I need to know how to break up with my boyfriend who just so happens to be my best guy friend for over 13 years? I don't want to hurt him because I still want us to be best friends, but I think I need to let him go.
2006-07-17 05:35:49 · 20 answers · asked by ElizabethTurner 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
This is a very tough and awkward situation. I twice made the mistake of getting personally involved with my best friend which was a female in both cases and it was a nightmare once and went smoothly the 2nd time. Either way, its not going to be e-z but, the best thing you can do is sit down and have a real heart to heart. Explain to him that you need to part from the personal aspect of things for "whatever reason(s)" but, be adamant that you in no way want to lose him as your best friend bcuz you value that friendship for "whatever reason(s)." It will sting a bit to know u no longer desire him in a personal way but, if he's your TRUE FRIEND then he'll do all he can to move past it and remain as close to you as he can through the friendship. Hopefully, he's one of those people who's actually strong enough to handle such a situation.
2006-07-17 05:42:48 · answer #1 · answered by oneluv66366 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a very difficult situation to be in. First of all, you should be able to sit down and talk to him about anything if you are best friends. Its going to be hard no matter what, but if you are truly friends, hopefully he will understand. The sad truth is most of the time in any break up, things end badly, otherwise they wouldn't end. Good luck and lets hope he's a little more of a friend than a boyfriend in this case. If he is, well then all should go well, but please be ready and prepared if it doesn't.
2006-07-17 12:43:17 · answer #2 · answered by Lynette W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it will be difficult to return to that stage where you two were once nothing more than best buds.
but it's not impossible to be friends and best friends again.
all you two need to do is to talk things through.
if he truly cares for you as a best friend and as someone who loves you, he'll understand.
of course things might be a little rough in the beginnning if u do decide to break it off. and don't remain in the relationship jus because you're afraid of the consequences, better to let him off now than later when the two of you might fall into deeper hurt.
talk to him.
this just needs time.
good luck, dear. :)
2006-07-17 12:41:57 · answer #3 · answered by sparklene 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Use Steve Martin's breaking up advice from his classic comedy album "Wild and Crazy Guy"...
You say, "I break with thee, I break with thee, I break with thee!" And you throw dog poopie on his shoe.
Seriously, there's no easy way. Just do it, cross your fingers, and hope for the best. You may lose him as a friend, though by by all means you should fight to avoid this reality. Break up, give him a little time, and see what you can do. Also, be aware, he may be more receptive to you as a friend when he finds someone else in the future.
2006-07-17 12:45:35 · answer #4 · answered by twiceborne 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you do not think its going anywhere.....
or...
I love you but i dont want to go so deep that if this relationship will end badly then we wont be to even talk to eachother and you friendship would really be jepordized.
or...
if you want him to really feel guilty make him dump you...
but i am with the other girl you friendship wont be the same at all or it wont last but at least you would be out of the relationship
2006-07-17 12:42:38 · answer #5 · answered by Nickita Chickita 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest. Don't make any promises you can't keep. (We'll always be friends, etc.) And don't get angry if he gets upset. If he asks for some time to think about it, let him have it. And if he decides that it hurts too much to be just friends, let him go. Don't settle for second-best. Best wishes.
2006-07-17 12:41:33 · answer #6 · answered by runninggirl23 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You use emotional honesty and tact. You won't be best friends anymore, but if you truly feels that you aren't meant to be a couple, then you have to do something. You cannot avoid the hurt. Be sensitive to his feelings but firm in yours. Good luck, dear.
2006-07-17 12:39:03 · answer #7 · answered by sacredmud 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very tough to do, once you became sexual to turn that off. Try honesty if you really value them. It's harder, but easier to maintain in a friendship, than some lame made up excuse. Good Luck!
2006-07-17 12:39:28 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him the truth, give him good reasons for why you can't be his GF but still be his friend. What you think is the difference.
Give him time & space and reassurance that you're still friends.
2006-07-17 12:39:21 · answer #9 · answered by Ash 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just try and explain to him that you don't exactly see him as a boyfriend, he might be a little hurt if he's gotten into the relationship more than you but he'll get over it, hopefully anyways
2006-07-17 12:41:43 · answer #10 · answered by mtugodfath3r 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋