How should one handle these types of people in an appropriate manner?

Question

Here is my problem, I'm 100% Jewish and sometimes I met people who ask me if I celebrate Christmas or something. I do not celebrate it by the way. When I tell them '' no I'm Jewish''. These people respond in a inappropriate manner in my opinion.
Like some people tell me '' You do not look Jewish''. While others respond by saying '' You do not look Jewish because of your blond hair and fair complexion''. And, my last name happens to not be Jewish at all and. Some people remarked on my last name as well saying '' that is not a Jewish last name''. I'm getting sick and tired of having to explain to these people that I'm 100% Jewish'''.
What is the best way to handle these type of people in an appropriate manner?

Answer 1

Oh, sweetie, I'm so sorry. People can be so rude and thoughtless.

When someone tells you you don't look Jewish, give them an innocent look and ask, "Well, what SHOULD Jewish people look like?" This should embarrass them into silence.

Of course, some imbeciles will continue with a list of attributes, at which point I would recommend that you just stare at them. That's right; just wait for them to fill up the silence with their own stupidity.

Some people simply don't deserve an anwer, and sometimes the best answer is no answer at all.

Answer 2

ok. I am not Jewish,but a Christian, so here goes. Good manners dictate that I tell you this. I have 100% Jewish friends,and they are blond/blue eyed too. I am told I don't "look" 100% Indian", even though I am Cherokee/Irish. As for Jewish last names? I always thought that "berg" was THE Jewish last name to have. Just because you don't have a Jewish last name,does not mean you are not Jewish. Jesus didn't have one either,and He was Jewish too. Poor manners you should excuse and tell these rude people that you don't need to answer their rude and insensitive questions. Tell them that you instead,celebrate Hannakuh ( I am not certain I spelled it right) and that Jewish people do not celebrate Christmas. I don't think that last names dictate the type of religion,beliefs,careers,ect, you have/or are. In that case,if I were to go by that,then I would be a cardboard box,and that would be all I am,and not a writer/mom/wife/friend!

Answer 3

Though I don't know the differences between names or religions or anything, I can see how some people might be shocked to hear that you are when you tell them. Also, many Jewish people celebrate Christmas with other members of their family or friends. I don't think these people are being rude (not that I'd say those things, but it wouldn't bother me if they did), but the best way to handle it is just to say "Yep. I'm 100% Jewish!" And they probably won't ask any more. I'm protestant, by the way. At least I think I am. I've never really been baptized or anything, but I celebrate Christmas.

Answer 4

Well by you telling other people you're Jewish comes off as rather vague to people who aren't exposed to Jewish culture. Why don't you answer them by saying 'We have Hanukkah instead of Christmas' instead so they somehow get an idea. It's like asking a Jehova's Witness if they celebrate Christmas too, and they reply, I'm Jehova's Witness--but that doesn't seem to make sense. People who are not informed would always question why or why not? Also, this is such a little thing to get worked up about.

Answer 5

I'm sorry that there are rude people in the world. You don't really owe anyone an explanation. These people are just ignorant in the real sense of the word. If you want to have fun with them you ask them what a Jewish person should look like. It will only embarrass them. If not, just smile and say, "I don't celebrate that holiday." If they ask why, just reply, "personal reasons."

Answer 6

I'm sure that's frustrating for you. When a religion is so closely melded to a cultural identity it can cause frustration for those who don't fit into the stereotypical image.

If you're talking to someone in passing, don't bother telling them you're Jewish. If they push the issue, distract them. If you can't distract them, you can gently remind them that it's a religion in addition to being a heritage. If they start in about the way you look, interrupt them and ask them what they believe/don't believe. If they don't tell you, then say that you don't have to talk about your religion with them either. If they do tell you, pretend to size them up and (whether or not they fit the stereotype) say, well you don't LOOK like a ______.

If they have even an ounce of sense, they will change the subject.

Answer 7

Christmas:

Say something like 'Well I don't actually celebrate Christmas because, as a Jew, I'm still waiting for the Messiah, but hey, it's your celebration. Enjoy it.'

Looking Jewish:

'So you don't think I look Jewish, well I must because I am one. What do you think a Jew looks like? I mean, when I look at you I can't tell whether you're Protestant, Methodist or catholic. Can you tell what faith people have just by looking at them? How clever. I wish I could.'

Name:

'You know we don't all have names ending in 'berg' . Look at Sammy Davies Junior. He was Jewish and black!'

Finally:

'Yes it's true that I'm a Jew and, do you know what? I'm proud of it!'

Answer 8

The best way to handle them in an appropriate manner would be to calmly explain to them the differences, and unlike what bigots think, being Jewish is not a birthright, it is a choose, like any religion.
But then again that could take forever, so by telling them that it is a sin in your religion to talk to ignorant people, you must ignore them. (if they note that your religion does not have sin, then you are able to talk to them.)
B

Answer 9

There is no surefire way to handle the amazingly rude people of the world. Sometimes I just get very silent and look at them with no comment. Usually, they end up realizing they've said something inappropriate and apologize, but not always. I wish we could all live long enough to see these kinds of stereotypes end forever.

Answer 10

Just say "Oy vey!", throw up your hands in disgust, and walk away. :) Heh, seriously...just try explaining to them that not ALL Jewish people have dark hair or a prominent nose or any other of the stereotypical Jewish features...much the same as that not all Irish people have red hair and freckles.