How important is it to be a stay home mom to teenagers?

Question

I have mostly been a stay-home mom. I have worked a couple times (3 times, for a few months each). Now my kids are older (15, 13, and 11) and I am wondering if they need me that much at home. I don't hear much from stay home mom's of teenagers. I was wondering how much of a positive (and/or negative) it would be for me to continue staying home with them at these ages. I am looking for answers from parents of teens, particularly. Thank you for any help.

Answer 1

I think if you have the resources to stay home that you should. Being a parent of a kid at any age is hard but now that I have three teens (18, 17, 15), it is even harder at this age. Trying to keep them on the straight and narrow when they have their friends to listen to is really hard. I work at a part time job now but I was a stay at home mom up until about a year ago. I just think that it is a good idea for kids to have someone to come home to, i.e a mom or dad. It keeps them out of trouble for the most part and you have a handle on where they are, what they are doing( somewhat, lol). It's really important to keep that part of communication open. We have had a few bumps and bruises a long the way but I think my kids will turn out ok. If you do decide to go back to work, part time is the way to go. The best of both worlds! Oh and have you talked this over with your kids? They may surprise you on their own opinions on the subject.

Answer 2

Children derive much of their healthy "boundaries" from the input their father gives them. If the man of the house is a morally strong and loving man and takes time to teach the children by his actions and his words then they will be less impacted by your decision to work. The 15 year old would probably be OK and the 13 year old might, but the 11 year old is still a very tender age. If you can afford it stay at home I would recommend it. Another alternative is a job during school hours. On the other end of the spectrum, when there is no father present, this can and often does lead to destabilizing hurts of rejection, unforgiveness, and feelings of worthlessness in their lives, then the teenager needs MORE attention not less because they will attempt to fill up what is lacking by embracing drugs, joining gangs, hanging out with the "bad crowd" in search of feelings of identity, belonging and worth that they didn't get from their father. It is important to find a boy in these circumstances a mentor or coach the give them a male reference model to help them work through the pain-full task of growing through adversity.
If your children have had a relatively stable and healthy family life they may be OK with the idea, but I would ask the little one how that would make him feel. Good luck.

Answer 3

Over 25 years of raising children, speaking here. If you can be a stay at home Mom then this is the job for you. Having children is a career. The more work you can put into your family the better the out come for everyone involved will benefit. "Minuteman", said it the best,... with experience, and vengeance! All children need and want (even though they will argue with me on this one) limitations. Mother's who have to work, if they could get paid for raising their children verses their away from home job, 99 percent of them would be stay at home Moms. Its the hardest job you will ever have. Its the worst, best job in the world. But the perks are priceless!!!

Answer 4

My children are 5, 10, 14 and 17 and they would love it if I could stay at home with them. Be there when they get home from school and all. My 14 year old is the one that comments about wanting me to be at home for her. I would say it matters to them even if they don't show it. Good luck.

Answer 5

its probably time you did something for yourself during the day when they are at school. I've recently gone back to college to do a degree my kids are in full time education(7&8 yrs old) and things are so much better for all of us. I have more time/energy to do things with them when they get home because i've had time for myself. I love my kids more than life itself but when i was a single stay at home mum i would sometimes be nippy with them just because i was bored and under stimulated. Its funny as my house is so much cleaner now as well. Im still there for them when they need me

Answer 6

It is important to stay at home. Your children are at an age where they can get exposed to drugs more.

I stayed at home and kids would come to our house to see my daughter, and some were on drugs at that age.

Also, you can oversee what they are doing on the computer.

It's nice to have a mother at home, when they come home from school.

Answer 7

my mom works (i'm 15)
She started working when i was 12 and at first it stunck cuz my little bro(now 14) and i (16 in november) would get home and where was supper? before she started working whe had food on the table waiting for us and she had our favorite show on and now that she works we have to cook our own food we get home at 4:50 and she gets home around 6 and usually she pick something up and we hardly ever eat homeade. just cafeteria food and fast food or like the cooked chicken at h e b with like some packaged potaoe salad or like the "Banquet" packaged meals (the red boxed food)
so please don't work if ur "hun" is bringing in the beacon then don't work . ur kids want u at home well if ya'll have a good relationship (no offense if u don't) like now since my dad hasn't lived with us for the past 3 years there is no one there for us anymore and the family did get distanced since my mom started working. don't work - good luck on ur decision

Answer 8

oh god no, if my mom wouldnt have had a full time job i would have never had a chance to get stoned in my bedroom all the time or screw the 15 year old neighbor girl on the couch in the living room with all the windows and doors open while looking over at her parents house and seeing her dad sitting in the front yard reading his bible, yes thats a true story.