i was adopted how do i tell my foster parents that i want to contact my real parents?

Answer 1

That's a serious matter....
See, they understand you, and if you tell them, I'm sure, they will not behave rudely.....
Promise them that after finding your real parents, you'll not strike their name off from the rolls of your heart.

Answer 2

many people want to know who their biological parents were. they may love their foster parents, but have unanswered questions about their real problems. records of adoption are sealed and unless you talk to your foster parents, you will never get anywhere. most kids waiting until they are of age and you might bring it up with your mother in conversation. there isn't a foster parent that doesn't know the day will come when you would like to know about your real parents but all the time letting them know you love them and you will always consider them your parents. you might be surprised at how they will help you. its also possible if you were a baby that you just had a mother who didn't know the father or was a crack baby. in those cases, not even the parents would be able to tell you anything. nowadays its either from a crack baby, severe abuse or a very young girl having a baby and giving it up. i hope the best for you.

Answer 3

First of all, perhaps some different terminology. If you're living with the people who adopted you, they're not your foster parents, they're your "adoptive parents."

And the people who created you are your "birth parents". (I've been through this, and know the term "real parents" can hurt some feelings.)

That being said, just let them know you have something important to tell them. Choose a time when things are calm and they have some time to talk. Let them know you are curious about your birth parents and want to begin a search.

Your adoptive parents may have some mixed feelings. That's natural. You can assure them you don't want to replace them, you just want to know where you came from.

Good luck to you!

Answer 4

If you know your foster parents really love you which you do then tell them I'm sure they will understand. As a matter of fact, they are expecting you to tell them some day because most or all adopted kids are curious about who their real biological parents are.

Answer 5

do they know u already knew ur real parents? and what they reason they adopted u? and what is their reaction when u talk about ur real parents..

if they are ready to accept the fact, u can say u 1 2 contact them. and if u old enough to judge, they would let u do so and what next after the contact

Answer 6

There is really no easy way to say this, so you just gotta say it honestly without making them feel that you are abandoning them(i know you are not but they just might think so), explain what your foster parents mean to you and how important their contribution has been to your life and then tell them why you want to meet your real parents, explain as nicely and coolly as possible. They will understand. Goodluck!

Answer 7

sit down with them and let them know that you appreciate all the love they have given you. let them know that you have become of age where there are certain questions you have that they can not answer which you wish they could because this is a crazy scary time in your life.
say you want to know more about you biological parents and their family. you want to understand your traits, where you get your smile from, your humor, your intelligence. you want to know if you have siblings.
say its not that you want to replace them in any form or fashion you just have this emptiness that needs to be filled and only your biological parents can fill that void. assure them that their place in your heart will never be over shadowed by another they mean to much to you for that.
say you are coming to them because you want them to know how you feel and you would appreciate their assistance on this quest.
Im sure they will understand and as a matter of fact they are probably expecting you to tell them this anyway.
GOOD LUCK SWEETIE.... I WISH YOU THE BEST

Answer 8

I was also adopted. I don't know your family history, but I was always told that I was adopted, that I was special, chosen, blah blah blah. But then when I talked about it w/ friends I was reminded that was personal information not to be discussed w/ anyone outside of the family. Talk about being torn in two directions. I was being told one thing and then punished for believeing in it. When I turned 16, i told my adoptive parents (ap) that i wanted to locate my biological parents (bp). My apmom hit the roof. She said that was something i could do when i was an adult. she reminded me of all that she had done for me. blah blah blah. So i waited until i was 18. i asked my apdad about my adoption. He was a little more easy to confront. he gave the name of the agency of which i was adopted through and then i contacted them directly. i began dealing w/ a the lady that originally placed me. i decided it was best not to mention anything to my apmom unless there was a sure connection made. and there was. so i had to tell my apmom. and my apfamily. no one understood why i would do that.
my main reason for locating my bp was to find out two things:
the infamous questions at the dr's office: Do you or any family member have a history of this.....
and whether or not i had any siblings. of course i wanted to know who i looked like. but all in all, just wanted to know my medical history and if i had any full siblings.
i would start by asking yourself: why do i want to locate my bp?
and then, explain to your fpmom and fpdad your reasoning. reassure them that they are your parents and always will be. that your not doing this to hurt them. that you hope they can support you. and if they can't, you understand it's a lot to ask and come to terms with. but ask them to consider your point of view. you did come from another family. why was i given up? what are they like? it may help you come to terms with some dimensions of your personality. I know for a fact that my personality traits and tendancy's come from my bparents. i am ssooo different from my apfamily. it helped me come to terms with why i was so different from my apfamily. and with time it helped them understand why i was the way i was. and as the years have past, everyone has been able to work through their feelings and see that all i really wanted to know was where i came from, why i was given up, yes i have other siblings, but my apfamily is my family. i still love them, and still choose to be w/ them.

Answer 9

Talk to them about it very very thoroughly. Make sure that you understand this might change your life forever, and that you realize you are opening a new door to your life. You want to convince your parents you are ready and mature enough to make a decsion like this in your life.

And most importantly MAKE SURE YOUR FOSTER PARENTS KNOW THAT YOU LOVE THEM UNCONDITIONALLY AND THANK THEM FOR EVERYTHING THEY HAVE DONE FOR YOU, AND THEY CAN NEVER BE EASILY REPLACED.

Most people make the mistake like I did, and my adoptive parents got hurt in the process, because they thought I didnt need them anymore!

Good luck :o)

Answer 10

properly, now I actual have my personal motor vehicle and that i'm transferring out in lower than a week to bypass to varsity 1400 miles faraway from living house. so it isn't going to ensue. yet even as i became youthful i became confronted with this problem virtually each day. I experienced myself to shuttle lengthy distances on my motorcycle with little water and an truly extreme staying power for warmth. my grandparents owned a house on the sea coast about 5 hours (by technique of motor vehicle, 8-10 by technique of motorcycle) away and that i had a key to that living house... I laid out a plan that if I ever had to get out (my mum and dad were abusive) or if my mum and dad had informed me to get out i'd purely journey to the sea coast living house first, then parent out the position to bypass from there. I actual have acquaintances that stay on the sea coast 365 days round so i ought to have lengthy gone to them for help. I under no circumstances did ought to finish my plans, in spite of the indisputable fact that it got here very close some circumstances.