for camping out
2006-07-19 13:18:23 · 11 answers · asked by cheesepoofer182 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
One day, a father of triplets (2 girls and a boy) is sitting down on his chair and relaxing. One of his daughters comes up to him and asks, "Dad, why'd you and mom call me Rose?" He answered, "'Cause when you were born we dropped a rose on your head."
The next day, his other daughter comes up to him and asks, "Dad, why'd you and mom call me Dandelion?" He answered, "'Cause when you were born, we dropped a dandelion on your head."
The next day, his son comes up to him and says, "Durhhhh!!!!" His dad says, "Shut up Cinderblock!"
2006-07-19 13:21:59 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Q: How do blonde brain cells die ?
A: Alone.
Q: How does a blond spell farm?
A: E-I-E-I-O
Q: What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?
A: Run....she's got a hand grenade in her mouth.
Q: How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?
A: Tell her a joke on Wednesday.
Q: What is the blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears?
A: Trying to hold on to a thought.
Q: Why did the blonde stare at frozen orange juice can for 2 hours?
A: Because it said 'concentrate'.
Q: Why did the blonde bake a chicken for 3 and a half days?
A: It said cook it for half an hour per pound, and she weighed 125.
Q: Why did the blonde put her finger over the nail when she was hammering?
A: The noise gave her a headache.
Q: Why did the blonde climb up to the roof of the bar?
A: She heard that the drinks were on the house.
Q: Why do blondes work seven days a week?
A: So you don't have to retrain them on Monday.
Q: What did the blonde do when she noticed that someone had already written on the overhead transparency?
A: She turned it over and used the other side.
Q: How do blondes pierce their ears?
A: They put tacks in their shoulder pads.
Q: What is every blonde's ambition in life?
A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.
Q: What can you save a dying blonde?
A: Hair transplants.
Q: What are the worst six years in a blonde's life?
A: Third Grade.
Q: Why do blondes hate M&Ms?
A: They're too hard to peel.
Q: How do you know when a blonde has been making chocolate chip cookies?
A: You find M&M shells all over the kitchen floor.
Q: What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory?
A: Proofreading.
Q: Do you know why the blonde got fired from the M&M factory?
A: For throwing out the W's.
Q: Why don't blondes like making KOOL-AID?
A: Because they can't fit 8 cups of water in the little packet.
Q: How do you keep a blonde in suspense?
A: (I'll tell you tomorrow.)
Q: How do you keep a blonde busy?
A: Write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper.
Q: How does the blonde car pool work?
A: They all meet at work at 7:45.
Q: What happens when a blonde gets Alzheimers disease?
A: Her IQ goes up!
Q: Why can't blondes make ice cubes?
A: They always forget the recipe.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde who just bought an A.M. radio?
A: It took her two weeks to figure out that you could play it at night.
Q: Did you hear about the blond that was treated at the emergency room for a concussion and severe head wounds?
A: She tried to commit suicide by hanging herself with a bungie cord.
Q: Did you hear bout the blonde who couldn't wait to see "20,000 Leagues Under The Sea"?
A: She said that she loved baseball, and was surprised that there were so many teams.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde who stood in front of a mirror with her eyes closed?
A: She wanted to see what she looked like asleep.
Q: Why did the blonde keep ice cubes in the freezer?
A: So she could keep the refrigerator cold.
Q: How did the blonde break her leg playing hockey with the Toronto Maple Leafs?
A: She fell out of the tree.
2006-07-19 20:35:14 · answer #2 · answered by ideaquest 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
---Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench
Talking........ And one blonde says to the other, "Which do
You think is farther away..........Florida or the moon?"
The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can
You see Florida...?????"
---A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!" The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!"
The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook th! eir heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said The Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"
---A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two
New dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one was named Timex.
Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?"
"HELLLOOOOOOO......," answered the blond. "They're
Watch dogs!"
---A brunete was standing on the side of the road Waving her arms and saying "38,38" over and over.
A blonde pulls up beside her and starts to watch her then says "Why are you doing that?"
The brunete replies "It's good exercise you should try it"
So the blonde does and then says "U know this is good execise and it's fun"
The brunete then says "It's more fun in the road" So the blonde goes out in the road and starts waving her arms and yelling.
'BAM'
The blonde gets run over and the brunete then once again starts waving her arms and say's "39,39"
2006-07-19 20:35:26 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Read your own question, thats a joke in itself,
you NED
and STORYS
NED = need
STORYS= stories,
lololol your funny
2006-07-19 20:27:24 · answer #4 · answered by Moose 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Computer Programmer and The Frog
A computer programmer happens across a frog as he was walking down a road.
The frog pipes up, "I'm really a beautiful princess and if you kiss me, I'll stay with you for a week".
The programmer shrugs his shoulders and puts the frog in his pocket.
A few minutes later, the frog says "OK, OK, if you kiss me, I'll give you great sex for a week".
The programmer nods and puts the frog back in his pocket.
A few minutes later, "Turn me back into a princess and I'll give you great sex for a whole year!".
The programmer smiles and walks on.
Finally, the frog says, "What's wrong with you? I've promised you great sex for a year from a beautiful princess and you won't even kiss a frog?"
"I'm a programmer," he replies. "I don't have time for sex....but a talking frog is pretty cool."
2006-07-20 02:11:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A man dies,and goes to Heaven where God has granted him permission to ask three questions that will be answered. The man thinks for a minute,and says"God why did you make women so beautiful?" God replies "So you would lthem,and continue to populate the world." Theman then asks "Why did you make them so soft?" God gives him the same answer. Getting nowhere the man asks " Then why would you make them so stupid?" God says "So they would put up with you."
2006-07-19 20:29:38 · answer #6 · answered by Jimmythekid 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whats the difference between your mom and a preztel? A preztel has never had my nutts on it's chin...Thats from my 18 yr old son...He dared me to type it...HA! I did
2006-07-19 20:24:31 · answer #7 · answered by sweet_thing_kay04 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
*two blonde walk into a building ouch!!!
*two blonde walking to disneyland and there was a sign saying disneyland left so they went home!!!
2006-07-19 20:22:38 · answer #8 · answered by smallz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i keep hearing a little girl screamming .oh no it's me and the little voice is saying i've dropped my crack pipe and can't pick it up.oh no it's me,it's me again.
2006-07-19 20:27:02 · answer #9 · answered by sugar 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what does "ned" mean?
2006-07-19 20:20:59 · answer #10 · answered by taco 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋