Why are people collaborating if this only leads to divorce? Why is it becoming such a big trend?

Question

I have been wondering about this for a long time,, I was taking a Psychology class called Marriage and Family Relations. I remember my professor who was also a psychologist tell our class that the majority of people who collaborate before marriage end up being divorced. If this is true that collaborating with your significant other only leads to divorce then why are so many people collaborating? I mean I know so many people who are doing it. I know people who are collabortaing in their twenties and I know people who are collabortaing in their late thirties. Is it really true that collabortaing with your significant other leads to divorce the majority of the time? If so, then why is it such a big trend in our society today?

When I mean collaborating, I mean cohabiting sorry about the spelling mistake.

Answer 1

Sociologists claim that there is no correlation between cohabitation and divorce and that it is simply a question of time. Apparently the majority of intimate relationships end within five years of beginning and it doesn't matter if the couple cohabitates, marries, or maintains individual households. Thus, the reason the majority of people who cohabitate before marriage end up divorced is because most intimate relationships, without regard for residential status, end within five years.

There is a correlation between the number of prior "significant" intimate relationships and the length of marriage. Apparently, 2 or 3 "practice" relationships makes someone a better partner when they decide to make a commitment.

Cohabitation has only become a legitimate option for the last 2 generations, as has divorce. Prior to that our poor grandparents could not have imagined a woman living independently of her family or her husband. When they did decide to marry our grandparents had to remain married or risk terrible social stigma even when their marriage was cold or filled with abuse and irresponsibility. Of course the men could have affairs, which made things easier for them but must have had devestating consequences for other family members.

Cohabitation results because women are considered independent beings capable of supporting themselves and making their own choices and intimate relations outside of marriage are not socially stigmatized.

Answer 2

I'm currently cohabiting with my boyfriend and I'm told by many friends that we are making a huge mistake and will someday get divorced. I don't believe a word of it. I don't think a successful marriage depends only on the variable of "cohabitation." It's much more complicated than that. We plan on getting married once I finish my last semester of college. We are committed, and although I look forward to the marriage ceremony, I don't see how that will change how I feel about him or how committed I am to him... it's a ceremony that happens in one day... relationships take longer than that. Cohabitation gives serious couples that time. Now, for people who were never serious in the first place, why shouldn't they divorce later? It's all in the mindset, and the factor of living together isn't going to change that mindset imo. I also included a link to a great article that talks about why the current statistics linking cohabitation with divorce may not be as accurate as previously thought.

Answer 3

It is the expectations. People get to know someone, and then they expect something different after going through a ceremony. In truth it makes no difference. It just seems worse because if you live with someone for 5 years you think you would know them. Besides, most people today seem to be getting married for reasons of personal gain and not really for love.

Answer 4

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Answer 5

Co-habitating is like a practice run. Bottom line, you can not practice commitment.