I have been seeing this guy for about a month now. He is wonderful, he's a great father, he's very successful in his career and we have a barrel of laughs together, not too mention an unbelievable sex life. In the beginning he told me that he wasn't looking for a "relationship". I said the same. But the more Im with him the more I realize that I DO WANT a relationship. I cannot imagine him being with someone else, or even myself venturing elsewhere. We talk daily. We text daily.Because we both have full custody of our children we have a limited amount of time to actually be togther. If he goes a night without talking to me he calls and says he really missed talking to me.When we are together he holds me in his arms and tells me how good it feels. He tells that he has never been so comfortable with someone.He gets upset if I leave in the middle of the night, he says just once he'd like to wake up with me N his arms. But he doesn't want a relationship then why is he gettinging upset?
2006-07-17 09:56:54 · 13 answers · asked by HeartsOnFire 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
What you have to realize is that you have only been seeing this man for a month. I'm not saying that things won't work out, because they sound almost perfect. What I'm saying is there is still so much more to know about each other ... still so many things to explore together and talk about.
It seems obvious that he cares about you ... that doesn't mean he is emotionally ready to get back into a committed relationship. Take things for what they are right now and don't push. Keep the lines of communication open as well as your heart.
We tend to start over analyzing things for no reason sometimes and when that starts to happen we are only destine to be wrong in some of our conclusions.
Give your relationship time to grow and develop. Hopefully down the road you will both come to the same conclusion. Always stay true to yourself.
Best of luck to both of you.
2006-07-17 10:11:32 · answer #1 · answered by J 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
He might be feeling the same way like you are and just not telling you differently. Sometimes it takes a guy a few months to catch up with what us women can see the first day. That being said just try to convey to him that you like how you are getting along and what your fears are. One thing I have learned is if you expect too much you will get disappointed but if your honest and set it out there and talk about it at least you can live with yourself to try to get a better relationship out of it. I know without you saying it that you have been burnt and him too. Just clue him in on that fact that we don't have to hurt ourselves if we want more. So good luck with trying to get him to see that he wants more everytime you have to leave.
2006-07-17 10:06:07 · answer #2 · answered by Baby_Doll_f 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We all know what we want and it appears you both hit it off and are able to full fill that which you both missed from your previous relationship, however, in effort to avoid the bad he says he doesn't want to risk ruining such a situation by labeling it a relationship...it is what it is...your already in a relationship...let it evolve naturally so he can realize what a healthy relationship is suppose to become...good luck.
2006-07-17 10:11:24 · answer #3 · answered by Goodspeed 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe when it all started he wasn't ready and felt that he needed to focus of his children. Talk to him about all this, he could have had a change of heart. Sounds like he cares a lot about you or he wouldn't get upset. Talk to him, be honest let him know how you feel. Also be patient and time will tell everything. Good Luck!!!
2006-07-17 10:01:46 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is happy and does not want to rush into this and ruin a good thing.
The old adage haste makes waste kind of applies here.
If you value someone then you dont want to go to fast and crash the relationship.
Just give him a little time then maybe start staying sometime instead of leaving. After a couple weeks or so hint at it and check his response to it. Things might go well for you and I wish you the best of luck.
2006-07-17 10:01:16 · answer #5 · answered by Biker 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't need to be spending the night if there are children in the house....tell him you are uncomfortable with that if indeed you are.
Looking for a relationship or not, you both found something that sounds endearing and sweet. Don't let go of it, let it grow.
2006-07-17 10:00:12 · answer #6 · answered by rrrevils 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well he might be a psycho jealous person but I have a theory that you always find the perfect person when you aren't looking for a relationship! You two have a relationship, face it. It needs to be monogamous if you both have children to support!
2006-07-17 10:02:48 · answer #7 · answered by psycho-cook 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like slowly but surely, things are going to evolve into something more meaningful for both of you. If there is no doubting how he feels about you then give it some time to see what can happen, he'll probably realize that he is ready to commit.
2006-07-17 10:02:51 · answer #8 · answered by Antics 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like a control issue. He doesnt want to have to commit to you just in case something else comes along that he would like to sample. In the meantime, he doesnt' want you getting any extra fries with your burger, so he tells you what you need to hear to stay nice and close to him. I already know what you're going to do so I wont give you any advice. Just know in advance, it wont get any better.
2006-07-17 10:01:57 · answer #9 · answered by Mrs.King 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he likes the relationship the way it is and is not willing or unable to take it to the next level. Patience until it wears away.
2006-07-17 10:00:46 · answer #10 · answered by wondering 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋