed it with any beverage he wanted morning and night, it didn't change the texture or flavor of the drink. We let him have chocolate milk as a treat or make him a small milkshake at night so it didn't seem like a chore. Within a few days he was going to the bathroom on sechedule with no problems, this is not a laxative like we are used to not cramps or loose stools. The bedwetting stopped that week. He continued to use the Miralax for a few months and then his body learned to void completely and he has been bedwetting free for 2 years. It has been a blessing for him he can have sleep overs and feel comfortable. We didn't know how much an impact this was having on his life until we got a handle on it. Please see you dr asap when you get a handle on this you will see an amazing change in your son he will be so much more self assured and confident. Good Luck to you and your little boy.

Answer 3

If he is having less accidents at Dad's, then it's probably not a physical problem, but you should be sure that there is no physical problem before you do anything else. If you are sure, then you can try this:

First of all, don't let him have anything to drink after dinner. Next, you may have to deprive yourself of sleep for a week or two. Try getting up several times in the night and checking on him. If he has not wet the bed, have him get up and go to the bathroom. You want to train him to wake up in the middle of the night. If he has wet the bed, have him get up right then and take a shower and change the bed. You want to have him associate wetting the bed with being uncomfortable and disrupted (you don't have to be mean, just matter of fact). If you are consistent, he will probably stop having this problem within a few days, but hang in there if it takes a bit longer.

Be sure you explain the plan to him before you begin and emphsize that you are not punishing him but trying to help him. Tell him you will need his cooperation and promise him some type of reward or celebration when this is all behind you.

This worked for me with my daughter who is a very heavy sleeper, and it was advice that was passed onto me from a friend who had success with it as well.

Answer 4

Electric blanket. Just kidding.

Limit liquids at least an hour before bed and make sure he's emptying the tank before he goes down. While a slight concern due to age it could also be he's a heavy sleeper. In that state it's not uncommon to lose some control of bodily functions.

You may also want to investigate hypnosis as a safe alternative to prescription medication.

Good luck, I'm sure it's tough on everyone not the least of which is you!

Answer 5

Have the kidneys and uretres checked. If it's not that, it's from the top floor! Probably very sensitive. Don't make a big deal about it, help him relax! Use training pants (there are versions even for adults) if necessary and make sure nobody treats him bad (usually that's how sensitive kids react when they have to witness nervous breakdowns, yelling and stuff). Good luck

Answer 6

sounds like he might have a problem if he is still wetting the bed at age 12. I would take him to the dr and find out what is wrong. I'm sure it's just something simple that can be easily fixed.

good luck!

Answer 7

Sounds like a physical problem that should be evaluated by a doctor. Meanwhile, you can put plastic sheets under his sheet. That will at least keep the mattress dry.
Also, keep him from drinking any liquids about two hours before bed.
Good luck !

Answer 8

You can't - he'll stop on his own - Actually stop all drinks 3 or 4 hours before bed , unless he gets really thirsty .
protection is a bigger issue- Use a rubber pad on the mattress, use those disposable diaper-type pants .Try leaving a nite-lite on . Don't yell at him . He can't help it .

Answer 9

make him go p before bed time and don't let him drink after about 8:00 pm.If this continues take him to the doctor he could have a bladder problem.
Stress could be causing it too !

Answer 10

The most important thing is to not criticize your son for bedwetting, it would most likely only worsen his problem.

Answer 11

Sure...my 9 yo boy went from briefs to boxers about a year ago...(all I wear is boxers...unless i am working out or playing sports...duh), let him wear what he wants...my boy now wears a variety, boxers and once in a while boxer briefs...