How can I get my four year old daughter to tell me about her day?

Question

Whenever my daughter goes somewhere (to church or swim lessons for example), we try to get her to tell us about what she did there. She doesn't like to tell us. What can we do to get her to open up? She starts preschool in Sept. and I'd like her to come home and tell us about it.

Answer 1

I have taught preschool for over 12 years and have parent ask me the same question! It's really common for children at that age to "live in the moment." Once they transition to the next thing, they forget what happened before because now they are taking in new information.

You have to ask her more involved question rather than "What did you do today?" I bet if you ask her that her response is usually "Nothing" or "I don't know." Ask her more direct questions to prompt her memory like "What color dress was "Mrs. Smith" wearing?" or "Did you put your face under the water? What did you think about that?"

Because so many parents in my classroom wanted to know the same things, I post everyday what we learned about in circle so the parents could ask their child question regarding that. The parents love it and say it really helps.

When your daughter starts school, try and ask her more direct questions regarding her day. "Who shared today?" "Did you play on the swing or in the sandbox?" "What was for snack?...". Hopefully the school will take a class picture. It will help her to talk more about the children in her class. Hope this helps! Good luck!

Answer 2

I work in daycares and have found that if you ask one answer questions the answer will always be yes. Instead of asking "how was your day?" tell your child to tell something they didn't like about swimming or church and then something they did like. You and your husband can also do this with each other so your child learns to differentiate between good and bad.

Answer 3

You have to ask the right questions. Instead of "How was your day?"..too vague a concept for a child this age...you have to be more specific...and ask very specific questions..."Show me how you swim" or "Did you see your friend at church, today?" Children are very literal minded and anything that is open-ended confuses them. Once you get them talking, you find out all kinds of good stuff. I hope this helps.

Answer 4

i used to have this problem with my son he would tell me he didn't do anything at school. So eventually i started joking around saying if he wasn't doing anything in school i was going to have to call the school and tell them they need a new teacher because his teacher didn't do anything. then he would giggle and tell me something they did. I also make it a habit that when he comes in from the bus the first thing i ask is how was your day.

Answer 5

Speaking from experience, my mom would never speak to me or seemed to care about my day when I was little. So when she started to be concerned and wanted to talk, I was already in the habit of not talking to her, and was even aggravated when she wanted to. So, if there were not any "talk sessions" before, it may be an on going battle trying to get her to talk period. But since she is so young, you can wear her down. Just always emphasize that she can always talk to you or tell you about anything.

Answer 6

Try telling her about your day in a way she can understand. She will enjoy hearing you talk about your day, and will be more apt to open up if you go first. Be expressive and make it as interesting as possible using adjectives about the type of people you saw.

Answer 7

I have to tell you ... my son is 7 years old and I have that same problem.. he has been through kindergarten and in the first grade I didn't know anything about his day and i worked at his school too and i still didn't know what was going on in his Lil world.. unless I ask the teacher he never told me and I don't know why..... maybe cuz i want it to bad and he knows that...

Answer 8

Have you tried going on walks?? There actually has been research that says walking causes your brain to ...cant think of the word....it helps with verbal and thinking process...maybe you can start with your day first and see if she will follow.... but dont push it because she would more than likely never want to be open.

Answer 9

Ask her very specific questions and throw in some silly ones to make her laugh - "Was there an elephant at swimming today?" Also talk to her while playing a game - another way to make her relaxed.

Answer 10

attempt putting your self in her position. She lives including her grandma even as her brother lives with you. and look at yet another toddler coming who will also finally end up living with you... yet she doesn't. She's feeling rejected by technique of you. She doens't understand why she has to stay with Grandma even as right here siblings get to stay with you. In her suggestions you've despatched her away. She's jealous of her brother. It sounds like you don't understand her o.k. and doubtless do not spend a lot one on one time including her to make her experience particular both. you pick to bypass on some mommy daughter dates and carry out somewhat issues that women do. bypass draw close out on the mall together and get your hair and nails finished together. bypass see a movie together. bypass out to devour together. even as she's with you the way a lot time to do spend sitting on the floor and taking area in including her? Do you study to her? How a lot time are you actual spending including her doing some thing together? purely answer those questions for your self, i do not pick the solutions. you pick to make her experience that you're making an investment attempt and time into her existence. today it doesn't look like she's getting absolutely everyone interest. it should be she's being fed undesirable ideas from Grandma or individuals as to why she's no longer with you. you pick to finish somewhat investigating and locate out what else is going on in her existence.