What's the protocol for engagement rings?

Question

How much am I suppossed to spend?
What sort of metals and stones are considered to be standard?
How big a difference will deviation from those standards make?
Am I suppossed to buy one for myself too?

Thanks in advance.

Thanks for the detailed answers!

If you are bitter about marriage, keep it to yourself. That is just trolling.

Answer 1

ok, here's what I have learned...

always buy jewelry WHOLESALE- avoid outlet stores like Crescent, Zales, etc. like the plague. You will save HALF and purchase something which will appraise and be insureable for DOUBLE what you spend. Find someone with a "wholesale license" and they can purchase your ring from a wholesale market, while you are there with them.

Engagement rings typically get worn WITH a womans wedding ring. So try to get a SET that matches. She'll want a stone for her engagement ring-include her in this and you 2 decide how you want both rings to look and what sizes.

I got wife #2 a .83, VSI ring with WONDERFUL fire and clarity. She wanted a "pear shape" and I traded off getting a ONE carat for a .83 of superior quality. Instead of an engagement ring I got her a "ring guard" with 2 much smaller stones in a setting that matched her ring. It looked great, and big. These are the types of trade-offs and decisions you are in for.

Your other questions- gold or platinum, size will be determined by your budget-typically choose at least a 1 carat of decent quality if possible for her main ring. Your budget will determine how big the engagement ring can be- you two talk it over, Typically you can get a great 1 carat at wholesale for about one months salary. When I bought, I spent 3k, for the .83, VSI and setting with the ring guard and stones. This is why you MUST buy wholesale-otherwise you'll go into MAJOR debt to get something pretty at retail price.

get yourself a simple band in a matching metal- husbands'
can always "upgrade" later or use the guilt factor to buy toys with the price difference between hers and yours.

Good luck and get in touch if you want add. info

Answer 2

I've heard anywhere from between 5weeks to 2 months worth of your salary. Deviating from the standards is no big deal, but it will be a big deal if you don't know what she likes. If you think you are ready to get married you should know her well enough by now to know or have heard her say..... I think diamonds are ugly, or that stone is too big or I just love my sisters ring. And know other things like her favorite gem is a ruby or she loves silver not gold.

You could always play it safe and get her a cheaper promissory ring. This way you can see how much she likes what she did get, she will probably be more willing to make suggestions or comments since it's only a promissory ring. And now you will have started the conversation on rings so you can remember to pay attention now and find out what she likes :))

And if you can trust the best friend some people take her to help.
Good Luck

Answer 3

American standards say a 1c. diamond is best. However, this tradition differs from European common standards. You can use any stone that you see as acceptable..a mix of stone is always a nice touch...
The most important thing to consider is..WHAT DOES THE WOMAN WANT.? If you choose to go with something other than a diamond and she wants one you are screwed...
Best ask her what she wants, or take her shopping for a ring and then ask her the question after she's picked out a ring...that way you aren't led by the nose to the most expensive route.. meaning the diamond.

Answer 4

Opinions greatly vary on this. You are definitely not supposed to buy one for yourself -- your fiancee can buy you something if she wants but doesn't have to.

Diamonds are the standard, in gold usually but other metals are also ok. Two months salary is what the diamond companies say you should spend.

How big a difference the deviation makes depends on a) how traditional your prospective bride is, b) how material she is.

I think, personally, it's ok for you to do something cute like give her an empty ring box with a note that says, "I want you to have the perfect ring you've always wanted, so say yes and we'll go pick it out together."

That's not traditional, but it is romantic!

Answer 5

Convention says it should be a diamond, and jewelers will insist that you have white gold. You don't have to wear one - but many women do buy an engagement gift for their fiance. Deviation from standards is perfectly acceptable. I'd accept a large ruby, or even a fake stone from a man I loved. And happy to wear it.

My engagement ring was handed down to my husband from his grandmother, which was really nice. My mother in law made it clear that I could change it in any way I wanted, even sell it and buy another. But I liked the family connection. That was 30 years ago.

Answer 6

Best thing to do is go to a jeweler. They can go over your questions with you & discuss the 4 C's & whatnot. About how much you should spend? You can find beautiful items that are still moderately priced & won't be so much that you will be in debt for the rest of your life. I would try & get a set altogether for her cause then you won't have to worry about the engagement ring AND THEN worry about a wedding band too. As for a ring for yourself? Generally men do not get one of any type but it is possible if you & her decide to do that. It is personal preference.

Answer 7

I really think that it is best to get an idea from your future fiance. My husband and I looked at rings together. Money really isn't important as long as she is getting the ring she wants. My set was about $1600, but I encouraged my hubby to buy the engagement ring when it was on sale, so it ended up being about $1300 instead - She should buy yours once you are engaged and planning the wedding. Good luck! :)

Answer 8

2 months salary is standard (But I didn't spend that much)
I think tiffany setting is classical, but the stone is really up to her. You need to at least have a conversation with you girl friend to find out what she would really like. I have found that most girls have an idea about what they want, and are a little disappointed when they don't get what they wanted.

Answer 9

women all are diverse. even as my daughters boyfriend needed to point he requested us first if it changed into ok, offered the hoop, were given down on one knee and requested her to marry him. She stated certain, took the hoop to the jeweler and had it reset. He changed into damage yet she changed into chuffed. they're nonetheless married. My different daughter picked out her ring after he requested her. She is extremely pleased with it and him. I picked out my ring and am nonetheless pleased with it. Out of 1000's of earrings I picked the single i wanted and am nonetheless wearing it fifty 2 years later. females are humorous. some may rather have a diverse stone than a diamond. no longer many like the smaller diamonds. some like a diverse structure diamond. i imagine that is acceptable to have her %. it out yet you ought to easily bypass paying for mutually (searching) for earrings, say for you mom's birthday and ensue to seem on the engagements earrings to get a experience for what she may like. that is a own component. you may want to seem at earrings on my own also to get an theory of what you get for a way a lot money and set a optimal volume that you may have the funds for. discover out all you could about diamonds so that you comprehend what you're paying for. purchase from a respected jeweler, go away the dep. shops on my own. best of success.

Answer 10

I think jewelers say that the cost of an engagement ring should equal about 4 of your paychecks. Don't go by that - they only say that so they can get rich quicker. My first hubby bought me a ring that cost $200. (and he wonders why we only lasted 5 years!). Seriously, it's all a matter of taste, pick a ring that fits your budget and one you'll know she'll love - hint: if she loves you, she'll love any ring you get...even one from a gumball machine! My present hubby (the one I plan to keep for life) and I didn't exchange rings at all. We know we love each other and that we were meant to spend our lives together - who needs a ring?