I would be stupid to move out at this point, because I need my boyfriend, he is very good person, generous and mature, and I need a good man figure for my 6 yr. old son. My boyfriend is 19 years older than me but we get along great, he is very responsible what I appreciate a lot. The situation is complicated, he has three children from his previous marriage and I don't like that at all, I am not sure if he would be a good partner for the future. Even though I don't want to move out yet, the live in situation is bothering me, it's hard for me to deal with it.
2006-07-19 04:03:08 · 8 answers · asked by nazyk6 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
his children don't live with us.
2006-07-19 04:46:23 · update #1
Jesus christ...
So not only are you screwing up your life, you're screwing up your 6 year old son's too???
Great.
If you are too weak to move out for you - for goodness sake, do it for your son! You think a "live in shack up" bf is a role model?
PLEASE!
If you are trying to get reassurance you're doing the right thing, go bark up another tree, because there is no way a small kid should be put in that position because you're too weak to deal with a problem - what are you teaching him??
And how is he going to feel when you eventually leave this situation??? Wow...you just took away his father figure. lol
Way to go mom.
2006-07-19 04:08:41 · answer #1 · answered by Nightwish 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you don't want to move out right now because you have no other living conditions. If that is the only reason then your cutting him short to be realistic. I am sure you are new to idea of having three other children in the house but he is sacrificing somethings also by taking in you and your son. If it isn't a compormisable situation then you should end it quickly to keep any further discomfort for you and your child as well as him and his
2006-07-19 11:07:30 · answer #2 · answered by dmxdragon2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to really sit down and think about the situation. Write down the pros and cons. See what out weighs what. He sounds like a great guy but I think the situation may be too much for you. Since you can't stand the living arrangement, you have to move. It's what's best for you and your son. I can tell you from experience that a child can sense when their parent is unhappy no matter what we do to hide it. They start to act out. You want to avoid this from happening. I think you should address the issues with your bf about what's bothering you and see if you can work it out, if not, you must move on.
2006-07-19 11:39:15 · answer #3 · answered by Boss' n it 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess the question is: do you love this man? If you don't, do him a favor and move on. Do the kids live with him? It's really unfair to children (yours included) to be involved in a relationship that's not equal to marriage. Kids learn by observing your own behavior. I think you need to take your child and be on your own till you figure this out. Don't use the man, for God's Sake....that is low. Work things out before you move back with anyone else....a comittment is nice....you don't want to drag every boyfriend into your life with a kid. It's unhealthy. Good Luck.
2006-07-19 11:07:31 · answer #4 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop using him and stand on your own two feet. What are you teaching your child if you stay just because he helps you? Sounds to me like you found a winner and you need to at least treat him with the decency of not using him because he has been so good to you and your son. Furthermore, you knew that he had children from his marriage and you continued to deal with him because you knew that he would take care of you and your son. That is a shame what you are doing to this man and he is only being a real man.
2006-07-19 11:08:44 · answer #5 · answered by Nicole C 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are no different from the man. Both of you have pleasantness problem and your tolerance levels are low. The same reason he could not cope with his former marriage is the reason why you can't marry the father of your son. Now you are not comfortable with his kids.
You may have to consider your choices before moving out, otherwise you'll be worse off.
2006-07-19 11:09:29 · answer #6 · answered by Sage_Learner 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
find a good man b4 u leave this guy. else u will have no one.
2006-07-19 11:05:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you love him? That is where the answer lies.
2006-07-19 11:27:52 · answer #8 · answered by mjcrzy1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋