she has been depressed for years due to her sickness and health and family..we have been together for 6 months and it has been great but also very hard for me to cope with her moods..i have never cried so much b4 but have also never had this much fun wit any1 either..i love her to bits but is she destroying me and my life,bringing me down with her?? please help i cant stand this pain and need advice..! thanks!!
2006-07-18 16:32:44 · 13 answers · asked by mel p 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You have to give her an ultimatum. See a doctor and get treatment, or else. Give her some time to decide, though.
Make sure she understands that this is because you want to stay with her.
2006-07-18 16:35:42 · answer #1 · answered by Otis F 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Gezz people have a heart you can't just leave someone alone if they are needing you. and having some problems.
and Mel if you really truly love her... Then stick with her. it sounds like she needs you. along with a good doctor and the "Right" kind of medication... so do your own research online and make sure she's diagnosed right. (if she's already takeing meds for her depression)
Just don't go down with her though if you're in the same boat you have to help it stay afloat.... you got to open the sails and start moving away from the whirlpool.
And you can do that by making her "Happy" you have to do what you can for her.
Take her out, make special days for you and her, tell her how much you love her, hold her, show her the best love you possibly can, and ask her how you can do that. ask her what makes her depressed.... Talk helps, and sometimes enough of it on a regular basis is all it really takes.
You yourself though have to be okay too emotionally, ( 2 wrongs don't make a right ) so don't let her bring you down all the time with her.... or you'll never go anywhere and get out of the slump.
If she's the downer you have to be the upper..... and if you can achieve that she will have the support she needs and eventually be the one to make you happy in the end when you finally put smiles on her face and light back in her eyes
Just stay strong.... but don't let your life be totally ruined from the whole thing and don't let yourself break from the situation.
And if you have the one you love and the one that loves you ask yourself is your life really so ruined?
Just do what you know is right and what you feel you should do... and keep her in mind and most of all yourself to. and in time the answers will come to you.
2006-07-18 17:23:57 · answer #2 · answered by Jayrowme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, first of all just reading that you've been with her for 6 months so far and love her that much already tells me she's a winner and a very lucky woman.
Second, if it helps you in any way, don't feel alone in this situation. There are so many couples dealing with the same problem. My husband during the last two years has suffered from these depression episodes (thank God not due to any sickness). Fortunately they do not last very long, but I try to be with him most of the time , make him feel supported, tell him that he's not alone, that we love him, that there's nothing we could do without him, and something very important...... physical contact (very tight hugs and all the kisses that you can give do wonders). Another thing, and excuse me for asking, have you tried talking to GOD? Both of you? He always gives the right answer. Trust me.
2006-07-18 17:15:59 · answer #3 · answered by silviux 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OKay the most important thing you can do is to understand that she does not choose to be depressed but she can choose to get better. If she has had a sad and or tragic event in her life her depression is very normal. Depressing things make us feel depressed. Just like happy events make us feel happy.
Depression can be like a big dark cloud that moves across her mind anf life without any or very little warning. She does not deserve to be depressed. She does not choose to be depressed.
For her to overcome the depression there are many natural things she can do to help heal herself.
1) Get a very good counsellor
2) Eat a wide range of food make sure there are lots of fresh fruit and vegies
3) eat vitamin B rich foods.
4) drink lots of water
5) exercise every single day
6) be out in the sunlight every single day
7) start a journal or diary to record her feelings and thoughts
8) every day find one positive quote, saying or proverb to carry around in her thoughts
9) create or follow a hobby of interest to her
10) meditate, pray, or contemplate.
2006-07-22 02:05:58 · answer #4 · answered by wollemi_pine_writer 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really feel a connection with her, hold on. I know that this may be hard for you; but it's even harder for her. You may be doing wonders for her. Try not to let her ups and downs get you down. The last thing she needs is for you to possibly leave her. Love is hard, No one said this was going to be easy.
It takes a strong man to stay and work through this. Help her. She needs you. You may also need her. Be patient. "Rome wasn't built in a day." Good Luck and best wishes!
2006-07-18 16:44:07 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all she needs a full pschychiatric evaluation and assessment about the severity and immediate dangers. As she will needs a sound support system you must find out if you have the willingness, skills, energy, patienceand understanding to commit to it. Try to be supportive. Listen carefully and as much as you can. Good luck and take care.
2006-07-18 16:41:38 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In addition to ensuring that your girlfriend gets the necessary therapy and treatment that she needs, you also need to find the support that you need.
Check the Internet or yellow pages for depression support groups or look for a therapist yourself to help you cope with dealing with a person struggling with such a debilitating disease.
2006-07-18 16:39:55 · answer #7 · answered by LewAR26502 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't sound like you love her that much.
you need to do her a favor and leave so she can FIND a REAL MAN.
My wife's had it for years plus she hears and see's things and people that ain't real.she wouldn't be able to cope without me.I am her strength.She lost two kids one was murdered and the other was killed in a car she was driving.her dad also hung his self right in front of her so,I think I know how to handle a woman with "depression"
2006-07-18 16:42:50 · answer #8 · answered by jgmafb 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you really love her, and if that's the case than I would suggest finding some one you can vent to when she goes off in one of her moods.. i have alot chronic pain and family issues.. My husband usually gets the brunt of it. Talk to her when she is in one of her good moods and tell her you really have fun with but when she switch's moods on you its extremely painful for you. Tell her you have to take off for a walk just so you don't react to her moods, because it is about her issues it really isn't you.. I really highly suggest as I said talk to her when shes in a good space about how you feel and options for you when shes in a bad space.. good luck :)
2006-07-18 16:39:25 · answer #9 · answered by Kat (with wisdom under her hat) 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get her to a doctor and get her on some medicine. You may need some as well for a little while. Also try to get her to see a therapist.
2006-07-18 16:36:41 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋