From the mouth of babes...?

Question

What is the funniest thing your toddler has ever said?

Answer 1

It was hailing one winter day & my 2 year old daughter got my attention & very excitedly said, "Mommy, Mommy, oh no, icicles are falling from Heaven!"

Answer 2

My son used to call Piglet from Winnie the pooh PLIGET -
now he is 7 and into teenie bopper magazines with posters from the disney kids - he asked when I was younger - did I hang pics of my favorite stars too - I said of course - he asked who some of them were - I told him he would not be familiar with any of the names because most of them no longer acted - he said "Oh that's right - they're all dead"
I am only 30 !!!!!

Answer 3

I was in the hospital and my 5 year old son was asking his momma where daddy was. Momma told him that daddy was in the hospital but will be back in a few days. the next day at school, my son told everyone that his daddy was in the hospital having a baby . when I did come home from the hospital he was shocked that I did not have a baby and said "when momma goes to the hospital she comes home with a baby!! "

Answer 4

my son is 5 now, but was in pre-school last year. one day in class they were talking about healthy food and not healthy food. each child had to hold up a food item and say "(item) healthy or not healthy?" and the class would answer and the teacher would tell them if they were correct and explain. well, it was my sons turn and he picked up what was obviously a soda can and said "beer, healthy or not healthy" and the kids had a confused look and the teacher jumped in and said "no, no, he means soda". i wasn't there, but the teacher told me that her and her aid had to take turns excusing themselves from the room to laugh. it is funny because my husband and i, when we drink beer which is rarely, drink from beer bottles. although, my husband and both my sons love to watch the simpsons together.
my 2 1/2 year old loves elvis and dresses up and pretends to be elvis. i've been potty training him the bare bottomed way (no pants on during the day at home). well, he got all dressed up except, of course, the bottoms and he comes running in and tells me, "momma, i elvis!" and runs back to his toy room. on his way he suddenly stopped, turned around and said, "momma, look elvis butt!" and patted his butt. the water in my mouth ended up all over the table.
my husband, my 5 year old, my 2 1/2 year old and i were at a restaraunt waiting for our food and the waitress brought us our silverwear. so my boys like usual unwrapped them and my 2 1/2 year old yells, "momma, daddy f*ck!" my husband coughed his milkshake down and very clearing said, "no, fork."

Answer 5

not my toddler but my best friends toddler...

4 year old Bailey's nana has a dacshund named "Patience" and one day Bailey was getting out of the back of nanas car and tripped out of the car because she was in a hurry....so nana looks down at Bailey and says "Slow down Bailey! Patience is a virtue!" and Bailey never missed a beat and looked up at her nana and said "No nana, Patience is a dog!"
I laughed my head off that day! :o)

Answer 6

I have a cousin who told his mommy he did not want to hurt the baby, as he hit the baby with a small pillow. He was told the baby has feelings to, so the older child started to feel sorry for what he had did and replied he did not want to hurt the baby's feelings but he want to rub them as he was holding the baby's hand and rubbing it gently! Ages 4yr old and infant approx 12month old!

Answer 7

My son, when he was 3 misheard his older cousin and started screaming "What? You called me a mother f'er?! Why did you call me a mother f'er? Don't make me have to get ghetto on yo a$$!" LMAO It is even funnier because we are Asian and never ever lived anywhere near a ghetto.

Answer 8

My now 7 year old daughter loved Barney when she was little. Every day when the show ended and they were singing the "I love you" song, my then 2 year old daughter would sing "I love me, You love me."
I miss it.

Answer 9

when in 1st grade my son was running around tearing up his classroom his teacher grabbed him and said you have to stop this. He said I cant I had too much sugar on my breakfast cereal
he was in 2nd grade

Answer 10

my 3 year old daughter says everything funny...from "thats my baby butter wooshich" to taking a bath with her 5 year old cousin who is a boy and looking down saying "mine?"