when my 3yr old is crying, i feel like I'm going to explode?

Question

what are some ways to calme myself and her down, me and my husbad start yelling at each other cuz we cant controll her sometimes.is it bad to just let her cry in the room while I go outside for a bit??

Answer 1

No, it's not bad at all. As long as there's nothing that can hurt her or nothing she can get into, it's fine to put her in her room and let her cry it out. If she's just crying because she's spoiled and wants attention that's how she NEEDS to be treated.

It's better that you calm yourself down than to act irrationally and do something you may later regret. As long as your daugther is safe for a few minutes, take some alone time to calm down and center yourself.

Good luck!

Answer 2

My son went through the same thing. Do you know why she's crying or is she just crying for no reason? We realized my son was bored out of his skull, so we picked up some pre-school workbooks (with shapes and colors) and we sat down with him for 15 minutes in the morning and again in the afternoon. The tantrums and crying jags all but disappeared. We also got a pre-school computer program and let him play that for 15 minutes or so... it was a Winnie the Pooh program and he still remembers it (he's 6 now)!

We also got some of the Johnson and Johnson lavender bath and I'd put him in a bathseat in the bathtub, just sponging the warm water over him and he'd sometimes call down.

If all else fails, put her in her crib or bedroom and let her cry. It's totally okay. We did that a few times as well, after we'd bounced, sponged, learned, TV'd and everything else. Take a half-hour to take a bath, alone or together. Find a babysitter... maybe she'll respond to a difference face for awhile. Do you have a good friend who can take your daughter for an hour or two so you can go out with your husband?

Remember to take time for your relationship. That is just as important as spending time with your daughter. Happy parents are good parents; unhappy parents are separated parents.

I wish you strength while you find a way that works for you!

Answer 3

I'd rather take a break from the situation than yell and scream at each other until the situation got out of control. This will pass. She is either testing you to see how fast you'll come running to her or she has a genuine problem that needs some immediate attention only you can answer that question. Take her to a pediatrician if you think she may be sick. otherwise just try backing off and giving her some space. let her know that patience is something we all have to learn.

Answer 4

Why is she crying? Is there lots of stimuli like the tv, radio, video, people talking, street noise, whatever? If it makes you edgy then she feels it too and the only way she knows how to react is the basics. She can't change the environment she is in...only grown ups can. Turn down the noise, the lights, the negativity in the house. What makes you relax? Children can feel your anxiety and anger. Check with her Dr. and tell your Dr. how you are feeling. There are lots of remedies. Go outside with her, go for a walk, change of scenery can help. Don't blast loud videos and expect her to chill to them. Don't yell at eachother and expect her not to cry or throw a fit. And get control now, today; it only will get worse as she gets older for all of you. Get some kid stuff (music soft lights, soft colors, etc)and create a chill space for a child. Are all of you getting enough sleep and exercise? you would be surprized how much that helps! And for everyone's sake, don't give a child caffiene and lots of sugar... that's a nitemare waiting to happen.

Answer 5

You can control your emotions since you are not three years old. Take control of the situation.

If she is crying because of a temper tantrum, you need to put her in time out for three minutes (a minute for each year). A place where she can't play, like a stair, or a room without anything she finds fun. Be sure to tell her why she is sitting there, and when the three minutes is up, if she can't calm down, add another three minutes, continue until she calms down.

Answer 6

My 3 year old can drive me bonkers too.

What I end up doing is put him in his room.. make sure he's safe and then step out side to pick weeds or just to pet the dog.

They say about 1 minute per year the kid is, but my son has had a bit longer than that.

If I may.. I'd also sugest to not fight infront of her if she is already yelling.. A lot of times kids will do that for a reaction.. cause and effect sort of thing.

I hope it all works out!

Answer 7

Just realize that EVERYTHING IS OKAY! Its all in your attitude!

NOTHING IS REALLY WRONG! You just think your going to explode, just shake out your arms and shoulders and think how sad your little girl must be. FEEL FOR HER, not yourself. Ask her what is wrong and what you can do for her. If she doesn't know, simply take a parenting class, call around and ask if anyone is giving them, there is no shame in asking, but ALOT of shame in not asking. Why let something go on that could lead to you and your husband being unhappy with each other, when all you have to do is simply pick up the phone and seek help? Also, go to the local library and look up childhood development books, especially for those her age. They have books on all kinds of "development" issues. Only if someone stays in the house with her is it OKAY to go outside, otherwise its abandonment and abuse. Sorry.

Answer 8

She has yours and your husbands number. She doesn't get the right reaction, but she does get some reaction. No, it will probably help both of you, if you go outside and calm down before you lose your temper and strike her in anger. Let her cry, without a reaction from both of you, she will soon learn it doesn't work and maybe you could figure out what she is actually crying about and try to help her with it.

Answer 9

Your children are your and your husband's responsibility to raise with there welfare and welbeing in mind. Be sure that her needs are coming first and that she is not being neglected or abused. She may even feel insecure or need to be entertained. It is not easy to be a parent and if you and your husband are yelling it's a sign that you both are not coping and need to seek professional advice on your relationship and being parents. Never leave your children alone and go out for a bit, this is neglect as it your responsibility to be there for her and monitor her safety. I know I may seem a little hard but being a parent is a responsibility and can be a trying job, and please remember that you can't replace a child like a puppy if something goes wrong!

Answer 10

We have all been there. You are going to have to discipline her. I was like you and I did not want to disciplne hard, so my friend said use a wooden spoon from the kitchen. Like someone when they grow up is going to say " my mama beat me with a wooden spoon) everyone would laugh at them. So I thought it was not that bad to spank them with a wooden spoon. And actually you do not have to do it much to get your point across, because later all you have to do is say I am going to get the wooden spoon or point at her and she will calm down. Your husband and you should be a team and tell each other that you are on each other sides and stick to that, because if you don't it will get worse. And there is nothing wrong with going outside or another room or even the bathroom until you calm down. Don't just give in to your little girls tantrums, because if you do it will get worse as they get older. You need to nip it in the bud now. Children like stability and structure (really) and they will respect you for it. Just relax. OH yeah when they get older like thirteen and you can not spank anymore you can give them sentences to write, or chores. Good luck as parents we have all been there and survived. CAn't help to love them.:) Your family will be better for it.