What Should I Do?

Question

I've been with my boyfriend for 6 months. Lately he ignores my calls (i know because the answering machine comes on quick) and only answers to tell me he's going to work, he's at his grandmother's house, or he's at his cousins house. At first we would see each other every week then it was every two weeks now we might see each other but we haven't had sex in a month. I think that if he's not gettin it from me it's from someone else. I do know that he does work alot but that doesn't answer why we don't have sex anymore because no one goes from 3 times a week to none in a month. I still want to be with him cuz he was my first but i feel really dumb cuz in the back of my mind a little voice is telling me something is up. I think i'm a good girlfriend i call him at least once a day(he usually won't answer) i won't give him alot of money cuz i think he'll spend it on sum chick but i do let him know i love him and i do anything i can to make him happy so what should i do

what makes it hurt more is that i don't even cheat on him as a matter of fact i've never cheated on anyone. I think of it as you're supposed to treat people how you want to be treated. What was it that I did wrong or what didn't i do? I feel dumb for sittin here cryin over a boy that i put my feelings out to but dosen't really seem to care that . I need a hug

Answer 1

Gurl im going to tell u that he is cheating and u need to get over him he might be the one for u because u keep believe he is ur first love but first love most of them are the ones that teach u about boyfriends after u let him know what to expect from them .But gurl move on and u will always love him and he will reliaze verything thats going on and talk to him.Leave messages on his phone till he get the picture but be careful and dont stalk him.

Answer 2

You said that "a little voice is telling you something is up" and that "I don't give him alot of money because I think he'll spend it on some chick". Those two statements right there should tell you what's what.

If he's dodging your calls, not calling you, and not having sex, then he's more than likely seeing another girl. Usually a guy will not call you and all the rest but when it comes down to sex, they will still do that with you if that's all they want. It seems like he's not trying to use you for sex (which is good, because if he's having it with someone else do you really want to sleep behind another girl?) but he's more than likely seeing someone but just hasn't broken it off with you yet. He may be waiting to see if you eventually dump him so he won't have to do it.

I'm sorry about this and I know it hurts, but you see all the warning signs and red flags. Trust your gutt, it won't let you down.

Good luck.

Answer 3

He is up to something. He may be: seen someone else, or working on someone he is interested. Could be that he is bored of you. May you both do not give enough space to miss each other. May be you both do everything the together/same"

WEEK1Friday= dinner & movie
WEEK2 Saturday - ice cream & movie
WEEK3 Sunday - park & movie
If so, this reutine has to change. One weekend/dancing/following week:sport activitity,together, biking. Other week at a beach you both haven't been, coffe shop for drinks. Do things you bothhave not done.Can watch a movie at home, maybe some drinks. As how he things are going in regards commucation,space, dressing, entertainment, etc. Let him talk and listen.What would be the things you would change as individuals ? ONCE YOU HAVE LISTEN COMPLETELY, now is your turn to express yourself and let all you doubts, concerns, etc (try not to cry) Nice but firm. I think with all the advice you have receive you'll get an answer. Rather is positive or negative, you are young person

Answer 4

I am sorry to hear you are going though this. It sounds like your boyfriend may want a break from the relationship, but he is too much of a coward to be honest with you, fearful of hurting your feelings by telling you what's on his mind or he may not be sure if he wants things to get more serious.

There may not be another girl involved, but he may just want summer freedom.

Stop giving him money and other things. You are setting yourself up to be used. Let him get a job and earn his own!! Just because gave your virginity to this guy does not mean you are destined to be with him. Most people don't end up marrying their first so don't feel bad about that. Just be more cautious of who you let get close to you the next time.

You have went out of your way to let him know that you still want to be involved with him. So now back off. Find other things to occupy your time instead of thinking about him. Go out with friends, take up new hobbies, go read a few books, and DO NOT call him anymore.

Let him see that you have a life that is not centered around him. If you appear needy that will only turn him off completely.

Make him start chasing you again. When he decides to call you, don't jump at his first offer to spend time with you, make him sweat for a while after he provides a good explanation for being inconsiderate enough to ignore you.

If he never calls you or gives you another flaky excuse for not calling you, then dump his behind and move on.

Give your attention and time to someone worthy of it!!!

Answer 5

I'm so sorry about this, I know how frustrating it must be for you. I know for a fact that some men dont really think about sex, or let's just say dont have time to think about sex when they are working too much. But nevertheless, you should find a way to talk to him, and when I say talk , I mean a real talk. Ask him if there's anything new happening in his life, at work, or anywhere. Tell him how you feel he has been distant for the last few weeks, and ask him if there's a problem you might be able to help him with. I mean, make him feel that you are aware of what's happening, and that you truly care. And if he's honest enough with you and himself, he should tell you what's wrong, is anything.
Good luck.

Answer 6

Girl he is messing with your mind, if he truely cared or loved you he would not be doing this to you... I think you are right, he is up to something and is too scared to tell you the truth in the face. If i were you i betta find out what is up? Rather find out what is happening b4 you hear it from someone else, like a friend of something. Good Luck Girl.

Answer 7

There is something up and thats the bottom line. you might love him but think about what he's doing to you. you deserve someone better. someone that will return your calls, tell you they love you, and try to make some time in there day to be with you. because honey if he loved you as much as you loved him, he would find some way just to call and say hi or i love you and as much as it might hurt you need to find someone better. but talk to him first then take it from there.

Answer 8

wait a minute... did you say you give him MONEY! Why???????? You shouldnt be giving him money. Anyways, back to your question... Talk to him and ask him whats up? It is weird that he doesnt pick, and the sex thing... it doesnt necessarily mean that he is screwing some other chick if he is not having sex with you, maybe the guy has some problems...talk to him.. see whats up! Maybe it's just temporary, maybe he doesn't know how to break up! Good luck to you!

Answer 9

hmm... form an outsiders point of view.. i can only give u some advice of my own.
1) If you really love him then you should start to repackage yourself to him. since there is something wrong with the frequency of your sex life then you should try different ways of having it done. Try to have different styles to attract him and let him come back for more.
2) if all these sacriface you make for him cant work, i am sorry to tell you that he is just no longer interested in you. dump him b4 he hurts you deeper. consider wat u should do carefully. take care.

Answer 10

This is a tough one! Sounds like you really love him but are worried of whats going on behind your back. It doesn't sound like there's alot of trust in your relashionship and i think you guys just aren't ment to be whether u wanna hear that or not. My advice: ask him whats going on, say you're worried and just put it all on the table. what he does is his choice.