My best friend of 10 years , has come to me and said "he is in love with me" and wants a relationship.....Mind you, he has stuck through all my other relationships that didnt work out and sometimes despite the fact he hates the men I have dated..lol...(which makes sense now)
But...............this is it.................
I have this problem with him.....~~~Sometimes I want him and sometimes I dont~~~
i know its not fair to him, to yo-yo him around.....
but how can I get over this feeling
2006-07-18 02:56:43 · 24 answers · asked by privatelynaughty 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
First:
Be honest with him about your feeling, this is most important. Let him know you care about him a lot and because you care about him you want to be honest with him so your not leading him on to false beliefs and hopes.
Second:
takes some time to ask your self who you are and what you want as a lover. It seems like you do have some feeling for him. So try to sort these feelings out. What do you like about him? Do you have a lot in common? Is he attractive? Think about your future if you were with him.
Third:
Realise the fact that it can be akward at first to romantically date a person that you have been friends for so long. But many successful relationships do start that way
Forth:
Experiment. Try to go on a few non committed dates such as to a restoraunt and see what fealings you get out of it.
Fifth:
Don't try to force anything
Six:
Fallow your heart (your inner fealing, it will guide you in the right direction.)
Seven:
Understand the true meaning of love. If together will this relationship run on the rails of love or something different.
My fealing: I feel that this relationship could probably work because you have been friends for so long. Also him being there for you especially during your other relationship with guys he may not of liked shows me a good sighn about the type of guy he is. I have a good feeling about it; again make decisions based on how you feel. Good luck!
2006-07-18 03:04:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Make up your mind. The situation isn't fair to either of you, in the long run someones really gonna get hurt. If it's worth losing a friend, then by all means give it a whirl, if not tell him a relationship between the two of you is never gonna happen.
2006-07-18 10:00:23 · answer #2 · answered by wolcott_boy37 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
relationships are like yo-yo's. that's they way you feel about him and he will feel the same way about you too, so don't take it personal. you two have been with each other for a long time, why not give love a chance?
if you do, keep in mind the yo-yo part for you and him.
2006-07-18 10:04:32 · answer #3 · answered by handydaddy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to figure out how you truly feel. It may take time and you may need to take a break away from him. So tell him that you care about him enough where you won't yo-yo him around. But you need to tell him the truth. Tell him you are confused and that you need to find out how feel about the whole situation.
2006-07-18 10:05:14 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
u r not playing by his feeling .. u r just not sure of urs .. u want him as a bf but u still want him to keep being ur best friend !! thats why u r confused!! u want both a bf that u can share love energy with but still u want the best friend whom stand by u whenever u need him & didn't control u or judge u
u always affried u may lose him too like ur other bf if he became ur bf so in order to protect ur long friendship with him u try to push him ur from ur heart ,, but once u did u feel so needy to feel how it going to be like to be close to him ...
i think u should sit with him and express all those mixed feeling and tell him what u feel ,,, and see what 'll happen
2006-07-18 10:08:06 · answer #5 · answered by Nicholet 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a good friend do the same thing to me. I jsut sat him down and said I love you as a FRIEND and I treasure our friendship and don't want to lose you. You are important to me, but I don't feel the same way about you.
He was tough adn took it like a man. We are now both married to other people, and our friendship hasn't changed at all.
2006-07-18 10:00:46 · answer #6 · answered by KB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give him a chance it might work out because the ones that care the most are the ones that last forever
2006-07-18 10:01:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make a list one of every reason why it would work out .Another of why it wouldn't work out.
then see witch one out ways the other.
But if you really want to find out how much he really wants you . Have him do the same thing and ask for his list so you can con pair it to yours. (but it sounds to me like he's been around you so long & os much he's almost like a brother to you. if so tell him . if you love him
2006-07-18 10:13:00 · answer #8 · answered by K-SOLO 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Imagine someone you like. Someone who is really handsome and kind and funny. Then think of how it feels to say, "I like you" to that person.
Scary, isn't it? You MUST be gentle. He's probably been harboring these feelings for years. We're all afraid to admit we like someone because we're affraid of rejection. That should give you some idea of what you need to do.
2006-07-18 10:06:13 · answer #9 · answered by iambic_chatterbox 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand this. Ok. I know that you are probably thinking well if i did date him then if something and we broke up i would lose my best friend. That is something you should think about and your friend. But the only thing i know to tell you is talk with him about it and the consquences that maybe would follow.
2006-07-18 10:06:28 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋