Lately, when I have had to go #2, It come out with such force that it actually propels me off the toilet seat, causing feces to splatter everywhere. Not to mention I hit the head on the wall every liftoff. Whats wrong with me and how can I stop this?
2006-07-19 08:50:51 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Other - Health
Get a seat belt and strap yourself to that throne sister!!! Ha haaaaaaa that made me laugh, I almost pooped! Lay off the bean dip, get some Charmin, and maybe you can adhere some suction cups to your a-s-s for extra support!
2006-07-19 08:53:49 · answer #1 · answered by somechick25 5 · 5⤊ 2⤋
By now, you should know drinking those flaming shooters made with rocket fuel and Drambuie would come back to bite you in "the end." What I've done in similar circumstances is create a cockpit around the toilee with an ejection capsule. This way, after a particularly explosive bowel movement, I am simply flung through my retractable sun roof, and glide lazily to the ground.
Now, maybe you can help me with a problem. How do you remove nasty perchlorate-based skid-marks from parachute silk?
Thanks for the help.
2006-07-19 16:03:20 · answer #2 · answered by Elwood Blues 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dang, they beat me to the seatbelt idea....
Strap a pillow to your head or move the wall or ceiling.
Put layers of plastic wrap on the walls so you can peel them off and throw them away- or else just tile the bathroom and clean it off every time.
A little more fiber in your diet may actually break things down a little better so you aren't acting as a projectile weapon. That IS reinforced porcelin you've got right? If not, it could crack leading to costly repairs.
I'm so sorry you're going through this problem- it must be rough (no PUn intended, of course). I hope my answer was helpful and that the loving members of the Answers community contribute even more helpful answers to help you!
2006-07-19 15:57:49 · answer #3 · answered by Falcon_01 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my practice, constipation and irritable bowel syndrome often accompanies low back
and radicular pain. Forceful bowel movements can aggravate or cause fissures,
hemorrhoids. Most common is the pain produced during bowel movements in patients with
radiculopathy or low back pain because of the increased intradiscal and valsalva
pressures.
I also treat many patients with irritable bowel syndrome, constipation, diverticulitis, Crohn's
disease, fissures, hemorrhoids, or diarrhea who are greatly relieved by the sedation of
aloe vera, peppermint, and flax seed fiber added to the stool. It also is synergistic with
lactobacillus acidophilus in implanting the colon flora.
2006-07-19 16:22:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Report to NASA.
Could be an answer for the shuttle problems.
Or is this DB thing?
Definitely stay away from Taco Bell
2006-07-19 15:58:36 · answer #5 · answered by beedaduck 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try changing your diet so that you won't have to go so bad. Also, you could go as soon as you feel the urge, so that you won't have a lot of poop ready to exit, building up pressure.
I don't know whether to be disgusted, amused, or turned on by your question.
2006-07-19 16:03:49 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe your anus is swollen or something, you might have an en-larged vein on the inside of your anus also. Go to a doctor if it gets really bad, until then bite your tounge and take it like a man!
2006-07-19 15:55:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a bigger toilet and get inside of it.
I think you are been just funny.
But if you are true, just watch what you are eating. Eat more crackers. Stay away from milk.
2006-07-19 15:57:08 · answer #8 · answered by Evy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the Beefeaters and 151 could be the problem
2006-07-20 00:50:14 · answer #9 · answered by hopflower 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Eat one banana a day
2006-07-19 15:58:48 · answer #10 · answered by goodnatured007 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋