I''m a recovering alcoholic and and have no social life anymore. I don't think I will ever get over my ex-girlfriend unless I start dating someone else.
I've been going to meetings for 3 years but I have still yet to find a single close friend. Lots of people know my name, but I've never been invited to a party or asked out for coffee.
I've tried MATCH.COM and another site, but I always get the same answer, sometimes immediately. Either women:
1. Just don't want to date anyone that's a recovering addict/alcoholic.
2. Don't want to date anyone that doesn't drink.
I was just hoping someone could tell me why?
I'm 45, single, live alone and a pretty nice guy. Women in recovery generally don't date men in recovery. I don't think i'll ever find a wife.
It's been a few years now, and I find myself so lonely that I think of suicide alot.
My question is, since I can't seem to meet anyone by telling the truth, should I just lie about my alcoholism?
2006-07-20 08:27:01 · 6 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
To me, it doesn't matter if a guy is a recovering alcoholic. There are plenty of other women who are like me. But don't lie about your recovery. Women will like you for who you are. A woman will come into your life when you least expect it.
2006-07-20 08:31:45 · answer #1 · answered by Fallen Angel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a friend who was an alcoholic for years , He hit rock bottom and his life was changed by God, and now he is a different person. He is NOT a recovering alcoholic, he's a new person. He is so different as if he never was an alcoholic. I've known the guy for over 4 years and been around him day and night and he has no desire to drink alcohol. Not even when I had wine right in front of him. If I was a woman, I would date a guy like that. Other than that, no, I wouldn't risk it.
My father in law was a "recovering alcoholic" and reverted to the old self. You're either a new person, or the same old recovering person. Sorry if I sound harsh, but that's what I believe.
2006-07-20 09:15:11 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
perchance this can help: i do not drink significantly better than a thimble-finished of alcohol a year. I pretty a lot continuously turn down a drink, who favor pop or tea or water. even as requested why (no longer very typically), I clarify that as a smooth man or woman I drank and positioned that i did not like the influence it had on me (slurred speech, as a rule). seems to me you may be honest sufficient about no longer ingesting without revealing you're a convalescing alcoholic. that is truthful to say you don't love the influence booze has on you, and so that you retain away from it. The AA conferences received't develop into an situation till you're waiting to quiet down with someone who will comprehend your finer characteristics. in case you attain that factor, and nonetheless favor AA to stay sober, that may be the time to describe why you retain away from booze. even as that is commendable to be up the front rapidly, keep in mind that is -all- they learn about you. you want the threat to enable them see how nicely you do without booze and the way nicely you retain away from the stuff before declaring the previous. by using retaining off in this tips, you supply them a probability to get a extra balanced view of who you're. desire that permits.
2016-10-15 00:31:57 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you shouldn't lie about it but maybe you shouldn't put it out there at first glance. You have a better chance of meeting someone without that bit of information. Maybe once you met and develop a friendship you can bring that up and at least she will know you on a more personal level before they judge you.
2006-07-20 08:32:38 · answer #4 · answered by shae 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i like honesty from people... this is me- this is how i am.... i dont know what kind of women you are meeting but thats crazy....i cant see why thats a problem? i dont drink, only like once a year and i have no real need to do so, i grew up with alchoholic parents and i respect you quit drinking..i wish my dad would ! you should get a myspace ( its fun) and look up local women in the" browse"....be patient things will have to get better! good luck!
2006-07-20 08:36:11 · answer #5 · answered by pinksgirlfriend 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honesty is the only way to be . If they don't like you for who you are then it is not meant to be. I am sure there is someone out there for you .Just be patience your will find her or she will find you.Be yourself not someone your not .
2006-07-20 08:37:05 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋