answer them? She just turned 5 and is about 25lbs over weight. She asked me today if she could come to dance classes and she also showed an interest in the junior cheerleading squad for the basketball team. How do I tell her that she just cant do these things right now due to her weight without being negative. She wont make the cheerleading squad, and she's just not a dancer. I have tried to encourage her mom to give her better foods and take the television out of her room that she watches about 6 hours a day. Yes, I realise this is very bad and I am doing my best to help her with no junk food or television or computer when she is at my house and she has to play outside in the backyard and I try and take her to the park once a week with my little girl.
How do i appropriatly tell a 5-year old that her weight is a barrier to some of the activities she would like to do?
2006-07-16 16:28:50 · 26 answers · asked by skattered0077 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
reese...perhaps you should read...I DO TAKE HER PLACES TO GET EXERCISE!!!!!
2006-07-16 16:36:20 · update #1
You don't. She is five, and your dance and cheerleading squads should be ashamed for denying a 5-year old the experience of extra-curricular activities. She is at the age in sports when ability doesn't matter... e.g., everyone gets to bat the ball, and everyone gets to get out on the soccer field. Your rejection will not help her improve her situation. Encouragement and inclusion will, even if she is not very good at it.
2006-07-16 16:33:23 · answer #1 · answered by benbobbins 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, you don't tell the child anything. That would crush her and make food even more important than it already is. You said her mother is your friend, then talk to her again. But please be careful in how you do this.
Does your friend know that you have imposed special rules for her child while she is at your house?
Also, what kind of cheer squad is discriminating at 5 years old?My 13 year old is a cheerleader, she didn't have to officially try out until this year...7th grade! Squads at this young age are about learning not keeping others out. If this is the kind of squad you are sending your child to, please reconsider what you're doing. That kind of competition is not good for the little ones. Sure, she's learning to be the 'perfect cheerleader' but at what price?
Please DON'T discourage the little girl from wanting to cheer or dance or anything else. Enjoying these activities will encourage her to be more active.
2006-07-17 09:26:28 · answer #2 · answered by long_ebony_locs 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldnt tell her that she is over weight to do some activities, even if she maybe. My niece is 7 and was looking at a pair of her pants and said Am I really that fat??......My niece is not overweight at all in fact she is pretty tiny, tall and slender. My sister never has told my niece she was fat or anything like that but she sees on tv that girls are suppose to look a certain way. My point is that 5,7,10 year olds shouldnt even be worrying about weight, I find that very sad. You said that you take her to the park and try to get her to lose weight by doing exercise, but maybe she doesnt want to do that. If you really care you should let her try out for the cheerleading or do dance...if they dont let her then tell her you will help her. Teach her some dance by yourself, if shes interested in it that is how you get her to enjoy exercise not by doing things she doesnt like. Also if she is overweight, really overweight not just 25 pounds when she gets to be a teenager she will have enough people telling her she isnt good enough because of her weight, she doesnt need to her it from people that are suppose to care about her. I feel that you are feeding into that everyone should look a certain way, but I understand that you are looking out for her health at the same time. But shes five she may not look that way in another year or a few. I hope you that you understand that its not good to tell a 5 year old that she is over weight no matter how you tell her. Just so you know Im over weight and my mother was always on me about losing weight and I made me feel terrible, I knew how kids could act but I didnt feel that my mom should of been critizing me and putting me down
2006-07-17 00:29:10 · answer #3 · answered by ga_lynn84 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How could a 5 year oldbe denied cheerleading that is a load of bull. and why do you think she is not a dancer. I have been a dancer since I was 3. I am one of the clumsiest people you will ever meet. I was a little chunky at 11 thinned out now though. She is 5 years old. let her enjoy being five. If her doctors are worried about her tey will say something to correct the problem you worry about your child. Her weight should not hold her back from any kind of normal 5 year old activity. My brother was heavy and he is a professional dancer. (ballet) and his wife as well.
2006-07-16 23:38:08 · answer #4 · answered by momofaliciaemily 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I use to be a overweight little girl. Dont tell the little girl talk to her mother. Tell her mother to change her diet. For example if the little girl wants milk give her 2% but don't tell her she won't even notice the difference trust me. For desert get her ice cream that is half the fat. It taste just as good. Also ask her if she wants to play a sport like basketball. Even though she is overweight she could still try and that would give her more exercise than going to the park. Also when she wants sweets tell her one or the other. For example if she wants ice cream at around noon tell her she can not have water ice near dinner time. Make her choose. And about telling her she is overweight I don't think that is the way to go. Even if you find a way that seems nice to you it will seem hard on her. Talk to her family
Good lUck
2006-07-19 15:44:06 · answer #5 · answered by kirstar17 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
even if she's not a dancer, just going to dance class is going to help her out. that's one less hour she'll watch tv, and if she likes it like my daughter did, she'll be practicing dance steps throughout the house. cheerleading would do the same. I'm trying to figure out how she wouldn't make the squad, most sports for kids that age don't have tryouts, unless she's talking about doing it when she's older.
when you take her to the park, does her mother go with you? maybe you should invite her to go with you or go for walks around the neighborhood (if you live nearby) and tell her about the classes and activities your daughter does and let her know her daughter might like them too. or ask her if they want to get together a couple times a week and either go for a walk or a bike ride. you'll get both of them away from the tv then. tell her you feel like you need be more active or you just need to get out of the house for a bit and having someone with you makes it more fun.
2006-07-17 00:27:45 · answer #6 · answered by Jbeth 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
seriously i doubt cheerleading squads for 5 year olds wouldnt accept a child because she is overweight. and what kind of 5 year old is a "dancer" obvioulsy when youre that young and in a dance class, you are there to learn. telling her she wont be able to do things becasue she is overweight will not do much for her self esteem when shes older. let her join the things, that way she will be getting out and exercising. when youre 5 years old your weight is not a barrier for anything you do. i think you need more help dealing with her weight issue then she does.
2006-07-16 23:36:01 · answer #7 · answered by mclen446 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I didn't know 5 yr olds had to "try out" for cheer leading squads that's pitiful. Good grief maybe if someone would take her to some place where she could exercise she wouldn't have the extra weight. Don't put so much stress on the girl. Blame the parents not the child and get her involved in something
2006-07-16 23:34:14 · answer #8 · answered by reese172003 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU DONT!!! A five year old has no concept of being over weight, this is in her mother's hands. I do however feel like you should try again to talk to her mother because that is way to much tv especially if it is affecting her weight which affects her health. Also, what kind of cheerleading squad for five year olds doesn't let everyone participate?
2006-07-17 00:16:26 · answer #9 · answered by Mrs_Siress 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would suggest you keep your mouth shut. your opinions are contemptible. she can do whatever she wants to with her weight. why on earth can't she be in dance class? Our friend has a daughter in a dance troupe - her daughter is very thin - but the troupe has several very large girls and women. i remember all kinds of heavy girls playing sports when i was in school and i have a niece who is a star basketball player and is 180 pounds and 5'7".
Please don't put your sick negative views on this girl. you may be helping by having her play outside and eat good foods at your house, but really it sounds like you may be just trying to shove down everyone's throats how superior to her mom you think you are.
Again, the girl can do anything she wants with her weight. it's only the disgusting attitudes of smug people like you that will harm this girl. get over yourself. p.s. you could give her a clue that being a cheerleader is a stupid, pathetic waste of a girl's life.
2006-07-16 23:38:39 · answer #10 · answered by cassandra 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋