I was supposed to visit this weekend. He still wants to see me but afterwards he wants to "date other people". I want to go but I think it will probably hurt, badly. I would like to see him one last time as well. Is closure real? Does it help?
2006-07-18 22:36:56 · 11 answers · asked by Tell it like it is 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
sometimes it's best to avoid someone after a recent breakup, it will only make it harder to move on.
2006-07-18 22:50:18 · answer #1 · answered by JOHN R 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My heart breaks for you... Six months ago, the guy I was seeing ended our relationship with no explanation. He became very distant and just stopped calling. Till today, I wonder what I did wrong or what are the reasons. I still love him and wish I could hold him for one last time. As painful as that may be, I would at least have been able to properly say goodbye and put closure to our relationship. If he's wanting to see you, I would suggest you take him up on this offer. This may be the last time for you to tell him how you feel and at the least get an explanation for what he is feeling. It will probably hurt a whole lot, but it certainly will allow you to move on sooner. Good luck!
2006-07-19 14:17:46 · answer #2 · answered by justme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The same thing happened to me a year ago. we were supposed to move in together. I didnt see him for a long time, and tried to move on...but I couldnt. I believe you need to see someone to get over them. because a year on, hes dating other people, Im still wrapped up on him. and am still moving near him in feb!
Closure can be good in some instances. like ending on a good note. But also it can keep your hopes up..
I think it would also depend on how he dealt with things.
I will wish you luck in whatever decision you make.
But for me. I wish I had have watched him grow, and seen him with other people right from the start...would have made it more of a reality.
xx
2006-07-18 23:12:45 · answer #3 · answered by El 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ouch! This sucks! I have been in two very long distance relationships and one broke up LONG after we got together and the other is with the great love of my life and now I live with him. Our distance was 7000 miles apart so it was very expensive to visit him. I think I would have been devastated if he told me he wanted to see other people after I spent 1500 bucks to fly to see him...
I don't get guys who say, come on out and we will be friends but I want to date others, yeah right...real friends would consider your feelings and wouldn't want to hurt you like that.
It is wrong of him to do that to you. As for closure? Maybe it would help but I think it also might be very painful for you to see him knowing what he said to you. I got closure from my ex and it hurt...bad. I guess I am glad i did it but then I don't know. It is painful to love someone and know they don't feel the same. I hope you can get your closure somehow and move on to someone who can love you as much as you love him. You deserve that much!
Take Care and Good Luck!
2006-07-18 22:46:19 · answer #4 · answered by felisuncia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nah girl forget closure. that when someone dies. he led u on to belive u to had future and then boom he decides its over. thats messed up no. he broke up with u and wants one more night of sex and he dont deserve it and then u will feel used. so just tell him no. he hurt u and this will only hurt more. u were planning to move there and all and what was he thinking the whole time. so if u want go c him but u will only come back used and hurt. better to just try to move on. go out with the girls and try to have fun. so no closure just say goodby and then thats that. belive me i know what im talking bout. let him go. hes just going to hurt u one last time. sorry didnt work but hey there others guy. all in time u watch. good luck
2006-07-18 22:47:54 · answer #5 · answered by SLICK 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, closure is real. It will hurt but you might never forgive yourself for not going. Whatever you do, just be yourself and don't try any emotional tricks on him. He will be eternally grateful to you for that if his reason for ending it is really his own weakness in not being able to cope with a long-distance relationship.
2006-07-18 22:41:53 · answer #6 · answered by Owlwings 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO you will just hurt worse if you go!! Your heart already knows this: don't let him talk you into doing something that goes against what your heart is saying. You don't deserve that! Put your own feelings first and move on now...you already have your closure...let him go!
2006-07-18 22:41:07 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your boyfriend either got bored with the arrangement, or he met someone else he's interested in while you were away. I suggest you let it go and move on ... everything happens for a reason, and one day you'll back at this and understand.
2006-07-18 22:51:24 · answer #8 · answered by TCBgirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand you wanting to go...do you really think that is in your best interest?...you know seeing him will hurt you...you know he's only using you...why put yourself thru that?
2006-07-18 22:53:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
forget it, unless you enjoy spending a weekend crying and begging.
2006-07-18 22:43:53 · answer #10 · answered by leadbelly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋