In your experience, which is harder?

Question

Is it harder to grow up in a home where the parents are unhappy or harder to grow up when your parents are divorced? Speaking from experience on each situation, let me know how that situation affected you.

Answer 1

Parents SHOULD NOT stay together in misery just for the kid's sake. It does nothing for the kids. My sister and brother and I cheered when my parents finally got divorced since they were so miserable together. It made family life impossible. Kids should see healthy happy realtionships or they will never have them themselves. And having mommy happy with step-daddy counts more than mommy hating daddy.

Answer 2

My son reacts very strongly, emotionally if my husband and I aren't getting along. If he hears any arguing or if someone just raises their voice a little, he tries to act like a peacemaker. Kids will react to that tension. I think a child growing up with divorces parents where at least the tension and unhappiness is gone, though it is hard not being with both parents at the same time, is better than the potential of the other unhappy couple home. My parents blossomed after their divorce, found wonderful other partners, and it made for a much better situation.

Answer 3

My parents have been married almost 59 years and never had a fight ever.
But if I had to choose I think I would rather grow up in a home where my parents are divorced. That way you don't have to listen to all the fighting, yelling, and name calling. I am a single mother and my children had a pretty good life they had everything I could give them plus love. The only thing they didn't have was me around all the time because I worked 2 jobs to support them. They are good kids and they are emotionally stable. I don't think you can get that when the parents are fighting all the time.

Answer 4

Ok, here goes. Ive grown up with both, sort of. Me and my 2 sisters and brother have the same mother but all different fathers. My dad was a 'one night stand' my mother had so i have never known him. This obviously didnt affect me at all, ie you cant miss something youve never had. My mother was married to my younger sisters dad for 8 years, and i treated him just like a dad and he treated me just like a son. Of all my mothers husbands/fiances/boyfriends he was the one that stands out more clearly in my mind. After about 6 years of marriage i think, they both became very unhappy and had very explosive arguments which really upset me and my sister. I think my sister took it worse because she was younger, but i still really suffered from it. After a couple more years of this they divorced. And actually, even though i thought that would be worse, it really quite relieved me. There were no more arguments between them and although he lived away from home me and my sister could still see him often. We dont speak to him now, though becasue he is in prison, but that timein between was really nice. So out of my experience, i think it is harder when the parents are unhappy. Much harder. x

Answer 5

well, I lived with both my parents till I was 8 when the separated. I think it was harder when they were together and not happy, they would fight all the time and I'd have to hide under my bed, or under the covers to try to sleep, I wasn't happy because they fought all the time. When they got divorced, I got my sleep and I didn't hear any fighting. I saw my dad on weekends and stayed with Mom during the week. It was hard to adjust to, but they were happier without each other, and that made us happy.

Answer 6

My parents stayed together, but my first husband and I were arguing so much, and our son would hear it and he would cry and cry. Poor baby hated it, and now that we are divorced, he is so much happier now.
Children are like sponges. They soak up everything they hear. And for parents that fight and argue is not a happy home for the little ones. It's better to be seperate than together and fighting. You may not see it right away in your child, but it does take it's toll on them. And all you are doing is teaching your child that fighting and arguing is normal. He will most likely do it at school with other kids, and also when he gets older and gets in his own relationship.

Answer 7

divorced. my parents divorced when i was 2 and only saw my dad once after that and i was 12 almost 13. hes now back in my life but its hard. i grew up fine i learned how to be independent. and strong in the face of conflict. i am happily married with a 3 year old son

Answer 8

Definitely an unhappy one.
A divorced family is just like one that with a parent who died earlier. (If you can make a clean break)
Quarelling an family violence are much more negative.

Answer 9

it depends on your situation i guess...my mom and dad got divorced when i was about 8...i was happy about it though....my dad was abusive toward us and my mom and they were always fighting about something (although they did try to keep it so us kids didnt have to hear it all the time) when my mom finally divorced my dad he kinda "ran away" (and most likely yours wont) so he wasnt in the picture anymore...but i was happy about it....i think it was best thing he couldve done for us....after they divorced things went back to normal and we didnt have much worries...if your concerned about it you should talk to your mom about it bc if their unhappiness is making you unhappy thats not good...and they might not have gotten a divorce bc they have children...so talk to your mom or dad about it and find out whats best for everyone

Answer 10

harder when parents are unhappy at least when divorced , they can be civil and appear happy.