what should I do?

Question

Ok, me and my mom were going through some old stuff and found two things....a gold bracelet given to my great uncle by his wife and my cousins highschool ring. My dad had stolen these things years ago (he was a druggie and alcoholic) but passed away about 2 years ago.
Now, here's the thing...the bracelet that was given to my great uncle Lonnie (he is now dead also) by his wife Patsy, and the ring is their son Mark. Everyone got along with my uncle Lonnie and I loved him very much but his wife and son not so much. They are very wierd and rude and snobby and nobody in our family has ever got along with them (it was such a mismatched couple).

Anyway, what I'm getting to is should I give the ring and bracelet back to them? They would probably just get mad and not be grateful that there stuff was finally returned. And I also don't want to dishonor my father anymore than I have to. This is tearing me up inside. I want to do the right thing but I don't know what to do. Help please!

Answer 1

you should give them to the family it was giving. your uncle would want that.

Answer 2

well, it depends on what is more important to u and ur mo': either keep those guys (Patsy and Mark) at a distance- in that case u wouldn't give them back their stuff; or if u want to feel good with urself- give the bracelet and ring back and explain how u found them. In both cases your aunt and her son will remain as rude as ever, so it will be no surprise anyway. If i were u i would give it back because how i feel abt myself is more important than "what the others say". This attitude gives the best to me and i don't need to justify everything as long as i know i'm doing the right thing. I would give it back for the respect i had for my uncle and for his memories i have left, not for the family who is now alive. But then again: it is ur choice.

Answer 3

Just my gut talking here. The right thing would probably be to return the items. Granted, the people they are going to aren't very nice, and will probably not appreciate the gesture. Still, I think it is what's "right," even if only by a narrow margin.

As for dishonoring your father, it sounds like these people didn't think very highly of him to start, but perhaps even more important than that, they seem like people whose opinions just don't matter much. They, and what they think, should not play into your decision.

I am sorry for your loss. Try not to let people like Patsy and Mark get you down. My family has a branch like that too.

Answer 4

You might not like these people as much as your uncle, but if you loved your uncle, put aside the feelings you have for these other relatives and let them know that you've discovered these things and offer to return them. You're not dishonoring your father...he stole them, and I'm sure if he had it to do all over again, he'd wished for a better outcome. If you want to honor your father, you'll do the right thing and return them to the proper owner. I think your father would be honored for you to be such a respectful adult.

Answer 5

give the bracelet to the family if you want ,since there was obviously no part in any will to state who it would b passed to tho mabey u should pawn it , see how much you get , then decide who needs or wanted the money more and if you realy need or want it keep it , but geez calling your dead father an alcoholic and a druggy , well thats messed up .

Answer 6

Give it back, you are honoring your father by doing this. It will give them a chance to reconcile any possible misgivings they have about you because of your association with him, which in turn will give you a chance to heal. If he were able to correct his own mistakes before his passing, if he were able to get past the guilt and embarressment of what he had done, wouldn't he have done the right thing. This is your opportunity to do what he may have wished he could have done. If they go off and start saying things like "I should have known" ignore their ignorant butts and go on with your life knowing you gave yourself some peace.

Answer 7

I sure can see where you are tormented.but i feel like after reading this, that you really do want to do the right thing, and i think it would be to return the property to their rightfull owners.I know it won't be easy,wisgh there was a way to return them annonymously, or in a way that you could leave your dad out of it, Alchohol and drugs are a serious disease, and so many people suffer. good luck, wish i could help.

Answer 8

Send it to them anonymously. You never have to admit to sending it to them, and who knows they may thank you!
If you know where the property belongs, then don't dishonor yourself. You will feel so much better after you have done the right thing! Do you know for sure the property was stolen, your Dad held on to it for some reason. He didn't hock it!

Answer 9

You are trying to justify reasons to keep the jewelry when it does not rightfully belong to you. Give it back. Even if the rightful owners don't deserve it, they are still the rightful owners. Don't keep them, because that would be no better than stealing them yourself. You talk about not dishonoring your father, but by keeping them, you dishonor yourselves. Learn from your father's mistakes.

Answer 10

Yes, you should return the items.

If they are hateful and ungrateful, that's their problem.

You don't have to say anything about your father. Just tell them the truth. You were going through some old stuff and found them and thought they would appreciate their return.

Answer 11

Yeah give the ring back. They might see it as a kind gesture and change there tone. Good Luck. Sorry to hear about your dad.