i am sad,i dont know why,help me if you can?

Answer 1

Planet Mars will be the brightest in the night sky starting August. It will look as large as the full moon to the naked eye. This will cultimate on Aug. 27 when Mars comes within 34.65M miles of Earth. Be sure to watch the sky on Aug. 27 12:30 am. It will look like The Earth has 2 Moons. Don't Miss it..... The next time Mars may come this close is in 2287.

Answer 2

You need a cowboy joke to remove your sadness.


Cowboy Logic


A few years ago, the Sierra Club and the US Forest Service were presenting an alternative to Montana ranchers for controlling the coyote population.

It seems that after years of the ranchers using the tried and true methods of shooting and/or trapping the predator, the tree-huggers had a "more humane" solution.

What the Sierra Club proposed was for the animals to be captured alive, the males castrated and let loose again, and the population would be controlled.

All of the ranchers mulled over this 'amazing' idea for a couple of minutes.

Finally, an old boy in the back stood up, tipped his hat back, and said, "Son, I don't think you understand the problem. Those coyotes ain't ******' our sheep - they're eatin' 'em."

Answer 3

Hope this will make you laugh:

Little Johnny was sitting in class doing math problems when his teacher
picked him to answer a question. "Johnny, if there were five birds sitting
on a fence and you shot one with your gun, how many would be left?"

"None.", replied Johnny,"cause the rest would fly away."

"Well, the answer is four," said the teacher. "But I like the way you are
thinking."

Little Johnny said, "I have a question for you now. If there were three women
eating ice cream cones in a shop, one licking her cone, the second biting her
cone, and the third one sucking her cone, which one is married?

"Well," said the teacher nervously, "I guess the one sucking the cone?"

"No," said Little Johnny, "the one with the wedding ring on her finger.
But I like the way you're thinking!"

Answer 4

Your first step is to find out what is making you sad.Are you not happy with yourself or some thing outside.If your pray about it and belive that god is your lord and savior and that he sent his only son to die on the cross for yours and mine sins so we could have everylasting life And remember that though him all thing are possiable. With him I promise from experience that he will bring you more happiness than you can handle.

Answer 5

listen to this joke
>A BROWN man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the
>only BROWN man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.
>The white man said:
>"Coloured people are not allowed here"
>The BROWN man turned around and stood up. He then said:
>"Listen sir... I was born I was BROWN"
>"When I grew up I was BROWN"
>"When I'm sick I am BROWN"
>"When I go into the sun, I'm BROWN"
>"When I'm cold I'm BROWN"
>"When I die I'll be BROWN"
>"But you sir .."
>"When you were born you were pink"
>"When you grew up you were white"
>"When you're sick, you're green"
>"When you go in the sun, you're red"
>"When you're cold, you're blue"
>"When you die, you're purple"
>"And you have the nerve to call me coloured?"
>The BROWN man sat back down and the white man walked away.

Answer 6

A man and woman were dating and he asked her to marry him. She told him to prove his love to her she wanted him to get her name, Wendy, tattooed on his penis. When it was erect is said Wendy and when it was limp it said “Wy”. They got married and went to Jamaica to a nude beach for their honeymoon. Wendy told her husband to go get them a drink so he went to a stand on the beach and noticed the man who was waiting on him also has a “Wy” on his penis. He said oh you must have a wife named Wendy too and the waiter said no mine says “Welcome to Jamaica and have a nice day!!!”



A little boy and his father are at the zoo when the little boy sees two lions having sex.
"What are the lions doing?" He asks his father.
"Baking a cake."
Later that afternoon, the little boy and his mom are walking in the park, and they see two dogs having sex.
"What are the doggies doing?" He asks.
"Baking a cake."
That night, the boy catches his parents having sex downstairs on the couch. He says nothing, and goes back to bed. In the morning, during breakfast, the little boy looks at his parents and says,
"I know what you were doing last night, you were baking a cake. And when you were finished, I licked the icing up off the couch!"


An old couple celebrate their 60th anniversary and a week later the husband drops dead. One enquiring mourner at the funeral asks the wife how the husband died, to which she replied "Well, when my husband was alive we used to make love every Sunday to the rhythm of the church bells. In with the dings and out with the dongs"
To which the mourner replies "Well, I mean no offence, but you are both old,no wonder that killed him" The old woman snaps back at him, "What are you talking about! If that ice-cream van hadn't gone past he'd still be with us now!"


Little Johnny was always cursing at school. One day the teacher asked the class, " Can someone tell me something that starts with the letter A? Little Johnny pipes up"Asshole". She scolds Johnny and asks" The letter B? Johnny sticks his hand up and says" Bastard". The teacher repeats the question all the way to the letter R, of course not allowing Johnny to answer. At R Johnny jumps up again, raises his hand. The teacher hesitates, trying to think of swear words beginning with the letter R and finally gives up. OK, Johnny she says, go ahead. Johnny proudly proclaims, Rat, A big fu**ing rat about this big. i thaught of darron



Bush and Cheney were out walking when they came upon a dog cleaning himself. Bush looked down at the dog and told Cheney " I wish I could do that, and Cheney replied, Do you want me to hold the dog for you " !

A man and his wife were sitting in church, the man was sleeping and his wife was knitting. The priest asked "Who created the Earth and man?" The woman poked the man with her knitting needle and the man screamed, "GOD!" The Priest looked at him and said, "That's right."
Then he asked "Who is God's son?" Once more the woman poked her husband with the needle, he woke up and screamed, "Jesus Christ!" Again, the priest said, "Correct."

Finally, the priest asked, "What did Eve say to Adam when she didn't want any more children?" The knitter poked her husband again, but this time he screamed "Poke me with that thing one more time and I'm going to rip it off!" The priest smiled and said, "That's right."


A hippie gets onto a bus and sits next to a nun in the front seat. The hippie looks over and asks the nun if she would have sex with him. The nun surprised by the question politely declines and gets off the at the next stop.

When the bus starts on it's way the driver says to the hippie, "I can tell you how you can get that nun to have sex with you." The hippie says that he'd love to know, so the bus driver tells him that every Tuesday evening at midnight the nun goes to the cemetery and prays to God. "If you went dressed in a robe and glow in the dark paint mask she would think you are God and you could command her to have sex with you."

The hippie decides this is a great idea, so that Tuesday he goes to the cemetery and waits for the nun to show up. At midnight sure enough the nun shows up and begins praying the hippie jumped out from hiding and says. "I AM GOD! I have heard your prayers and I will answer them, BUT ... first you must have sex with me." The nun agrees but asks for anal sex so she might keep her virginity because she is married to the church. The hippie agrees to this and has his way with the nun.

After the hippie finishes he stands up and rips off the mask and shouts,"Ha! Ha! Ha! I'm the hippie!!"

Then the nun jumps up and shouts, "Ha! Ha! Ha! I'm the bus driver!!"


A guy walks into a bar, sits down and orders a beer while pulling out a bottle and a paper bag from his coat pocket. The bartender thinks nothing of it and continues to work.
After about 2 hours the bartender finally gets curious and asks the patron what's up with the bottle and bag. Without a word he reaches into the bag and pulls out a tiny piano and a foot tall man, who begins to pound out some R&B. The bartender is baffled and asks how he got it. The patron begins to tell the bartender that he was going thru the back alley and slipped on the bottle fell and hit his head. When he came to there was a genie waiting for him to make a wish.
The bartender was a little skeptic but had never seen a foot tall guy play a piano. So the bartender grab the bottle and rubbed it and released the genie before the patron could stop him. The genie pop out and asked him what his wish was, and the bartender immediatly spat out "I want 10 million bucks!". 'Poof' the genie was gone and all a sudden 10 million ducks pour into the bar.
Understandably the bartender got pissed and was about to punch the patron untill he said "Dude, do you seriously think I asked for a 12 inch "pianist"?"

Answer 7

well i can't really tell you unless if you told me
what's wrong or what happened.
maybe you should see a doctor,therapist,orpsychatrist.

Answer 8

your hungry go eat a sandwhich

Answer 9

talk to a doctor.