My daughter will not go to the bathroom consistently. What do I do?

Question

She will be 3 yrs old in November and some days are better than others when it comes to potty training. I introduced her to panties (she loves Dora the explorer) she did very well for 1 weekend and then she stop asking and started going on herself. I don't want to spank her and scare her from the pot. What should I do. By the way if you can't tell 1st time mother.....

Answer 1

make her drink a lot of water!

Answer 2

Try rewarding her when she does go, and do not let her backtrack into diapers. If need be, put on the underwear then the plastic underwear over top in case of accidents.

I am a teacher in a toddler room, and we deal with this all the time. Lots of encouragement regardless, but praise and reward the positive bathroom behaviour.

Spanking and punishment won't work. She will backtrack. It is normal for children to get potty trained then backtrack for awhile. It's all when they are ready. You can't force it, but you can do your hardest to encourage it.

Ask children if they need to go the bathroom helps b/c they forget or they just don't make it to the bathroom.

Reward her when she does go with cheerios or have toys in a cupboard that she can pick one from each time. This works WONDERFULLY! Once she gets the hang of it, she will become disinterested in the reward.

At my daycare centre, a lot of the children do not become fully trained until they are 2 1/2 (earliest) to 3 1/2 or even later in some cases so do not fret!!

Answer 3

Just be patient, It takes time to master that, I was in the same situation with my 3 1/2 year old boy, what I did was asking him like every other minute if he want to use te potty. Try to reward her every time she ask for it or use it by herself. You'll find laughing at yourself for asking this two or three weeks from now (I asked something similar a few weeks ago) Try also to make a big deal every time she wet herself (give her a little bath, change all her cloths) so she will get bored of getting change and not being able to play while you do that and she will be using the potty in no time. During the night it will take much longer, so don't expect her to do it just now, my son is using training pants during the night time.

Answer 4

DO NOT PUNISH HER!!

It's only going to make her resist going potty more.. unfortunately, the more you push, the more she is going to pull.

It's ok... really, many kids this age are not fully trained yet.. some haven't even begun.

I know it's exciting for you to know that buying and changing diaper days will soon be over, but just because we have those long awaited days in our minds, doesn't mean our girls are ready yet. Kids will revert.. they will do great for a while.. get you all used to taking them to the potty.. then suddenly stop. This is part of the training process, and their ability to control situations and to control what their body is going through.

With my daughter, we use the reward system. Each day we get a sticker on our calendar if she goes potty all day without accidents. After 1 whole week of stickers, she gets a couple dollars to buy whatever she wants. She knows she gets prizes when she goes potty. She learns to go potty, but she also learns the value of earning prizes, rather than getting them just because.

Sounds like you got the main part down.. she knows what to do, she just doesn't want to do it. Just continue to encourage her, stay positive. Don't make it hard on yourself.. it will only make it harder on her. Have patience, and know that 10 years down the road from now when she's 13, you're going to wish you had something as simple as potty training problems to deal with.

My friend gave her daugher time-out after every time she pooped in her diaper. Her daughter is 3 1/2, and has never never never gone in the potty... she will hold it all day long, because she knows the control she has over her mom.

encourage... don't discourage.. they may be little, but they are such powerful beings!

Answer 5

Just be patient -- I had two and one did especially well - but he was at a regular babysitter and she'd bring them all to the bathroom to go and each would like "follow" the other so they learned quickly. Kind of strange how it worked out. But my second one was like your daughter (was more in a daycare setting than a home) and he took longer and had boo boos. My daughter-n-law has a 5 year old daughter who still doesn't quite make it all the time. She gets mad at her - doesn't spank or anything. It can get frustrating but she'll do it on her own when she is all the way ready. She's almost there though. Don't worry. I think they get busy playing and don't want to stop playing which makes it "last minute."

Answer 6

I agree with the last person. You have to be patient. I'm potty training my 2 year old now and use stickers as rewards. You need an incentive for motivation and you need to praise her every time she does well. I'm a first time mom too and it's frustrating right now but you'll get over this phase. You have to keep reminding her that big girls use the potty and take her when you go to the bathroom too.

Answer 7

remind her gently. All the time through out the day. If you are going, ask her if she needs to go along.
This will work if you are a stay at home Mom. If she is tended by someone else while you are working, you may find that their techniques differ from yours and it could be confusing to your child. Or frustrating.
It's good to remember, too, that she will not be putting it in her pants when she is 14. It will happen. she is only 3 for a year. Don't rush. She'll get there for sure.
Don't let other people cajole you into pushing her. Let her set the pace.

Answer 8

I had the exact same issues with my kids. What I discovered was a routine schedule. I knew my kids body system well enough to know when they needed to go to the bathroom. When the boys got out of bed in the morning - they had to visit the bathroom before turning on the TV. That was the rule. No bathroom No TV. . And then after breakfast or any other meals was over, 30 -45 minutes later they were sent to the bathroom again. If they didn't try to go than no tv was turned off or the toys were taken away. (my kids loved tv and toys) A lot of the times I rewarded them if they went to the bathroom all by themselves without me telling them anything. I tried to encourage them and applauded them when they did it right. Pretty soon they began to go on a regular basis without me saying anything. At first I had to push and set a rigid schedule but all that changed once they began to understand their own bodies and how it worked.

Answer 9

Take away privileges. When I began attempting to potty train my son it was a daily battle. So what I did was when he would wet himself I would change him and explain to him that because he didn't ask to go to the restroom like a big boy, he was going to have to be in time out. So I would shut off the TV, take away his toys and sit him on the bed. I would start off with a small amount of time 20 minutes and with each time he wet himself the time went up. I know it sounds mean and a bit silly...but it worked. I had him potty trained in less than a week.

Answer 10

She needs some incentive to go to the potty. Try giving her a treat or a special privilege if she goes to the potty every single time. If she does not go and she wets herself, she should not be allowed the treat or privilege.

For some kids some form of scolding works if all other methods have failed. It may just get her to realize that big girls don't wet themselves or use diapers.

Answer 11

Well,now they say 3 is the age to start training. But,if you go to Www.charmin.com,they've got a potty training kit,which did wonders for my daughter,now 5,and it's FREE. Also visit the forum on Nanny911,alot of good advice there,too. Be consistant,if she doesn't ask about every hour,then take her to the pot yourself. Praise her when she goes,and reward her for #2 in the pot. ( I bought small lollies for poops,lol.) Rewards work well,good luck