How long does it take before your best friend is being a jerk by avoiding you on the day of and after your birthday when they could call, write, send an email, hop in for coffee, et cetera - all with relative ease?
(OR, how long do you have to say 'happy birthday' to your best friend before you've missed your chance?)
2006-07-19 12:59:30 · 25 answers · asked by Steven John 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
The day after my birthday (yesterday), I emailed my best friend and joked about them forgetting it, I left them a voice mail, and have tried calling them since and they still have not so much as tried to contact me (no missed phonecalls or anything like that).
She has traditionally made a big deal out of my birthday and I always made a big deal out of her birthday, until my birthday this year.
2006-07-19 13:34:06 · update #1
Better late than never. I'll listen for the reason (before deciding whether he's a jerk or not).
Within a week.
2006-07-19 13:02:55 · answer #1 · answered by ginandvodka 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, there may be a reason why your friend hasn't even thought of it. So, to think s/he is a jerk before even finding out what may be going on in their life may be a little harsh.
Considering you're asking about them avoiding you and not calling or whatever - it seems like you haven't talked to them either. Perhaps rather than you waiting and coming off spoiled, you should be the bigger person (if - in fact - there is nothing wrong), and give your friend a call. They may need your shoulder more than you need them to say "Happy Birthday".
2006-07-19 13:05:14 · answer #2 · answered by Madame Gato 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your best friend should be saying 'happy birthday' either the very second they see you or when they phone you later in the day, if they have work or something. It's just common courtesy to wish your friend a happy birthday and there is something selfish if they do have access to phone, email, etc and can't be bothered.
2006-07-19 13:04:27 · answer #3 · answered by starchilde5 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, people get distracted sometimes. I think it would be foolish to let something like this drive a wedge between you and your friend, especially because she doesn't know that she did anything that bothered you. Just get over it and continue enjoying your wonderful friendship. Next time you forget something she'll understand.
If your friend isn't answering calls, perhaps something is going on that is making her life hard right now. You could be a good friend by trying to help her out and not worrying about your feelings.
2006-07-19 16:59:24 · answer #4 · answered by drshorty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Much as I hate to admit it, I've missed my best friend's birthday. And many other peoples' birthdays. Basically, unless something/someone reminds me of the day, it totally slips my mind. Your friend is probably not a jerk, he simply forgot. Maybe he has a lot going on right now -- perhaps you should just jog his memory!
2006-07-19 13:04:32 · answer #5 · answered by Bunny*Run 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My old best friend never wished me Happy Birthday towards the end of our friendship. That just shows they don't care enough about you. And looking back on that friendship, it's clear that I was always a better friend to her than she was to me.
You have to say Happy Birthday on their birthday, unless you genuinly forgot, in which case apologize up and down for forgetting as soon as you realize it.
2006-07-19 13:06:49 · answer #6 · answered by animal_mother 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand how that can really be annoying, but some people are just idiots and cannot remember a birthday if it saved their life. Also, some people were raised in a home that birthdays are not as big of a deal as in your family. If they're worth it to you, or if your friendship is worth it to you, then accept that...even tho it hurts ....and SUCKS!
2006-07-19 13:06:50 · answer #7 · answered by amber 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get over it. Some people are bad with dates.
Invite your friend out to celebrate with you and move on. Being bad with remembering birthdays doesn't make a best friend a jerk, or less caring than those who DO remember.
2006-07-19 13:05:43 · answer #8 · answered by tehabwa 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is your best friend you should always give him the benifit of any matter. He may have forgotten and you know that is easy enough to do. When you tell him/her they will tell you "Happy Birthday" and prob omg I'm so sorry! So hear ya go "Happy Birthday" I'll say it for them...omg I'm so sorry!... feel better now...go eat your cake.
2006-07-19 13:07:52 · answer #9 · answered by starduster2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes people just forget. It may not seem cool,. but it happens. It is something that you have to live with. I don't really think it is worth getting mad over. If you think they are avoiding you on purpose that is a whole different story.
However, my first instint tells me to believe that they simply forgot. If you feel it is important for them to know, politely bring up the subject.
2006-07-19 13:06:01 · answer #10 · answered by Erin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋