I keep having these problems dealing with my girls past. She been wit a guy for a few years and i been with her for a year. I keep hearin about things she done already. She say she feels bad about it, and she doesn't even remember how many times she had sex with her previous bf. But she tells me, "I swear i haven't enjoyed none of those times she done it with him" cuz from what i learned, he's a complete jerk. But HOW??? If you don't enjoy something, u certainly don't continue to do it.... I'm confused... Cuz i honestly believe she doesn't tell me the truth about it, even if i told her. I just want a good relationship because i truly love her, but every once in a while, i find something new out that she "done" before. It makes me wanna go kill the dude who did this ti her.... Just offer me some suggestions on how to deal with this.... Anyone can help.
2006-07-18 21:13:08 · 5 answers · asked by Monster 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You definitely need to let go of her past. So she made some mistakes with her previous boyfriend. Who's with her now? YOU. Everyone has a skeleton in their closet. I'm sure yourpast has some things that would upset your girl, but you guys can't hold on to the past. What's done is done, there's no going back. You've got her now. Even though you may be angry with the guy who's "done" things with her, now it's your time. Forget about the mistakes she made. From personal experience, I had a guy once who got extremely jealous about my previous boyfriends, and it drove me insane. Eventually, I dumped him, because I just couldn't take it anymore. If you keep on harping on your girlfriend's past, she may get upset and dump you, eventually. I know sometimes it's hard to think about previous relationships your girl had without getting angry and homicidal (haha), but you just need to let go, because you're with her now, and if your relationship is strong enough nothing and nobody can pull you apart besides yourselves.
2006-07-18 21:23:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 10⤊ 0⤋
You have to forgive her for her past. She is with YOU now, and it sounds like she realizes her mistakes. By being her boyfriend you make a committment to care for her right NOW for who she is, not what she has done. You are going to really hurt her if you bring it up or make her feel bad, and you may miss out on someone who can really make you happy. You should be proud that you are dating someone who has changed their life for the better. Most of us have done things that we wouldn't want our new relationship partners to know about, its just that not all of us are honest enough to admit what we've done, and sometimes its other people that make our past known. Just remember, if you are her boyfriend then you are on her side. If you totally can't get over it then you need to let her go. I hope you make the best decision for yourself and decide whether or not you can look beyond her past, or if you cannot, and then follow through.
2006-07-19 04:18:37 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't keep dwelling on the past. It was her life before you-
At the same time, maybe you could say that you don't want to hear about any more of her past...Live in the NOW, Work on the NOW
2006-07-19 04:22:30 · answer #3 · answered by Tell it like it is 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you've done Well to be honest i cant blame you but i think you should just let her know that maybe its okay to hold things back past is past neither one of you should be asking r talking about the past relationships let alone about the intimate things
2006-07-19 04:23:48 · answer #4 · answered by Dodgerchik 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
look to the future, not the past.
she is with you now, because you are better for her.
2006-07-19 04:17:56 · answer #5 · answered by leadbelly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋