no more details..they don't seem to take any advice on how to get out of their situation. $5k per month in bills..they own a home...but no jobs... I feel horrible and don't want to get pulled into their blackhole...
2006-07-18 10:34:43 · 11 answers · asked by RUNINTLKT 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I don't expect to get paid back..in fact I said don't pay me back...I guess I should've said.. I gave them money..now they want more
2006-07-18 10:43:14 · update #1
i think you have two choices
1 - you let them see you as a bottomless purse who will bail them out whenever they insist forever and a day without them taking any kind of responsibility for themselves and their outgoings for the rest of your lives
2 - enough is enough - zip! I think being very firm and letting them know that as they still have a large amount outstanding that they OWE YOU that you cant keep bailing them out and in fact WONT do so
2006-07-18 11:11:03 · answer #1 · answered by Aslan 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow, terrible situation... Just be honest, by giving them money, you are not helping them to solve the problem. I've been in a tough financial position myself, so I have sympathy, but the bottom line is you do what you have to do.
I don't know where you are located, but the United Way has debt counselors available to help people come up with a plan to get out of debt. They may recommend them selling the house, since that is a huge financial burden if there is no income.
Good luck!
2006-07-18 10:44:30 · answer #2 · answered by Jenn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It was nice of you to lend them your money, but I hope you don't actually plan on collecting them....
They (whom ever "they" are) in the situation they are in, because they never learned or not willing to manage their own finances. Saving money is very simple. Spend less then you earn.
Since "they" have no jobs, there is zero income. Every expense they incurr, even the most basic one is tipping the balance in the wrong direction.
What you offered them was a temporary remedy. The cause of the problem still exists in full force.
I don't know the situation and I don't know your relationship to them, but you have to either teach them how to solve their own problem, and/or stop lending them money - which I'm afraid, you'll never see again.
You may be afraid of losing "them", but think about it this way.... if you say NO now, you risk a chance of losing them now and never see your money again. If you say NO later, (which they will keep asking unless they learn), you'll be in deeper hole and you'll still lose them.
2006-07-18 10:41:16 · answer #3 · answered by tkquestion 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Then don't. Family is the hardest! They'll someday have to realize on their own that they are in a bad situation and they'll never come to that realization if people like you keep bailing them out.
2006-07-18 10:38:24 · answer #4 · answered by earzee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just say no. Don't help people who won't help themselves. It's not your responsibility to support frown people. If you want to help, circle some "Help Wanted" ads in the paper and give it to them so they can get jobs. "If you give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. If you teach a man to fish, you feed him for life."
2006-07-18 10:48:36 · answer #5 · answered by Lotus 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You'll have to just stop loaning them money. That's the only way they'll ever learn.
2006-07-18 10:38:57 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cut them off. If they can't manage their money, that is their problem. You have tried to help, but they are unwilling to help themself and you can't help people like that!!
2006-07-18 10:38:33 · answer #7 · answered by rockinout 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
to bad no more if l loan money they don't come back which doesn't both Me at all
2006-07-18 10:42:35 · answer #8 · answered by thomas a 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to the police.
2006-07-18 11:06:09 · answer #9 · answered by Balthor 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give Them more & more whenever they ask. Be a good person!
2006-07-18 10:37:53 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋