we fight all the time. and we have a 5 month old daughter. i just want us to be able to get along
2006-07-18 05:15:16 · 17 answers · asked by shlee8516 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
you both need to grow up
2006-07-18 05:19:01 · answer #1 · answered by el.tuco 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe you guys should try some counseling. Me and my husband used to fight a lot and really for no reason at all. We decided to go to realationship counseling to save our relationship. Fighting doesn't always mean that your are immature it could just be that either your or him or both of your have some deeper problem that you don't know how to deal with or express in another way. Having an objective person such as a counselor really helps because the person isn't there to take sides and they don't know you and your partner so they will see it from both points of view and beable to give good advice.
Now i'm not saying that the fighting will completely stop because we still have our little arguments but now we know how to work things out better without them turning into big blowouts.
Another suggestion is if you can't afford counseling then go to a local church and tell them your problems and they help for free.
Good Luck.
2006-07-18 12:55:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like both of you need some counseling so you can learn how to communicate in a healthy way...and to find out if the relationship is worth the emotional energy. Fighting all the time isn't good for the baby...eventually it will start taking a toll on her self esteem.
2006-07-18 12:20:36 · answer #3 · answered by darthbouncy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get to the root of the problem, what do you always fight about, is it always the same thing? Sit down and have a civil conversation and don't let it get heated, when people start to get angry and yell, the other person tends to shut you off and not hear much of what you are saying. For the sake of your relationship and for your child, try your hardest to work things out, but if it continues, it may be best to find another alternative, take a break for awhile.
2006-07-18 12:19:59 · answer #4 · answered by pdanielleh 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been going thru the same thing for the last few weeks. We actually sat down the other night and wrote down a list of things that he likes and dislikes about me and, I did the same thing for him. We are now working on these things together and it seems to be working. Instead of saying something hateful to each other in the "heat of an argument", I have learned to walk away for a few minutes and then we talk about what we were getting mad over in the first place!
2006-07-18 12:21:08 · answer #5 · answered by Chas 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You could try counseling first. You might be able to work through it. If not, even though it will be really hard, I'd break up with him. Who do you love more your boyfriend or your daughter? That's a question you'll have to ask. Because believe me it'll be easier on your daughter if you try and work it through now than later, especially if you end up splitting.
2006-07-18 12:20:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I question your assertion that you love him, and I note that you did not declare that he loves you. Love, you see, is patient, kind, and does not envy. It is not self-seeking, or easily angered. Love keeps no record of wrongs, does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails!
Examine your relationship in light of those criteria, and I believe you will conclude, as will he, that the two of you don't currently love each other. Each of you might desire, even lust for each other, but that's not love.
I suspect that as a mother, you love your five-month-old daughter, and tend to transfer those emotions to the man who helped you produce such a wonderful bundle of joy. But she is the very reason, you--yes both of youl--should seriously examine your relationship. Your daughter is innocent. She had no vote in selecting her parents. Therefore, the two of you have no right to burden her life with your drama.
A word to the wise.
Have a nice day
2006-07-18 12:40:44 · answer #7 · answered by mcjordansr 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Learn to compromise. Neither one of you will be able to get what you want all the time. The key is to find a common middle ground that will work for both of you.
2006-07-18 12:19:11 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everyone has to compromise in a working relationship. There are differing opinions that need to be addressed. You need to be able to sit down and in a calm and rational matter discuss these differences. If you find that you are losing your cool leave the room. You also need to be able to see things from his perspective and he needs to see things from yours. Don't let yourself rise to the bait of a screaming contest, it solves nothing. Don't be afraid to express your needs and concerns. If this doesn't work compatibility may need to be addressed.
2006-07-18 12:26:34 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
u should try to find a general idea about what u fight about and discuss what u could do and also you could see a couples conselour or maybe just take a vacation or do something at least once a weak u all love and just talkiing about works!!!
2006-07-18 12:20:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to look at what is causing the fights? And you have to be able to communicate, love is never easy
2006-07-18 12:19:13 · answer #11 · answered by momie_2bee 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋