My crush for 8 years said we would never be more than friends then crosses that line? what does it mean?

Question

I have had this crush on this guy for 8 years and he always said i would only ever be a friend to him. Then in september he slept over and crossed that line of being friends he and i got into a make out session? what does this mean and what response should i have. Cause after that weekend i didnt hear from him again till febuary but when he called me for my birthday he ended it with I love u, then i didnt hear from him again for 6 months, is he playing with my head or am i just stupid.

Answer 1

Sorry to hear you are holding out for this loser.He's not even a friend if he goes 6 months without contact. He's USING YOU!!

Answer 2

Actually, he's playing head games with himself.

He obviously knew of the crush, and then either in a moment of weakness, curiosity, or selfishness, decided to get physical with you. He probably even justified it in his mind that he was just giving you what you had always wanted.

Even if he chose this path out of selfishness, he would still feel some guilt, due to the length of your friendship. So on some level, he has regretted doing that to you, but not enough to make it right.

His birthday call was induced by guilt, nothing more. He is hoping for some type of absolution now. Had you had any future with him at all, he would've ramped things up immediately following your make out session.

What you choose to do (scream at him, cry at him, demean him) is up to you at this point. But you won't ever have a successful relationship with this guy.

Answer 3

Here's the thing you need to learn about men: we're not interested in your friendship. Period. We're interested in having sex with you. A boy who tells you "let's just be friends" is telling you that he doesn't want to have sex with you right now, but probably will if the girl he's currently having sex with cuts him off. Thus, he's telling you "I want to be friends with you" in the hope that you will preserve good feelings about him long enough to give it up when he comes around for that.

The single most important thing you can learn as a woman is that YOU are in 100% complete and total control of the one and only thing we want from you. We will pay the price of having conversation, taking you to dinner, meeting your friends, even petting your cat in order to get what we want, but never, never, never mistake that for "friendship."

Relationships absolutely do bloom, and I will tell you that I have been truly and passionately in love a number of times - and I'm happily married today. Those are the women I've been "friends" with, and at the very moment that we were no longer having sex, we weren't friends anymore.

Any man who tells you that he is friends with women is one of these things: a liar, a homosexual, a weakling, or a chump.

Sorry, hon, but it's truly better for you that you know this now while you're young, and that you use it to take control of your life, become confident and strong, and always call the shots. Otherwise, guys like me will come along week after week and leave you bewildered and miserable.

Answer 4

I'm so sorry for you, I know you really like him. But he told you the truth of how he really feels about you. You should move on. The two you finally having sex after 8 years of you trying to make him more than your crush is nothing to feel hopeful about. It took him 8 years to give in to you then he went away. Even if you continue on this path for 8 more years and you finally wear him down; you are still going to be missing something because his heart is not with you like that. He wants someone else and he will keep looking for her until he finds her. He is not playing with your head he does love you but not like you want to be loved. He is use to you. I don't think you are stupid I think you are just determined. But for your good just be happy with you got him to have sex with you and find a guy who really wants you..

Answer 5

I am a guy and was not monogamous in several relationships, unknown to my partners. Sure I was a jerk, fiend, whatever negative term suits. I was being grossly unfair to them, giving them false hope, but the strange thing is I truly loved each one. I since reformed, though not on moral grounds. It's because I've found my soul mate. I guarantee the following. This guy you're seeing
a. is seeing other woman right now
b. no doubt has strong feelings for you, and may even to an extent love you, but does not figure you into his long term plans.

You're not stupid, but he is unhealthy for you. You need to emotionally detach. He certainly has. Good luck.

Answer 6

He loves you as a friend, nothing more nothing less. sometimes people let the "heat of the moment" take control over good since. He was probably embarrassed is why you didn't hear from him in so long. He does love you "As a friend".

Sometimes one of the people involved can not live with that, and if that's you then you may have to loose a friend to save your sanity.

Answer 7

You may hate me for answering you but once u take my advice you would have learned.....He is playing with you.If he loved you he would not take 8yrs to tell you or show u that he did.He told you he loved you because he thought that that was what u wanted to hear and probably didnt want to disappoint you.He wanted to try u out the night he slept over or he wanted to take advantage of the existing opportunity. Wait for him to call again and tell him that what happened that night confirmed to you that you are over him now.If he loves you then at that point or after he will show you that he does.If he doesnt call again he would have learned that he cant and shouldnt mess with your head....

Answer 8

no, RedQueen, now no longer all youthful ones that could be ridiculous, and that i'd honestly no longer damage my self like that, notwithstanding that is like a activity talked about as the choking activity, which claims many children lives crimson Queen: i changed into once only addressing that each are risky and shrink off oxygen to the recommendations. I wasn't attempting to point that you only in many situations going on of both in any comprehend!! Grace and peace :)

Answer 9

You're letting him use you. After 8 years if this is what's happening you need to stop it.....step back and figure out how you got into this mess.....remove him from your thoughts.....go about getting a life for yourself that you deserve and can be proud of.

What kind of person would behave the way he's behaving towards you if he really was your friend?

Answer 10

He is definately playing head games with you.
Since he knows u like him he will think of you as a "booty call". Especially since he goes for such long periods of time without talking to you again. If I were you, I would date other guys and give it time,,if he doesnt respond, then u will know.