Is suicide the answer?

Question

I'm 13 yrs. old. I have been depressed for a very long time and I have been suicidal for almost 2 years. I've been in the hospital 3 times and now my brother is going to Iraq. All my friends hate me and i'm tired of living. Should I kill myslef?

Answer 1

it's tough to see beyond the cruelty of the daily teenage life. did you know that these are of the most painful years - and each decision you make is supposed to be difficult? It does get more challenging, but you learn as you grow older that each challenge helps you grow stronger.

it's hard to tell you to not sweat the small stuff because it's not small to you. i can completely understand your feelings towards your brothers upcoming leave to Iraq. Anyone in your situation would feel very upset and scared.

These "friends" you speak of - well sweety, it's difficult for anyone but you to define what the word "friend" means. If they're treating you less than you want to be treated, and if they're being mean to you - then no, they aren't (in my opinion) friends.

Though life right now seems like a race for popularity - who you hang out with, what you wear and how much money you have ... these things actually are only as important as you make them.

You must decide what is important to you... what a friend is to you... and spend some time finding your inner strength.

I want to tell you that life gets better -- it will, if you make it that way... but for now, while you're completely surrounded by negative feelings like killing yourself -- you MUST get help. You MUST talk to someone who will take your word seriously and bring you to a professional who will take your word seriously. An Aunt? A grandmother? A sister, a cousin?? Even your doctor. Please don't waste another day wondering if this is the answer --- it isn't. You are so young.

Imagine if you were a mom, and your daughter was contemplating taking her own life. How would that make you feel, if you found her lifeless? Wouldn't you wish that she had come to you for help?

- my best to you.. and prayers also.
(((HUG)))

Answer 2

I'm 47 and have thought a lot about suicide over the years. I think it first started around your age, alittle younger.
I've really come to believe that no, it is not an answer. It does not help in any way and only makes matters really ugly.
You are just at the beginning of becoming an adult. And honestly, there's a lot of trial and error. And that's way okay. In fact, that's the best.
If your "friends" hate you.... they're not your friends. Always an important thing to know. Friends come and go. That really is the way it goes. Because we're always changing, we don't always relate to the same people. But anyone worth you spending your time with has to think you're pretty great. Otherwise, hey, sometimes we don't have a whole lot of friends.
More importantly, what are you doing for yourself. It's really important that you (and only you can do this) eat really well (eat breakfast! eat protein (nuts, meats), get out and get some exercise (even a 15 min walk can do wonders) and do something to help someone or something that needs help (say hi to all the little kids you see, help an old lady with her yard, take a dog for a walk)
My favorite thing to remember, is that I have the right to a good life (what would that look like to you....and what can you do in that direction) and you never know what tomorrow will bring. There are always amazing, never expected wonderful things that can unfold.
Don't bother waste your time thinking about how to kill yourself.
Think about how you can make today just alittle better .

Answer 3

No, dear heart. You should not kill yourself. You are very young to have been depressed for such a long time. If you would like to write and talk about it through e-mail that would be fine with me.

I know what it is to feel suicidal. I also know that it is the wrong answer, even though it can feel right.

It sounds like you are very close to your brother. He has more than a good chance of coming back from Iraq just fine. And men have to do what they have to do. It is something women have to learn. Ask him to e-mail you a lot from there, so you won't worry about him so much.

You say nothing of your family situation.

I doubt very much that your friends hate you. They may not know how to handle your depression and that may make it seem that way to you.

Usually when we think others hate us, it's because we are hating ourselves.

I also don't think it is living you are tired of, but feeling the way you do every day. Suicide seems like an escape.

But I have known people who have committed suicide. It is an escape that hurts so very many people around you.

I think it would hurt your brother, and he needs to know you are there for him while he is in Iraq.

I'll be glad just to correspond back and forth if you like. It's not the same as having a friend close by, I know. But maybe because I've fought depression so many years, myself, I do understand a little, and would be glad to listen a lot.

Answer 4

ABSOLUTELY NOT!!! No matter how you feel now, you are worth it to live. You may not think you want to live or that no one cares, but no matter what your family loves you. Suicide not only effects you but think of how your brother would feel if you committed suicide while he was in Iraq-he'd be sad and alone missing you. What about your mom and dad-don't you think they'd miss you?!? I been so depressed for most of my life and one day my mom sat down with and said "there is light after the tunnel" and even though I didn't take her advice then, I sought out professional help 3 years ago, and I feel wonderful. Seeing a professional is nothing to be embarrassed about, actually it's quite brave to say I have a problem I need help. Go to the person you trust the most and tell them what's going on and how you feel-or if nothing else go to the phonebook and look up a psychiatric Dr.
and make the call that can change your life

Answer 5

You are only 13 --- you have so much to look forward to!

If you kill yourself you'll miss:
getting a driver's license
graduating high school
college
getting married
having kids
having a career

Also, your friends and family would miss having you.
You say they hate you but I know they love you enough that it would be a big loss if you were gone. If you don't believe me ask them how they would feel if you were to die/commit suicide.

Most of all God loves you and has awesome plans for you. It would hurt him a lot if you killed yourself.

I encourage you to list all the things you like in your life. Then list what goals you have. Make plans for yourself for the next year, five years, and ten years.

Then look at those plans you have and ask yourself "Do I really want to give all of that up just because life is a little hard?" Of course not. Life is hard, but there is so many good parts to it -- it is worth living. Don't loose out on the good just because its a little tough.

Another thing I recommend, is to do fun things to keep your mind off the depression. Read a good book, spend time with friends (make new friends if you don't like the ones you have) window shop at the mall. Don't just let you mind keep on the "rat wheel" of negative thoughts.

Answer 6

NO!!!!!!!!!!!! I am sorry to hear about your brother. I hope he will be alright. No, suicide is not the answer. I am almost 40 and there people that when we were 13 just like you and now most of them are fine and have wonderful lives. You are going through puberty and sometimes that is hard. I suggest you go and get in some sort of support group with other teens that feel like you do. My son who is 17 suffers from depression also. I don't know if you or your family are Christians, but if you kill yourself you are destined for hell. I will be praying for you.

Answer 7

Suicide is NEVER the answer. 13 is a hard age for anyone - not just you. And if your friends hate you then they are really not your friends. Get involved in things you enjoy - sports, collecting, music, etc.. that way you will be around people who have similar interests as you do.

You need to talk to someone about your feelings - they are not unusual. I'm sure you are feeling like you are the only one in the world who feels like this - you are not!!!

Have you been to the doctor? Are you on any medication?

Life may seem hard now - it probably is - but killing yourself is definitely not the answer!!

Answer 8

My thought is, if you kill yourself you'll only be postponing what you came here to learn when you chose to be born. Whatever your life is dealing out to you is important for you to go through. It's YOUR challenge, it could be HUGE, awful, and extremely sad, but it's uniquely YOURS. And when you start biting off chunks of that mess, day by day, one bite at a time, you grow strong enough to take off the next bite. The more awful it is, the more awsome you will feel as you realize you have dealt with it. First step: decide to survive this. Second step: imagine what it would feel like to say, down the road a bit, "I not only survived that @#%$, I am thriving because of it!!" You picked a big challenge of a lifetime, must be because you have the need to do more than the average dude to be fully alive. I'm proud of you for that, and I know you can get there, one step at a time.

Answer 9

Heck no! Just so you know I have thought about that as few times in my life and just so you know, getting rid of your life won't work. Think about your parents, friends, teachers, relatives, and everyone else in your life that would suffer after the fact that you hated yourself enough to do that, that your parents didn't do a good enough job. DON'T LEAVE YOUR PARENTS WITH THAT GUILT! You should see a therapist and get some medication because wanting to die is just selfish! You should be ashamed! And plus suicide is a sin and you will go to hell!

Answer 10

NO death is the easy way out. You are only 13!!! you have a long life ahead of yourself and people do love you. Just think your brother is going to Iraq to fight for his country he needs your support so he can come back ALIVE!!! he cant be over there thinking about oh my brother just killed himself... if he does he will be up there with you and then you will have heartbroken parents. Don't do it......you will regret it.