So my boyfriend claims that he shares my same beliefs, but he never goes to church with me and we never talk about it, so I don't know what to do and I don't know how to bring it up. My faith is such a huge important part of my life and I think that it could really like ruin our relationship if we don't agree on what we believe. any ideas?
2006-07-18
17:57:36
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16 answers
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asked by
AmandaJanuary
2
in
Family & Relationships
➔ Singles & Dating
Well we talked about it when we first started dating, and he told me twice he wanted to get involved with going back to church and stuff. My biggest dilema is that I don't know how to bring it up to make it sound casual......i don't want to tell him "we need to talk" and i don't know how to stress how important it is, without going all girly and emotional. I am nervous about this and it seems like it's never a good time to bring it up.
2006-07-18
18:10:37 ·
update #1
It is wonderful that your faith is so important you. A relationship with God is the most essential thing about being alive, and it the love we receive from him is more amazing then any other love in the world. You need to talk about this with him. Don't be afraid to bring it up. Never be ashamed to talk about the Lord, only good can come out of it. If he is offended by you talking about it, then that is ok, but most likely he just really needs to hear it, and God will work the rest out. Talk about it, talk about it, talk about it, because when you realize that you belong to God, you give your life over to him, and it becomes the most important thing, and rightly so. You should never hide this, and you will bless other by talking about the truth, and God will bless you as well for loving him so much.
2006-07-18 20:19:49
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answer #1
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answered by Anonymous
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If you really want to know where his faith is ask him this. Have you ever read Daniel 3 or what is the main expression that was made in 1john chapter4. If he does not know either. ask him if he wants to read either one of those chapters. If he still does not then ask him if you and him can read this verse together. Ephesian 2:8-9 For by grace you have been saved through faith not of yourselves its a gift of God. Not of works lest anyone should boast. If he still avoids the reading that question. Ask him if you do many things for people. Have him do something for someone that is not an easy task. Someone other than you. That you know really needs the the help. If he does a very good Job and gloats in the glory. Then does not give any of the glory of what he has just done for free to God. Another thing you can do is tell him. That I would like to have prayer for an hour each night. But pick the time slot during one of his favorite TV shows. Because any person with faith would very easily give up a favorite TV show to spend time with the almighty God. I know I would.
2006-07-18 18:11:04
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answer #2
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answered by lovely soul with insite 3
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My fiance and I still kind of have this problem. She's a bit more religious than I, but she was raised with it. I've been going to church for a little over a year now, and only after meeting her. I find that I'm not very comfortable talking about my faith with anyone at all, really. With her, I'm afraid that I'm going to fall short of her hopes for me and my faith. I know she's very far ahead of me, and I like to think that as long as I can keep the truth of that distance quiet, it won't matter. Maybe this is the way he feels.
To get him talking about it ... subtle questions will probably only get you subtle answers. I'd say to keep asking him if he'd like to go to church with you - give him a new chance to say yes each week. Other than that ... you've got to go heart to heart on this one. Find a moment, place, time, whatever it is that comes when you guys are really close and talking. Tell him it's important, again. Be direct, be brave ... good luck, best wishes.
2006-07-18 18:25:33
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answer #3
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answered by Gabi'sMan 2
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Obviously your b/f does not share your beliefs if your faith is a huge part of your life and he doesn't go to church and won't talk about his beliefs with you. My faith is a huge part of my life and to be with someone who doesn't share your beliefs doesn't work.
The Bible says to not be unequally yoked and that is what it is talking about. It will be a constant source of friction.
I suspect the reason he won't talk about his beliefs is because
he doesn't want to lose you as a g/f. Also, that the reason you are reluctant to bring it up is because you suspect what he says about his beliefs is not true.
This is a hard part of life. I don't know how old you are or whether
you are looking at him as someone you might want to eventually marry. Maybe if you talk to him and explain how important your faith is to you he will be willing to deepen his own faith if he has any. I don't think marriage is possible with someone of different
religious beliefs if yours are important to you.
God bless you and don't forget to ask God to help you with this.
Our Father loves you very much and wants what is best for you and what will make you the happiest in the long run.
2006-07-18 18:23:03
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answer #4
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answered by Smartassawhip 7
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No---it is no longer ok. The Bible tells Christians to no longer be unequally yoked, that's yet differently of asserting, "do no longer marry unbelievers." Now i understand you're actually not speaking approximately marriage, yet you may desire to realize that throughout the destiny once you do get married, it is going to likely be to somebody which you have been relationship. while you're interior the habit of relationship non-Christian adult men, you will in all possibility finally end up marrying a non-Christian---it is only the way existence works. Any Christian who can circulate with the aid of with changing to a distinctive perception equipment, in all possibility wasn't somewhat a Christian at first. everyone who converts to Christianity so as that it is "criminal" to be jointly is changing for all the incorrect motives, and it will finally replace into glaring. From the Biblical perspective, being unequally yoked potential that the two one among you would be pulling in distinctive instructions in existence. Relationships are complicated adequate whilst the two one among you're on the comparable internet site, yet once you place 2 distinctive gadgets of ideals and values jointly it makes existence depressing for the two human beings. so as a prepare, you may desire to pick a date as you may a mate.
2016-11-02 08:00:31
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answer #5
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answered by ? 4
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If he doesn't want to talk about it, chances are he is just telling you those things to get you to like him. Ask him to pray, or go to youth group with you --that is when his true colors will come out!!! I agree religion is a HUGE part of married life and it can create problems!!
2006-07-18 18:00:27
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answer #6
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answered by jiffypop88 4
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It is very important if it is a huge part of your life and you
should talk to him and if he doesn't share your beliefs, you'll have to make that choice, you can't force him to
have the same beliefs, if he doesn't then in time it will create a problem.
2006-07-18 18:21:14
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answer #7
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answered by frustrated 3
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depending on his age and yours he might just be telling you what he feels you want to hear. put your faith first and tell him its important to you and you would like to spend one night a week studding the bible, or discussing religion.
if he doesn't want to or wont his faith isn't as strong as yours but if his love for you is strong he will do as you ask.
most importantly is walk the talk if you are going to talk about God and tell others about God i hope you are doing Gods will every day.
most important commandment is to love your neighbor as yourself
the world would be a much better place if people just treated each other as they themselves want to be treated
Good luck and God bless
2006-07-18 18:05:27
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answer #8
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answered by eaglerock60 3
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Its best to bring up these questions before you go out with someone. bring it up in conversation... during a walk or something.
2006-07-18 18:00:09
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answer #9
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answered by Anonymous
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err..just do what you believe in your faith and hope maybe someday ur boyfriend will realize the importance and pay more attention to those stuffs
2006-07-18 18:03:17
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answer #10
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answered by ybs 2
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