During an argument, I asked my boyfriend if we should break up. He said, "probably because you deserve more"

Question

when I said "stop it, are you being serious?" He responded, "yes, you deserve better than me, I don't like to make you upset. you deserve someone who can give you more." I responded with, "what? why don't you let me decide if you're not giving me enough? then I asked, "are you trying to push me away again?" He said, "yes, that's what I do, that's how I am." I said "stop it, I'm not going anywhere right now," He said, "okay, I guess we're okay." Then we worked it out. Do you think this is truly what he means or do you think he really means that he doesn't want to be with me? Any ideas?? ( I am really confused..)

I'm confused because he is the one who initiates calls/dates, etc..so his actions don't match his words. He shows that he wants to be with me, but says things like that too. I guess it is my fault for bringing it up, maybe it's me with the problem..I always think the worst!!! UGH!!

Answer 1

Thats just him being harsh. We all say things we dont mean when we are pissed off. I have said the same stuff many times. Mostly we are hoping to make you feel bad for us!

Answer 2

I don't know why you are confused. He said exactly what he meant. By him saying you are too good for him, he doesn't give you want you deserve, he's really wanting to break up but doesn't want to say "I want to break up". Some people just can be the person to break up with the other. The fact that you said "again" to his pushing you away should trigger the fact that he really does want to break up. When someone breaks it off everytime you argue, thats a warning sign. Everyone argues from time to time, but to break up over an argument, you'd have to wonder how strong your relationship really is. It's going to end eventually, either now or later. But more than likely it's going to end bad, with you hating each other. The writting is on the wall now, why not stop and read it?

Answer 3

I could never imagine me telling a guy he deserves better than me. Can you ? I think if those words come out of someones mouth you should listen. If they themselves can say you deserve better than you most likely do. He also seems to be big on not taking responsibility by saying hey, that's what I do, that's how I am. So what in the hell is that supposed to mean ? Your just going to have to deal with him pushing you away forever ? Too much drama.

Answer 4

He probably answered the question the way he thought you wanted it answered. Remember this was an argument and mean things are said during an argument. But you still need to keep your guard up for a breakup because true love is hard to push away that easily.

Answer 5

It sounds to me like this could one of two things.

He may really feel that he is not deserving of your love and affection, which means he has self esteem/self security issues. OR - he may be manipulating you, knowing that you dont want to end the relationship, but saying things to you in an attempt to reach a reaction/conclusion, that he already planned in his mind.

Think about this: Do you want to be with someone who thinks so little of himself that he comments to you that he doesnt deserve you?

Answer 6

He's doing one of two things. He's either testing you to see how badly you want to be with him by pushing you away, or he really IS pushing you away. Look at other things like whether or not he makes an effort to call/see you, how he treats you, if he shows that he really likes you, etc. to determine which message he's trying to get across. (He also might just be really insecure. Keep that in mind)

Answer 7

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Answer 8

i been there b4 and it was me saying "u deserve better" i was just being truthfull and letting him know i am not the one for him and that he can find somone that will treat him better that i can or want to right now. sounds like thats what he wants but he also cares about u thats why hes telling u the truth.u may wanna ask him if hes happy or wants to be bye himself.

Answer 9

Hey sweetie, you should not ever talk about stuf like taht during an argument. its OK to fight and to learn and to grow, that happens in arguments.

arguments are healthy and normal, dont question your relationship because you have a fight.

just keep it healty

dont bring up topics like that, keep the fightin above the belt and you will be fine

Answer 10

One he wants to hear your response. Just to see where your head is at...for comfort. PLAYING HEAD GAMES. I just got a relationship just like that. He was going through a divorce thou. I came to a conclusion. I did deserve better. Someone that really loves me like i love him. No questiones asked....love comes natural...you know what your mind is telling you.. go with it...that is the best. I know it is hard. but, {if its to be it's up to me}...tell yourself that..