When I was married I was mentally bullied and my self-respect was destroyed. I now have another chance.?

Question

Should I risk it? I,m VERY wary and uncertain. I have very bad depression (controlled by meds) because of what I had to put up with.

Answer 1

You need to take some time to heal first. I was also abused and when I divorced I jumped right back in and was divorced again. It took counselling and research to figure out why I was attracted to abusive/neglectful men. The problem is if you don't take the time to figure it out and recover you'll just keep repeating the same process over and over and it really sucks!
Do you have kids? If so, they need time to heal as well. No matter how much we try to shield them they still feel the tension and turmoil and they need stability more than a male role model. Good luck with your recovery.

Answer 2

I'm sorry I don't know what you are asking. what do you think you should risk? Do you mean getting into another relationship? If thats what you meant then I would say no not yet, give yourself time to heal after going through what you went through, you need to build up your self-esteem again and self-confidence and just be happy being on your own for a while. Maybe even get some counselling to help you feel better about yourself and to make sure you NEVER let anyone treat you in that way again. Because lightening does sometimes strike twice. B

Answer 3

Your trust in relationships was destroyed by a mentally abusive man. Trust is a very hard thing to build for all parties I suggest sittin back and learning once again how to appreciate life without feeling the need to jump in another relationship you can do this in many ways counselling, finding things to do socially, or maybe just taking a relaxing holiday. Either way you need to exorcise your demons that make you feel wary. I hope you find it xxxx

Answer 4

Yes you should give it another chance. Do not let the bad experiences your ex put you through create a hindrance to a new relationship. I can defiantly understand your fear and hesitation to enter a new relationship. Just take the relationship slow and let the guy you are with know how you feel about getting into a new relationship. You do not have to tell him every single detail but it is best to let him know, that way if you pull away a little he will understand why and there will not be any communication.

Answer 5

Of course you have another chance, Try meeting new people and think positively...no matter what happens always remember nothing worse than what you already had can happen and God is always there to show you the light at the end of the tunnel, I hope one day you find love and know how to appreciate it and you can then stop taking this medication b/c eventually I you will I know it, smile b/c we have to learn to live in the present...yesterady is gone adn tomorrow we don't even know about yet, ha ha ha SMILE

Answer 6

first of all sorry to hear you was mentally bullied, you need to get over it, if youre week it will happen again, take this as a life lesson, show you have grown up from this experience. dont see it as a risk see itr as a fresh start go into this relationship and be a strong independent woman. take the chance and show everyone you have moved on. good luck to you.

Answer 7

If you mean a chance at love with a different person, go for it. You have nothing to lose by giving the guy a shot. If it doesn't work out, then say bye bye to him and move on. If you mean a second chance with your former turd of a husband, then I would say NO straight off and remind you that leopards never ever change their spots.

Answer 8

true love is out there for you. but be careful. think about all the traits that attracted you to your husband and make sure you don't find a new man that has the same traits, or you could end up with the same kind of man.
we are creatures of habit and we find traits in people we like and are attracted to and tend to keep getting tied up with the same kind of problems.
look hard and long at those traits and just cautious.
the right man is out there for you and he will find you. most likely in the last place you would ever think to look.
good luck to you

Answer 9

If u have a chance with someone new, go for it. I went thru a similar thing with my ex-fiance (we were together for 3 years) and now i'm with the most amazing loving guy.. i told him all the stuff i've been thru and he's so understanding.. i just hope u'll be as lucky as me but u'll never know if u don't go for it! good luck!

Answer 10

i went through the same thing with my ex husband who was a meth addict and physically and mentally abused me. i felt like nothing during our 4 year marriage, he told me i was ugly and slutty looking all the time, he told me he hated me and wished i would die and some nights when he was really high he would hit me, i had black eyes, bruises on my whole body, i was spit on, and even got scratched with one of his needles once when i found out he shot up his dope and tried to take it away from him. i lived in this torture with my child for 4 years and he honestly made me believe i was an ugly person and good for nothing like he told me. once you hear those things for so many years you start to believe them. i had no self confidence and did not leave for a very long time, he even cheated on me and i stayed because i thought i couldn't do any better. anyways i ran into a really good friend one day and he built up my self confidence and convinced me to leave my ex husband. it took a long time for me to feel better about myself and still today the things he said and did go through my head but i know i cannot live my life based on what he did to me, he was just a horrible person. but that confidence will return, just surround yourself with the people that love you and yea give yourself another change but not with the same man b/c they never change-believe me, i know.