I just got out of a pretty serious relationship and it's my sr. year of high school and I just want to be me for a while just me not me and my boyfriend is that wrong? All of my friends say I'm being "down on love" whatever that means!!
2006-07-18 04:18:55 · 58 answers · asked by Myrt 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
NOOOOOOOO honey, not at all. You're doing the right thing for SEVERAL reasons...First of all, you need time to heal. Secondly, it's your senior year, you should be free. Get out & enjoy yourself with being tied down to someone. Date different guys, find out what you really want in someone (for the future)...Enjoy being YOU sweetheart and don't let anyone pressure you into having a relationship. I commend you for your outlook, at least you know you don't have to be with someone to be complete. Good for you...
2006-07-18 04:22:18 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
.
Your friends are being ignorant and they are wrong.
YOU are being wise.
You need time. And you need a pencil and paper.
This is the BEST time you will ever have to totally access what you want in a relationship, and what you don't want.
Make two lists like that. Keep the lists in your Bible or Personal journal to review the next time you THINK you are getting serious, because you don't want to
HURT YOURSELF again by getting in deep with someone you don't really want.
Be more careful, going into a relationship...and ONLY give your heart in equal increments to what you are receiving from him.
Below is something I wrote to another questioner that gives you a real good guide to a successful long lasting relationship:
If you want a relationship to be a good one and to last, you have to have way more than lust.
You must BOTH be each others
BEST FRIEND and be
LOYAL and
RESPECT each others differences and needs; and
SHARE and CARE equally with real
BALANCE in the relationship.
In a serious relationship you must be willing to leave (the demon marriage killer) PRIDE alone;
and when there is a problem (and there WILL be)
work lovingly, and without pride to solve the problem.
If you get depressed because the other is not providing something you want, either talk with them to see if you can come to a COMPROMISE; or
STOP WANTING what you can't have.
When you but heads (and you will) BOTH of you must learn how to
AGREE to DISAGREE.
Don't get lazy about flirting with you love, and all good things will follow.
I wish you LOVE that lasts
stw
2006-07-18 04:27:13 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
NOOOOOOOOOO your NOT wrong at all!
YOU ARE RIGHT!
There is absolutly NOTHING wrong with your train of thought, wanting to have *me* time. It does no good to rush into a new relationship too soon after ending one. The ending of ANY relationship is normally painful, and we NEED to take some time alone to deal with it AND LEARN FROM IT.
Ask yourself what went wrong?
what part did you play in the failure of this relationship?
what part did he play in the relationship going bad?
what characteristics did he have that you dislike or are unacceptable? (use this as red flags when the next guy you meet has the same issues)
what could you have done differently?
were you being true to yourself?
The only way to learn and make better choices in future partners is to stop and think, take your time before getting into another relationship.
BRAVO! for you! You are on the RIGHT track!
Tell your silly girlfriends that YOU don't NEED a boyfriend! LOL
and you'll get another one when:
1.You have taken the time to learn from this experience.
2.When you've met someone better than the last one, and he PROVES he deserves to have you as his girlfriend!
Peace :0)
2006-07-18 04:28:29 · answer #3 · answered by 2 cents 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely Not! you are who you are...but sometimes change can be for the "good". I personally think waiting on "Mr.Right" is not lame or clich'e...I never dated in High School, and sometimes my friends arranged blind dates for me and I never went to any of them...because I always knew that a good career, sports and my loving family was always first and was what I would ever really need. Now at age 19, I am into the "Dating Zone" because I feel ready and pumped up to meet this great men...I am in college and I finally went to my first "College Party" and let me tell ya' WAITING is worth it!
See when you date in high school, you are so tired of getting your heart broken all the time that you don't want to talk about men anymore when you reach the age of 19 or mid-twenties...and you also don't feel like experiencing further....AND when you are out of high school waiting to date and have a man is totally worth it....cuz you are 100 percent ready to accept any challenges life might bring your way and you are fully open to possibilities and experience...so with this in mind sista...go on and be yourself...a guy will always be around...but your inner strenght will persevere and kill anything "bad" along your way....SURVIVOR is your new you...so go and dig in...friends won't be around for so long, but a great relationship with your family and boyfriend will change you, benefit you, and remain for a long period of time....ta-ta now!
2006-07-18 04:31:25 · answer #4 · answered by ChikSurfer 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cherish what you have and even if it means being single. Who says being single ain't good at all? Enjoy your singlehood, do the things that make you happy and achieve your goals be it academically or socially. Anyway, it's your senior year, so it's wise of you to not have a relationship and focus on something which is more productive. Never ever give in to your friends' taunts or ridicule just because you choose to be single. If they still continue with this, perhaps it's time to socialise more and make new friends. Remember, nobody can force you to do things that you don't want to.
Take care, girl!
2006-07-18 04:27:56 · answer #5 · answered by serenada 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you realize that you dont' need to be in a relationship it's a sign that you're maturing. There is no need for a high school senior to be in a relationship other than dating. Once you learn about you and what makes you happy all by yourself, then getting serious with someone becomes a real possibility.
2006-07-18 04:22:20 · answer #6 · answered by paintgirl 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I admire your courage to just be by yourself after being with someone for so long it means that you will not get involved for all the wrong reasons and the next relationship you have will be better because you gave yourself time to grow individually and also time to evaluate what went wrong in your last relationship don't study what your friends say only you know whats best for you concentrate on your studies and best of luck
2006-07-18 04:25:23 · answer #7 · answered by playful 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's very healthy to want some time for yourself. If you were to date now, that would just be a relationship on the rebound.You have to get over what you have been through in order to move on whether the relationship was positive or negative. Congratulate yourself. You made an excellent decision and a mature one at that.
2006-07-18 04:25:11 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't do something you aren't ready to do. I wished I wasn't in a relationship my senior year of high school, because then I would have taken college more seriously! Have fun, enjoy your last year, and just work on you...you are growing out of teenagehood and into adulthood, so your priorities are changing. You can't live your life the way your friends think you should do it a certain way. Do what feels right for you!
2006-07-18 04:22:46 · answer #9 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, you better enjoy this free time! You're not down on love, you're up on what you want; and a boyfriend ain't it. I mean...had you two stayed together then you just would've broken up before you went off to school (if college is a part of your plan). In my opinion, you really don't need a boyfriend at your age. there are so many boys out there...why limit yourself to one? the more you date the more you learn about what you want out of a relationship. sounds like your friends depend too much on boys to define them. i'm glad you have a brain of your own.
2006-07-18 04:27:00 · answer #10 · answered by iPROMISE[♥] 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm, I think you got it going on. You are mature. A person does not have to be in a relationship to be happy. At your age, you should be playing the single field for awhile. Too many people think they have to be in a relationship, that isn't a very healthy way to think. Being single strengthens your relationship with yourself, it makes you emotionally stronger and better able to handle those occasional curve balls life throws at you. After all in the end you are the only person you can truly count on. Best of luck!
2006-07-18 04:24:35 · answer #11 · answered by bubba 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋