I do love the guy but I am afraid I will never be the "kind of girl" he wants. He makes me believe I should want what he wants like not going out late at night, etc. I am younger than him-27 Please help!
2006-07-17 22:22:59 · 16 answers · asked by Tell it like it is 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Ummmmmmm easy ....RUN why stay he wont change and you will be abused more...
2006-07-17 22:33:55 · answer #1 · answered by ABBYsMom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
in a word - RUN. This is an abusive relationship - and he is very controlling. You will never find happiness with such a man.
You need to find a man who is willing to trust you and who won't cheat or beat on you or verbally abuse you.
Good for him for giving up the drinking, but he needs a lot of help - if he is willing to seek counseling, then "maybe" but this may take a few years before he stops being so abusive and controlling.
Personally, I think you should move on - you are much too young to wait for this man to get it together.
Good Luck!
2006-07-18 05:26:09 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cheating, beating and verbal abuse... I spose that was all due to drinking? Beware! Things don't stop over night. As for him setting boundaries and telling you what to do? Control freak! If your worried about not going out because of your age, then you are not ready to settle yet and you are awful young. Why not sow your oats before tying yourself down? Live your dreams, not someone elses :)
2006-07-18 05:27:25 · answer #3 · answered by Tainted_Halo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its probably wrong to say its impossible to turn that behaviour around but believe me if hes hit you and abused you physically or verbally it goes allot deeper than just the drinking...he has a real serious problem with both himself and his ability to control himself with you----i would NOT go back into this relationship without first agreeing to get help for BOTH of you----him for his insecurity or whatever it is that makes him not care about abusing you, and you for finding out why it is you are willing to risk your own well being in an abusive relationship when obviously you could look for someone more confident and mature who doesn't need to control someone they are in love with !!!---understand? please use your head here and be very careful---usually once someone has taken the path of abusing someone its really hard to turn it around----blanco
2006-07-18 05:33:56 · answer #4 · answered by blanco 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you used the key word ,afraid. now who wants to be with anyone that you are afraid to be who you are. so once a cheater, beater, and abuser , always one. he got help for the drinking, but what about the abuse? did he get help for that. did he say he' ll never do it again. did he say the famous words im sorry?. well he has to seek help and your wishing it better wont do. dont be in denial and let it keep happening to you. stay out while you are out.
2006-07-18 05:31:42 · answer #5 · answered by eaglestraces123 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Cheating, beating, and verbal abuse."
Once you cross that threshold, it's over. You may think that you can work it out, but it never will. Sorry to say that, but take it from me.
Move on and you both will be much happier. Still being friends is an option, but don't take it further......
2006-07-18 05:25:25 · answer #6 · answered by a1quick57 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
so sure, he can do whatever he wants with you, at you, to you, but you can't go out for a late night with friends. he sounds controlling and volatile. he even tries to blame you for not being 'the kind of girl' he wants.....bullsh*t. when ppl quit drinking or gambling or whatever, quitting the behaviour isn't enough. it's about changing the behaviours associated with the drinking and gambling.....is he willing to do that? ask him.
2006-07-18 05:35:34 · answer #7 · answered by gurrrly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just remember why you left in the first place and see if you want to put yourself in that situation again and if it is worth it and you will have you answer.
2006-07-18 05:25:07 · answer #8 · answered by ^v^ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is one case where the age difference is the problem.
he's ready to settle down, and thinks you should have to as well.
you shouldn't stay in a controlling relationship.
2006-07-18 05:27:40 · answer #9 · answered by leadbelly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if deep down in side, you feel that you cant quit runnin the streets then, NO, your not worth another try........tell him that your not worth it, and to just find a normal girl that aint in to street runnin all hours of the night..
2006-07-18 05:27:19 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
this guy doesnt deserve another chance you need a guy that will treat you with respect and do things that you like not try and tell you to like what he does
2006-07-18 05:31:31 · answer #11 · answered by Yzma 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋