Ok, here's the deal. My twin sis and I were adopted together and now that we are going to turn 18 soon, the adoption records will open. My sister wants to finds our birthmother imediately, but I want to wait. We were originally put up for adoption because of our abusive father and neglecting mother. That's why I'm not jumping at the chane for finding her. Unfortunately, since my sister wants to find her immediatly, by law I can't stop her. I am starting to panic because I only have less than five months. Any suggestions?
2006-07-17 12:49:18 · 6 answers · asked by shadedtint 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
why wouldnt you want to know your birth Mother ?
2006-07-17 12:52:43 · answer #1 · answered by 'Cause I'm Blonde 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just because you do not want to meet your birth mother right away doesn't mean your sister has to wait. Your sister by all means should go and meet your birth mother without you. If she must she can explain that you are not ready. Than when you are ready you can go and meet your birth mother in person.
2006-07-17 13:01:12 · answer #2 · answered by butterflykisses427 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let your sister find your birth mother and ask her not to discuss the search or the finding of her with you.
You should meet her yourself, to get the true facts of the reason for adoption and to get your medical family history.
2006-07-17 12:56:31 · answer #3 · answered by older woman 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he signs and indicators away his parental rights, he will no longer be to blame for baby help in maximum states. it truly is plausible for him to go away the state and finally end up no longer paying help in case you don't understand the position he's. My SIL had this ensue with the daddy of her 2d baby. He left the state for a 365 days and did not pay help that entire time. even as he got here decrease back and were given a job his SSN got here up contained in the equipment and now his wages are being garnished. in case you do not already have a help order in position, run do not walk to court to get one so as that it is contained in the equipment.
2016-12-01 19:34:11 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she might be your twin, but she has a life and feelings of her own, and she's going to do what she's going to do, with or without the law, weather anything is getting in her way, or helping her, it sounds like she's set on getting what she wants, and she wants it very badly. let her do what she wants to do, and tell her you will have no part in it, and do not want to have any contact or relations with your parents. they were horrible people then, they are very likely horrible people now, and if they wanted any kind of contact with you two in the past, they would have tried, at least to send you birthday or Christmas cards. they didn't even want to do that. your sister probably understands all this, and just wants to be a part of her parents life. its funny how some people want to be accepted so bad. while it bothered the both of you that your parents could be so harsh, its probably still bothering her, while you've either come to accept your parents are kind of jerks, or its not such a painful thought.
you don't have to be a part of your parents life, regardless of what your twin wants to do. you are your own person, but so is she. respect what she wants in life, and she will respect what you want in return.
2006-07-17 12:58:59 · answer #5 · answered by ASLotaku 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well you can't control what she does, just tell her that you are not interested at this time to find out that information and she needs to keep it to herself and respect your wishes. That's not a whole lot else you can do. It's your choice to meet your birth parents even if you knew who they were so even if she told you the search results, you wouldn't have to meet them.
2006-07-17 12:54:10 · answer #6 · answered by Tina of Lymphland.com 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋