2006-07-18 03:10:46 · 31 answers · asked by corkey 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
We will all die one day, our children carry our DNA and memories of us. Move on taking with you what this parent gave you to make you who you are and live the good life given to you. Remember this parents one wish was for you to be happy, so be happy!
2006-07-18 03:25:37 · answer #1 · answered by onespryguy55 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I am very sorry for your loss. When a parent dies, no matter how old or young you are at the time, it shakes the very core of your foundation. When we are hurt, happy, any emotion-we look for mommy or daddy. It is a normal, natural reaction. When my father died, I was 29. The first day, it was my every waking thought. That night, I woke up repeatedly and felt the loss of him being gone. It was my first thought upon waking and my last before sleeping. I would see men on the street that looked like him-if I was in the place I was when it happened, the memory came back. The day of the week reminded me-then the day of the month it occurred. So many things trigger that memory. You never get over it, but the pain does lessen a bit. Now, in the month of March, I usually feel low and depressed and just generally not happy in my skin, but it takes me a little while and then I realize-oh, this is the month Dad died-your body remembers. If you have a memory, remember it. If it makes you laugh, laugh. If it makes you cry, cry. Everyone grieves differently. My thoughts are with you and your family-I hope you find some peace.
2006-07-18 10:17:16 · answer #2 · answered by curiositycat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The person you lose is always with you in spirit. I cant imagine losing a parent but sadly we all will someday. I dont imagine you ever get over the loss but you can take comfort in the memories.
Join a support group in your area maybe with people your age etc going thru the same thing, it will be a long road of emotions and is good for you to have people around that understand the pain.
Possibly there is something you can pursue that they would enjoy knowing you did? (Hobby, career etc.).
Goodluck
2006-07-18 10:18:06 · answer #3 · answered by CheetosRock 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I assume you are saying that someone close to you has died. If this is the case you move on by recognizing that they have not left you at all.
Jesus told us that the kingdom of God is within us. This means that the spirit part of each and every one of us is actually a part of God.
The people who pass on are returning to God. If you think about what this means you realize that they are not leaving us, they are becoming a part of us.
True we have been used to having them around us and we miss the comfort we got from this, but the truth is they are far closer to us now than they ever were when we knew them as s physical human being with a physical body.
You can prove this to yourself if you want. Tonight before you go to sleep relax yourself gently close your eyes and think about a special place that the two of you could meet and talk. On a bench at a park or sitting by a stream in a meadow.
Just think of yourself as sitting there and ask them to come to talk to you for a while. You will be surprised what will happen. They will come as soon as you ask, because their love for you has not changed a bit.
Ask them any thing that you want and listen to the reply. Ask them to tell you something that will help you to believe that you are not just making the whole thing up. Often they will do this, not always, but it happens. Just believe that what you are hearing is real, because it is.
Keep it to your self because well-intentioned friends who have been told that these things are impossible will try to convince you that it is not real. If you let them do this it will sever the connection. Don't allow this to happen because it can be difficult to restore this connection. Not because your loved one is not willing, but because you can't hear what you think is not real. You can continue to speak to your loved one for years this way if you want to.
Remember that your loved one still feels exactly the same love for you as they did when they were with you in the flesh. Love never changes or forgets.
Love and blessings.
don
2006-07-18 10:38:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i lost my dad when i was 16. For a long time I had anxiety attacks whenever I sat still. I miss him a lot still, there are so many questions I want to ask him and things I wish I could talk to him about. But I am ok. I accept that he is gone. Sometimes I still ask him questions and talk to him, the conversations are pretty one sided though. The anxiety attacks stopped a long time ago. Time heals all wounds. I found that having my friends around me really helped. I guess thats my answer, time and friends will help you move on. I will never forget him, but I feel ok with him being gone.
2006-07-18 10:26:07 · answer #5 · answered by sssnole 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's not easy.. but u'll live. we have a saying called "the living stay more than the dead"
well the point is u go through the usual phases of grief, like any loss.. shock, denial, anger, depression, and acceptance.
i lost my father when i was only 11 and he was the only person i cared for in the world, but i didnt lose the world when i lost him. i hope u know what i mean. u're still alive, ur life will change but remember the other people that are alive because they're the people u're living with
2006-07-18 10:20:09 · answer #6 · answered by la_fille_en_blue 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You move on by putting yourself in their shoes. If you were the parent, and your time on Earth was done, what would you want your child to do? Would you want them to be depressed and mourn your passing forever? Or would you want them to say their goodbyes then live their life to the fullest? To think of you occasionally with a smile rather than tears...I know that's what I would want for my children, and I'm sure that's what your parent wants for you.
I'm sorry for your loss and pain, but know that it will get easier with time and that a parent's love extends beyond the grave... you'll carry it with you forever.
2006-07-18 11:26:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A friend of mine husband lost both his parents when he was 18. He was shooting pool near by and he was on his way home to grab a bite when he heard a shot go off. He just thought his dad was drunk and shooting at some animal. When he got to the front door he saw blood everywhere. He stepped in and saw that his mom was dead and his dad too. His dad just went crazy and shot his mom and them himself. I have often pondered how he made it through seeing what he did, but some how he made it. I am sure it took him a long time to get over it, and I know he use to have nightmares on it. In time all things mend. I am sorry for your loss.
2006-07-18 10:19:54 · answer #8 · answered by passme_not 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First I am so very sorry for your loss -- take each day one day at a time - reflect on the memories don't burry them
journaling helps a lot
if you have a spot you can build a memorial for them - small tree with flowers
don't turn to drugs or alcohol to ease your pain cause it doesn't work -- keep focused on the positive
was it your mom or dad? not that it really matters cause a loss is a loss
how old are you?
where and with whom are you living with
you can find support groups at either a local hospital or church
2006-07-18 10:15:36 · answer #9 · answered by brendalee80 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My father died when I was 7. I am currently 30.
I tried to avoid my pain, and swallow it. I don't think I really faced my pain until I was in my twenties.
My best advice is to not avoid how much it hurts. Don't try to be strong, weep and scream and let your feelings out -- otherwise they'll just fester inside you and continue to hurt you for years to come.
We all heal differently, so be patient with yourself.
It'll never go away, but the pain fades and the memories become a beatiful source of strength.
2006-07-18 10:17:36 · answer #10 · answered by maeves_child 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋