us kids were raised in an unfriendly, disloyal, jealous and competitive attmosphere by our unhappy and disloyal parents so we were pretty mean and competitive when little. to me our 'rivalry' was more about how we were raised than any natural tendencies to compete in us kids. how were you raised and was there 'rivalry' between you kids? if yes, why do you think you were competitive?
2006-07-17 07:38:35 · 13 answers · asked by jimrich 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
it's funny when folks say "my parents were not like that" when a little deeper investigation may show that the parents did in fact influence their kids in subtle ways to be competitive and rivalrous. are you willing to look honestly at how you were parented?
2006-07-17 08:10:18 · update #1
my brother and me and my sister were always competitive and often phyiscall violent towards eachother as kids. i always felt this was a results for the fact that my parents favored him and told me and my sister about it often. our parents created the rivaly by telling us that he was a better child than we were and would succeed while we were failures. my sister and i use to call him "the golden boy" behind his back. we are all still competitive and a little bitter at our parents today, but my brother and i are the best of friends. he realized how differently our parents treated him and was always there to comfort me when i felt down. we still fight with eachother, but we no longer do things to cause eachther real pain because of what our parents did.
2006-07-17 07:43:28 · answer #1 · answered by smcmsam 2 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Oh, absolutely, sibling rivalry is ALL too common.
It is natural. Our parents were all, "We will not take sides. No hurting each other." What else can you do?
I think there was an undercurrent of jealousy in the greater family, but it was never acted out per se.
I remember thinking my sister was better/perfect, and I assume she was annoyed because I was always in the way. And heaven forbid if I did something great! As adults she has a tendency to downplay my accomplishments, but I rarely call her on it.
2006-07-17 07:44:14 · answer #2 · answered by emilsignia 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yea our parents didn't get along either so all of us kids have a rivalry that goes on and probably will go on til we die and we're all very competitive. i think we were all competitive was to see who could out do each other for example who got better things for christmas or any other holiday. our parents were never like that but i guess it comes with have 4 siblings.
2006-07-17 07:46:21 · answer #3 · answered by Lexy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sibling opposition has been in life in families for an prolonged time. yet that doesn't recommend which you're powerless and can't do something with it. in case you notice that all and sundry 3 are arguing or struggling with over some thing, step in as a be sure and as a parent of authority and help be sure the challenge. It counts plenty in case you nonetheless stay calm and ask what's occurring. in case you discover a lifelike answer for it, circulate forward and clarify it to the youngsters. you may rigidity to them that 'giving in' for the sake of the different isn't an illustration of weak point yet an illustration of braveness. nicely, the circumstances could variety and each you may require its very own answer. yet well-known, it is significant for you as a be sure to teach your infants "VALUES" and "sturdy habit". in case you strongly have faith in those, i think of that their relationships with one yet another will build as much as be a extra desirable one. As a touch suggestion- wait and notice with them and don't supply-up! your infants want various steerage and supervision from you. despite if others say that sibling opposition is incurable and only enable or no longer it is, nicely, i don't have faith in this. If there's a fashion, there's a distinctive answer.
2016-11-02 05:37:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Off the original topic, your grammar and spelling is atrocious.
When grouped with people for a length of time, one can grow tired of them. For instance, if you were put into a box with your mom, who you love and care for (in most cases at least) after an hour you would want to kill her, wouldn't you? The same happens with best friends, you get sick of it. So sometimes siblings who live apart are closer than those who live together, and sometimes vice versa, it's really up to the siblings themselves, depending on how easily annoyed they are.
2006-07-17 07:57:40 · answer #5 · answered by Alex J :) 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It is totally normal. My parents did not raise us to compete with each other but we still try to one up each other. I have six brothers and sisters and when you want to get noticed by your parents you will compete with the others. It is also a factor of jealosy. We get jealous when someone gets all the praise. It is true in all families.
2006-07-17 07:43:52 · answer #6 · answered by McKell S 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Normal. We got our behinds "tore up" if we got out of line. We did compete and we knew who was the best at what. I think this is a natural phase.
I have seen this be carried into adulthood and I think counseling would be of benefit. A neighbor constantly had to have better, do more and exhibit (to her) her wealth to her three sisters. I saw them on the fourth of July. She was still at it. That is sad. Let go of childish things and grow. God Bless.
2006-07-17 08:04:04 · answer #7 · answered by jfmm 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There never was any rivalry between my brother and I. It is the same with my son and daughter. They love each other and get along very well.
2006-07-17 07:43:11 · answer #8 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that sibling rivalry is normal but, to an extent its not. My brother and i dont fight too much and im definately not competitive with him. I think it depends on how close in age you are.
2006-07-17 07:46:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's normal to a certain extent.me and my little sister are constantly competing and argiung with each other but i try to contrl myself because my parents get mad.we weren't brought up in the same enviornment as you and your siblings and i have no clue why we are like that.we just are.
2006-07-17 07:43:18 · answer #10 · answered by curious lupi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋