okay so I'll admitt this finally.. I looked at my mom's text messages and saw that she was on the flirts with some guy.. and she goes out like everynight saying that she's going to her friend Patty's house.. but I know that's not true because I called her friend Patty once while my mom was supposingly at her house and Patty wasn't home... what should I do? Should I tell my dad or should I confront my mom that I know what's going on?
2006-07-19 17:24:12 · 18 answers · asked by ~*VaLkY*~ 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
If u really luv ur mom make a plan to catch her.since u neeed help I'll give u a few plans myself!:)
1.Show the text messages to ur dad and he'll talk 2 her.But when ur mom is not looking and run!!!!!
2.Like whenever ur mom is busy,call Patty to make plans w/ ur mom so that Patty could get some info out of her.
3.After ur mom leaves ask dad if he can follow ur mom and see where she's bin going,by the time u reach the person's house u look inside the window and see what they're doing,and if they are doing something bad barge in and stop them!
4.If the text messages say where they are going then follow them and pretend like u guys are just getting out of the house.
5.Try to spend time w/ ur mom and ask her questions of what she's supposingly doing at Patty's house.
I'm so sorry about what's happening!!! U have to tell ur mom straight about what kind of mother she's being.Tell dad if the situation is getting more serious.Do whatever u can to stop ur mom from being the person she is! I'm sooo sorry!
2006-07-19 18:01:26 · answer #1 · answered by Marstar824 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
What I would do is this: I would get the guys number off the text message and call him and ask him if he is seeing your mom and if he knows that she is married. Tell him that he is an adulterous pervert trying to break up your family. Another thing you could do is to text him a message--pretending to be your mother and tell him that you want to break this off b/c you love your husband and you made a huge mistake. Either way--your mom will get the point and you will find out what you need to know. This should help your mother be more open about this and she will either decide to make a change in her life for the better or the worse.
That is what I would do. I have done something similar when my mom was cheating--I followed and took pictures and other stuff. This will work. Remember--you are not the bad guy here--you are needing answers and you want to live in an honest and good family. Do not let anyone tell you differently or make you feel guilty for doing this. That is your right b/c you are in the family. Good luck!! :)
2006-07-20 00:32:49 · answer #2 · answered by Sage g 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well this is a very serious thing to say the least. If you know for sure, no doubts what so ever, that your mom is cheating on your dad, then yes I would let him that she is doing it. But make very certain that she is doing it. Watch her, where she goes, what she does, just don't make it that obvious. Like if she is going to her friends house, do like you did before and call over there, just make sure that you have a good excuse for calling should her friend answer the phone and you ask for your mom and she is there. If she does answer and she says your mom is not there, you can ask her if she knows where your mom is at. Just keep one thing in mind when you do this, if in fact that she is cheating on your dad and he finds out, if their relationship is not that strong, it could be the end of their marriage. But that is between your mom and dad. You don't even have to tell your dad as far as that goes, you can set her up with your dad so that he will catch her himself if she is cheating on him.
Put your self in their shoes, let's say that you have a boyfriend that you love so much, and he is cheating on you, wouldn't you want to know that he is doing this to you, I sure would.
2006-07-20 00:58:42 · answer #3 · answered by SapphireB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, that's a hard one. Your dad may already suspect, but I'd go with talking to your mom. It's her responsibility to talk to your dad. You don't really know all that is going on so talking to your mom might make you feel better
You probably should not be looking at her text messages though, I'm sure you wouldn't want her to do that to you.
Talking to your dad first might make for problems if he had no idea or you were wrong about what is going on. I hope that you were wrong and it is just a friendship. This will mess up your whole family. God bless.
2006-07-20 00:37:10 · answer #4 · answered by Debi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry about your news but you need to confront your mom. You are a part of that family and as a member your entitled to know what the hell is really up with your mom. If she admits it then give her the chance to tell your dad herself if not then by all means you need to tell him. If she doesn't but you know it to be true tell your dad and see where it goes from there. Hope everything goes well.
2006-07-20 00:32:38 · answer #5 · answered by Gemini23 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you need to know then ask your mom where she goes all the time and her eyes will tell you the answer the eyes can't lie they don't know how. Then you will know. Ask her about the text messages and again the eyes will answer you. She will then be more careful but will continue to carry on. Then take Jonathan c's advice and then confide in a strong and trusting person for support.You will need it Good luck kid. God be with you
2006-07-20 00:42:30 · answer #6 · answered by irishlad 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tough situation! It is NOT your responsibility to fix things between your parents (especially since you do not yet know for certain that your mother is indeed having an affair.) I would recommend that you confront your mother with the information that you have and see what she says. Give her the opportunity to explain herself and to work things out openly and honestly with your father.
If she refuses to do any of this, she either (1) is not having an affair, or (2) does not want to change the situation as it stands. If she is cheating on your father, I would recommend counseling for yourself in order to deal with the emotions that you will likely experience. Again, do not try to fix your mom and dad. Your only responsibility is to take care of yourself!
Take care.
2006-07-20 00:36:41 · answer #7 · answered by seminarygrad 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is what i did. when i was a senior in high school i found out that my mom was having an affair...i got the guys name and number and when i knew my mom was with him, i called and asked to speak with her...he actually put her on the phone and although she was embarrassed it helped for her to know that i knew, because then she faced the fact that what she was doing was wrong and told my dad on her own, they ended up divorcing and she married the guy that she was involved with about 2 years later, and they are still married today...it's been 13 years. all i had to say to her is what are you doing? and the conversation progressed from there, don't go to your dad, you wouldn't want to see the hurt on his face and you are just a kid, you don't need to worry about this, they are adults and will have to make adult decisions, just know that it is not your fault and both of your parents love you and your mom isn't doing this to you and your family she is doing it to herself and she'll have to live the rest of her life with every choice she makes. try to be strong and supportive, your family will need all the strength it can gather.
2006-07-20 00:42:16 · answer #8 · answered by tella stella 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No! You should absolutely NOT tell your dad! I would say that you need to speak with your mom about it when the two of you are alone. Maybe ask her what is going on in their marriage to make her want to seek attention outside of her marriage. There are more than likely some things going on within their marriage that you don't have a clue about. Maybe you could suggest to her that she and your dad should seek marriage counseling or something.
Good luck to you and your family!
2006-07-20 00:34:28 · answer #9 · answered by bettywitdabigbooty 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd like to think you're wrong. But I would think that you could ask your mom about it. I wouldnt mention it to your dad. If it's so, that would be her place to tell him. And, she cudda gone to her friend Patty's house, that nite you called. And they cudda gone someplace together. Dont jump to any conclusions til ya have all the facts. There's an ole saying that is good to live by.
Believe HALF of what you see, and NOTHING of what you hear.
Good luck sweetie! :)
2006-07-20 00:46:13 · answer #10 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋